I ran up to my room. I don't like this. I don't want them listening to me like there lives count on it, because they don’t. I would never hurt them ever! I don't like them calling me queen. How will this effect the child I wish to have?
"We will not call you queen if you wish us not to." William said. I forgot he could read my mind. Oh how could I be so stupid as to forget that.
“I don’t want to be called Queen! I am your family! Family members do not do call other family members their Queen and King like their lives count on it!” I said. I was close to crying, but I was also yelling. I felt so stupid for not closing my mind off to everyone. I couldn't think at the moment but it was a skill that I made turned into a habit.
"You are not stupid. You are very smart. You are just distracted at the moment. And what is that I got from picking your brain about having a child?" He asked.
"Don't tell anyone! I will kill you if you do! I don't want anyone to know yet. I have been thinking about it. And I crave someone to carry my blood line on. I crave to have a little girl or boy of my own like so many other people." I said. I was again almost in tears. My secret was out and I didn't want it to be. Not yet at least.
"Don't worry. I will not tell anyone until you wish me to tell." He said and rubbed my back. I started crying at that. Ambrose came in at once and hugged me.
"Leave. I will help her out." He told William as they traded spots. I was in Abrose's arms crying. He held me close to him. I knew that I shouldn't be crying, I was some sort of queen to them.
"I want to sleep but I don't think that I can sleep right now." I said as I stopped crying. I hate it when people are nice to me and try to make me feel better when something makes me want to cry. I usually just want to climb in a hole and cry myself to sleep. I am usually alone when I do cry just to avoid others seeing me cry and thinking that I am not as strong as I make them believe.
"Then I will make you something to make you sleep. Until then get ready for bed. You have earned it. After all of that work that you did you have earned a long nap. I could never do what you have done today even if had had the gifts that you have." Ambrose said and went away.
I got ready for bed like I was told to do. I laid down to sleep and let my eyes drift close. I was very sleepy but I could not fall asleep just yet. I slipped under the covers to get all warm and curled up in them. I was relaxed before I fall asleep once more.
I am in a field. This field is full of green tall grass and trees are around, surrounding this whole field making it a private little place to talk. It looks beautiful. A place I will defiantly have to find sometime in the near future. There are flowers in this grass that are all different colors, but still pale colors that look like what they are around. I see a girl. A little girl. She looks like me but smaller. She is beautiful. She has the same red eyes that I had gotten just that day. I looked at her with fear in my eyes. She must have been the old queen.
I feel like I should bow to her or something. She was queen much longer then I have been and she deserves some respect of that. This queen work is harder then the books make it look. I know that she doesn't want me to do that. I am her equally in some ways. But I have yet to truly except who I am. And who I have become. Who Jasper made me. I had no clue what all those others had meant when I had killed them, but the moment I had I knew that I was not a normal new one.
"Do not be afraid. Do not fear who you have become. If I had feared what I had become then I would died long before I had really loved. I had to learn to live life and then take what was given to myself as many often have to. I am you. I was the queen until I finally died. You are meant for greatness. Do what you wish. And have no fear in what you do. Otherwise others will not trust you and hold little to you. You are meant to be this so please do not put this role as some sort of stupid little game to others." She said to me. I knew she was talking to me. But I couldn't. I couldn't not fear at what I have become.
"How am I supposed to not fear this? I have red eyes! I don't know what I am supposed to do! Help me! Help me figure it out. I can't do this alone. I need another queen to show me how to do this. My family can't do this. They can't help me!" I begged. She smiled and looked up at me because I was taller then she was. I wonder if she had to ask the other queen for help with this too? I knew she had more to say, but would get nowhere with this thinking I had.
"Keep calm. You need to stay still for this to work. Okay? It will be painful, I should let you know that. I am going to give all the answers you want. But you must not move." She said. She put a hand on my shoulder and pulled up. She forced herself in to me. It hurt, but I didn't move. And then I woke up.
"What is going on here? Did I tell you that you all could come into my room while I was in slumber?" I asked everyone in the room. I woke up to faces around me.
"No you didn't. But you start to twitch and you looked like you were in pain in your sleep and we had to check on you. Are you alright?" William asked. I looked around.
"Who are you all? You do not look familiar. Ah but Ambrose long time no see." I said. This wasn't me talking. This was that girl who got in me. That old queen. I had to ask more questions, but I couldn't find my voice.
"What are you talking about, love? You see me each and every time you open your eyes. We are friends, your family. Why do you not remember us?" Ambrose asked me. I knew he was feeling scared, but I couldn't do anything.
"What do you mean, my love? My family has died. They died long ago before you were made. I made you, Love. Do you not remember me?" I asked. I saw Ambrose realize what had happened.
"The old queen? You have returned? But how? How have you come back?" Ambrose asked this old queen.
"I have come back because someone needed help. Someone needed me to tell them what to do to understand how to deal with what has happened. I knew that with the way she was thinking I would not be able to tell her, but that I would just have to show her." She said. I don't know her name. I was hoping someone would say her name for me.
"Selena, will you please just give her the answers she seeks and leave? I would like to have my Gabby back. I am sorry to say this but, Selena, I do not love you as I love Gabby." He spoke sweetly to her. I could understand that. She was his maker. And even I speak like that to my maker. But than again, to me, my maker was my dad.
"Sure. I will miss you. But I will see you as soon as she needs her answers again. Bye, Love." She said. I had my answers and with them a searing pain as she left me.
"Is she alright?" Was the first thing I heard though my sleep fogged brain.
"What ... what happened?" I asked and turned over on my side.
"She is alright. She is back to herself. It will take sometime, but this will soon past." I heard another person say.
"She doesn't know who's talking." Said any person. I wanted to curl up to whatever was closest to me and sleep forever.
"You can't sleep forever, Gabby." One person said. I heard them laughing at me. I opened my eyes and saw Ambrose's chest under my head. I felt his arm pulling me closer to him. I cuddled closer to him and laid my head back down on his chest. If I was going to go back to sleep then I was going to sleep nice and warm.
"I'm up. I'm up. What you want?" I asked sleepy. The only thing that I cared about is sleeping this away. Whatever this is.
"We want to make sure you are all right. And it seems you are. So we will leave." Eric said. I could finally tell who was talking. Them not asking me what my dream was about got me up a little faster.
"You're not going to ask what the dream was?" I asked. They shook their heads and left the room.
"It wasn't a dream. The old queen, Selena, decided to help answer some questions that we couldn't." Ambrose told me. I cuddled closer and fall back asleep.
"It's time to get up, Gabby." Ambrose whispered into my ear. I felt his breath on my ear and knew that it was time to get up.
"Have you accept what you are?" He asked me as I got dressed for the day.
"Yes. I have. Thanks to that old queen person. And the answers she gave me hurt like acid running through my veins." I said. I didn't like her she hurt me badly. Ambrose smiled at me. I knew that He knew something that I didn't know. I was going to ask about that later. I smiled back at him.