Star Trek meets reality

The legendary crew of the NCC-1701 assemble. . . But they are not all the ones from the same universe. Follow the ragtag crew while they discover why fictional characters have been coming to life and perhaps, just maybe, go boldly where no one has gone before.


5. Home

Spock felt a hand place itself on his shoulder and then shake him. His brown eyes opened, half asleep, noticing they were in a dark location. Except the inside of the air-car was making a beeping sound while a bright light emitted from the top. Spock turned his head to see three Bill's looking right at him saying something  he did not understand. Logically, his brain was not yet fully operational. Spock nodded along with what Bill had to say. It was what Jim usually did after being on his end of the stick and Spock was the driver. Bill turned away and as he did, Spock's eyes closed.

"Spock!" Spock awoke with a startle seeing Bill glaring right at him.

"Yes?" Spock said.

"Are you a vegetarian or a meat eater?" Bill asked.

"Vegetarian."  Spock said, his eyes started to close.

"Mister Spock," Spock's droopy eyes became open. "I respect your beauty sleep, but wouldn't it be logical that you sleep on a bed?" Bill asked. "Instead of inside a air-car, no less?"

"I am wide awake." Spock said.

Bill sighed.

"You fell asleep like a baby in my air-car," Bill said, patting on the back rest of the driver seat. "Whatever you were doing before being displaced purely was exhausting and meditating cannot make you be ready for the day. That only calms you. You are sleeping in the guest room while I make a few calls to ensure my family is still alive." He pointed at the Vulcan. "You are my guest for the next hour."

"Quite logical." Spock said, as his eyes started to close.

"I have one question." Bill said.  

"Yes?" Spock said.

"Would you prefer being referred to as Mister Spock or just Spock?" Bill asked.

"When on duty," Spock said. "You may refer to me as President Spock of Vulcan."

Bill's jaw somewhat dropped.

"President?" His voice became high pitched. "Here I thought you would be a Emperor!"

"Highly illogical in a democratic nation." Spock mumbled.

Bill closed the driver's side door then  walked around the front toward the passenger side door. He opened the passenger side door where the Vulcan had closed his eyes once more. He had to stir the Vulcan awake, "You have to get out of the car." Bill reminded the Vulcan. Bill didn't want to get close to this Vulcan and then have to go their separate ways for good. The last time. . . . The last time he befriended someone like Spock, it broke into pieces. It was his biggest mistake. And it hurt Bill, emotionally, but he didn't really let it show save for his wife Elizabeth. Bill was afraid of history repeating. De would not blame him for that. He was only helping Spock as a responsible civilian. That was it at least Bill believed. Bill did not want to make a mistake that would otherwise be a stab to the back for the emotional Vulcan.

Bill realized the Vulcan was going to crash and fall in his garage without help. Spock got out of the air-car with half open eyes. Bill was beside the passenger side door. Spock started to fall with eyes closed. Bill's eyes widened then he reached his arms out toward Spock. His arms caught the drowsy Vulcan. Spock, surprisingly, was not heavy but light weight. Which was odd for a being superior to him but then again Leonard was the same way too during filming for Star Trek: The Original Series. Bill lifted one of Spock's arms over his shoulder then backed off from the passenger side door and closed the door with his foot with a loud smack. He made his way to the garage door. Bill opened the door using his right hand. Next, getting in? That was at first a difficult task. Bill turned sideways and walked into the house. He could see the lights were not on. Normally, it would be nighttime when he would be doing this helping someone to bed. But it was daytime. Bill went through the kitchen. Down the hall, took two right turns, one left turn, one straight path, opened a door, sideways walked in, and came into the guest room. Bill sat Spock down on the bed. He went over to the side of the bed and pulled the sheets back.

"Spock, get undressed."  Bill said.

"Why?" Spock said.

"Because you are going to bed," Bill said, as a tell tale smile grew on his face. "Logically."

"It is illogical to go into bed naked." Spock said.

"Some people do that." Bill said, shaking his head coming over to the Vulcan.

"Do you?" Spock asked.

Bill was taking Spock's unusual boots off when he looked up toward Spock with a insulted expression on his face.

"Mr President, I wouldn't tell you that." Bill said.

"Unusual. . ." Spock said. "I never heard someone be excited to refer to me by a title that no longer matters." Bill went over to the closet then searched for a shirt. "Most humans have that bitter tone when referring to me by that title." Bill took out a plaid buttoned up checkered shirt. "You are the first."

"I'll get the pants and you get the shirt." Bill said.

"I will not be undressed by someone who is not my mate." Spock said.

"Mister Spock," Bill said. "You are half asleep!" Bill pointed at Spock's droopy eyes. "You are under no condition to argue with me." Bill took out a pair of soft long pants from the drawer in front of the mirror. "Elizabeth wanted to be prepared in the moment that one of us kills someone and we had to get rid of the evidence. She was right that a moment like this would happen just under different circumstances." He had a short laugh. "Sorry if the shirt doesn't fit you."

"Why should it not?" Spock inquired, raising his left gray eyebrow.

"Because they are my size." Bill said.

Spock scanned Bill then tilted his head to the side raising his right brow with a shrug. Spock tiredly took off what had covered his torso. Bill gasped seeing Spock's bony figure.  Bill shook his head then  took off the Vulcan's pants. What he saw mostly surprised the eighty year old actor. Spock was not wearing briefs. And he had a green penis. Bill speeded over to the drawer and rapidly searched for a specific pair. Spock was sitting there watching Bill's ass move from side to side. Spock put both hands over his penis feeling entitledly embarrassed. Bill gasped, with a "AH HA!". Bill held up the pair that read 'Not in front of the Klingons' in bold text. Bill turned around with a grin on his face then approached the tired Vulcan sitting on the bed.

"You are going to need to wear underwear from now on." Bill said. Then his grin faded. "Spock, I am a fully grown man. You can uncover your private." Bill came over then held it to Spock. "I am not going to be left hanging."

Spock missed instead grabbing Bill's shoulder then fell sideways out of bed taking Bill with him. Spock had face planted on the floor. There was long period of silence as Bill saw Spock's erected not-so-double-ridged penis. Bill blinked. Then Bill started to laugh. At himself, no less. It made complete sense. He looked over to see the Vulcan was fast asleep. Bill slowly slid himself out from underneath Spock lowering the volume of his laughter until it was softer. Bill managed to slip manly underwear on the Vulcan, then long pants that went over the Vulcan's ankle, and god was it easy. Thank god they kept briefs for all sizes in case their guest didn't come with underwear. Spock was out when Bill's stomach growled. He took a step back wondering how to put the shirt on.

"Oh screw it." Bill said, lifting the Vulcan up to his feet.

Spock was bent over, head on Bill's shoulder, and arms dangling to his side. He had his hand on Spock's backside. The folded shirt was left on the edge of the bed. Spock was mumbling in his sleep this time talking to McCoy. Bill knew it because of the unmistakenable dialogue that would be in the banter scenes in Star Trek: The Original Series. Spock was actually debating in his sleep.  Too cute. Bill could see a parallel here from The Search for  Spock to this moment. He lifted Spock up into his arms and slid him into bed.  He slid the Vulcan into bed. The Vulcan turned on his right side snuggling up shirtless. Bill slid the blanket up to Spock's shoulders. He picked up Spock's laundry then walked out of the room.

"I heard you all ready." Bill said, hearing his rumbling stomach.

Bill walked out of the room. He took the route that he came through earlier but in the long hallway he opened a door, went inside, tossed the clothes into the washer, and took out the dry clothes then put them into a laundry basket. He put the dirty clothes from inside the other basket into the washer. Bill took the basket into the living room. Bill returned to the kitchen. He took out a carton of eggs, the bread, the frying pan, two plates, and turned on the toaster. He took out the box of butter then a gallon of milk. Five minutes later, Bill had breakfast ready for himself complete with a glass of milk. As he stabbed a fork into the scrambled egg, Bill realized he hadn't checked if he had vegetarian friendly breakfast.

"Eggs," Bill said, out loud. "Bread, milk, tomatoes, berries, lettuce--" A slow smile spread on his face as he got an idea. "First time's the charm!"

He would make the salad taco in the next two hours. That was decided.  He finished breakfast and put the dish into the dish washer along with the fork. He set the table up for the Vulcan with the plate he had left out. Bill went to the living room then turned on the  TV. He pressed the guide button to see it was 8:30 PM. Which wasn't bad with his timing. Suddenly Bill saw a familiar image on the screen. Wait, that was his face, but in Star Fleet uniform circa 2286 right out of Wrath of Khan. Were they requesting his presence? Apparently someone must be arranging for Star Fleet's existence in this messed up scenario but it was logical to unite the entire world and calm the remaining real people down. It occurred to Bill that he wouldn't be doing it as a publicity stunt but to help others. There was only one way to find out why they wanted him. He raised the remote up then turned the volume up.

"If you see Captain James T. Kirk in this uniform please report him to Star Fleet headquarters located in Star Base 1," The reporter said. "Or bring him to Star Fleet headquarters if he is cooperative. The directions to the  Star Base are installed into shuttle pods that are currently being located. It is urgent that he be brought to the authorities."

Bill turned the TV off and started to make calls to various family member. He was pacing the room calling them repeatedly. He called his son, his daughters, and his grandchildren. He only got static on his end and left voice messages. It occurred to him that they were all gone. Out of existence. His world appeared to be pretty bleak at that moment. More bleaker than it was two hours ago. Bill was a mess sitting on the couch with the iphone beside him and his eyes were red. Why wasn't he taken? Why wasn't he turned into one of his fictional characters? Why was he still existing? It was not fair. He wiped the tears off his cheeks. Bill stood up then went into the general direction of the master bedroom. He was trembling. Broken. Bill came to their bedroom, walked over to Elizabeth's side of the bed, then picked up Elizabeth's shirt and breathed in her scent. He placed it back on the bed, flattened it out, and imagined her fast asleep with one arm on her forehead and her other hand on the edge of the bed. He could feel loss. Perhaps when this is over, she will be right back on the bed fast asleep, and Bill could tell her everything afterwards. Bill sighed then made his way out of the master bedroom heading straight to the kitchen. He had a smooth shell to heaten up, after all.

Afterwards, Bill put the two shells filled to the brim by salad onto a plate. He went to the garage. He had to check if JC Pennys were still open. Just to be on the safe side for Spock. Thirty-three minutes later Bill returned driving into the garage. The car came to a gentle landing. He got out of the air-car then came out of the vehicle and went through the door.  Bill came inside the kitchen to see Spock sitting down on a chair with ruffled hair. The shirt appeared to be tucked in but it looked rather baggy on him as did the pants. The sparkly pink pants did the Vulcan a certain form of injustice. His eyes were not as droopy as they were before. He was shoe less.

"Spock, you need some new clothes for this century." Bill finally said,stifling back a laugh.

Spock turned his head in the direction of the man.

"This is a very tasty breakfast," Spock said.  "You are on a diet?"

"No," Bill said. "Elizabeth likes to add spice into dinner every once in a while."

"Elizabeth as in your mate?" Spock inquired.

"Yes." Bill said.

"Odd," Spock said. "Those pictures of Mr Nimoy indicate you were close."

Bill's eyebrows rose upwards.

"What pictures?" Bill asked.

"The black and white ones." Spock said.

"I don't have black and white pictures." Bill denied.

Spock held up three photographs in-between his fingers  from the table.

"Those. " Bill said.

"I was unaware that you got disrobed yourself for this picture." Spock said.

"Spock, you broke into my safe!" Bill said.

"There was no safe." Spock said, lowering the pictures back onto the tables.

Bill frowned.

"Then where was it?" Bill asked.

"In the pillow." Spock said.

"In the pillow?" Bill repeated, eyebrows raised.

"Affirmative," Spock said. "There were others in the pillowcase."

"Good god Elizabeth." Bill said, rubbing his forehead. "I don't know how she got her hands on that."

"You were a role model?" Spock asked.

"No,no, no," Bill saw that the television was on a channel playing old music. Music that he hadn't heard in years. "I lied in a interview with Leonard that he never took pictures of me naked. He loved to use that camera." He had a fond smile raising the volume as the buzzing in his ears was annoying. That  noise has been plaguing him for fifty years. "But we never did the photos together."

Spock did not reply.

"We never took a picture of ourselves naked together," Bill said. "My only requirement was being painted green and Leonard to be wearing those spare pointy ears." Spock raised an eyebrow at first from Bill's story. "Leonard declined."

Spock lowered his eyebrow.

"Naturally," Spock said. "I can see why."

"Do you have ringing in your ears?" Bill asked.

"Negative." Spock said.

"I have been walking with it for fifty years," Bill said. "Music drowns it out." Spock took a bite out of the salad taco.  "No matter how often you change the subject you are still going shopping with me."

Spock nearly spat out what he was eating at the last part. He smacked his chest then downed a glass of water and used a napkin to clean his mouth. Bill was surprised to see that kind of reaction from the Vulcan. Did he see something else that no one should ever see? His mind darted to the guest room's direction contemplating what else was in there that he was aware of or what he could not be aware of using wild guesses. The Vulcan certainly didn't laugh at himself at his own reaction but simply resumed eating.  Bill's eyes returned to Spock's direction.

"What else did you see?" Bill asked.

"Just the pictures." Spock said.

"Your reaction says otherwise." Bill said.

"Caught a tomato in my throat." Spock said.

Bill came to the other side of the table then out his arms on the counter.

"Are you afraid of dressing up like me?" Bill looked the man in the  eye. "Because I am very determined that you dress up as yourself." Bill pointed at the shirt being worn. "What you are wearing screams WILLIAM SHATNER'S PROPERTY!" Bill lowered his hand. "But you are not my property. And it doesn't fit you."

"I abolished slavery on my planet." Spock said.

"I get that," Bill said. "What I mean is. . ." Bill looked over to the side with a raised eyebrow. "Just how far does my shirt go down on you?"

"To the knee." Spock said.

"No, the thigh." Bill said, with a beaming expression on his face.

Spock appeared as though he were caught.

"Was that a trick question?" Spock asked.

"It was." Bill said. "Besides. I could have been. The shirt. Be like a dress. On you. If I were taller than you."

Spock let the silence sink in as he pictured himself in a larger checkered plaid shirt. Bill appeared to be amused at himself. Spock analyzed Bill to be the kind of man who laughed at himself and often parodied himself, which was  a refreshener from the various other men known in his world. There was a term for that word. Adam Westing. The idea of Spock wearing untucked shirt that was buttoned up that reached to his knees was unsettling. And it was illogical.  If Jim were here, he would be snickering and asking "Do you need a chest binder?" in the most sincere way possible but serious manner.

The Vulcan let the idea go while clearing his throat.

"And my previous robes?" Spock asked.

"That  is totally Monk styled. Monks don't wear dresses." Bill said. "We don't see that kind of Ambassador robes at all in the Kelvin timeline. Well, then again, there are rarely seen Ambassador duties being done." He shook his hand. "But from what I have seen in the comics is a different story." He paused, as Spock took a drink. "WAIT A SECOND." He narrowed his eyes in the direction of the Vulcan. "You are a president not an Ambassador. Why were you wearing Ambassador attire?"

"It is best to fool Star Fleet that my intentions are to continue the same way as possible," Spock said, lowering the glass. "And the Ambassador attire is indeed a new style in the Vulcan attire. I took the liberty to remove the medals that were being scratched in the washer machine five minutes ago and resume the procedure."

"Fascinating." Bill said.

"Say that again," Spock said. "But a little more . . . teasingly, please?"

Bill's eyebrows rose up at Spock's request. It was unusual. That he could admit to. I must remind him of Jim, Bill thought, or Jim usually aroused him by saying his favorite word in his ear. The idea itself was very logical. So instead of saying it in his dramatic teasingly manner  Bill decided to do it with a purr. A seductive kind of one. It was the least he could do for the poor man.

"Fascinating." Bill said,with a seductive purr.

Spock briefly closed his eyes as a small smile appeared on his face briefly lowering his head toward the plate.

"Thank you." Spock said, then he took a bite out of the salad taco and chewed it.  

Bill stared at Spock, one hand cupping the side of his face, appearing to be perplexed.

". . . You are much stranger in person than I thought."  Bill said.

"Not bad yourself," Spock said. "And I assume you know where this Miss Nimoy is."

Bill grinned taking out his iphone.

"You betcha." Bill said.

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