– 19 –
I remember a time where uniform actually meant something. You could argue with me that the real time for uniform having meaning was back in WWI. But what if I was to tell you that a special kind of uniform existed alongside Susan’s belongings? It’s not a stretch, and it’s nowhere near unbelievable. It has some ground to it along with some left overs that can’t quite be finished. Sierra, that’s not what the uniform is. It’s just a name that enters my mind whenever I’m thinking about someone.
Alpha, we would end up calling this out to scream on the balcony. Susan would be the first in line back at the house. She’d let out the mightiest roar that would spread across the horizon. Just when time is sinking into the bottom of the hourglass, I’d end up filtering the grains that don’t serve a purpose. Is it possible that such a lame excuse for wanting to be around is because of sand? Yes, and I thought about how sand demonstrates the short time we have in life. It’s even shorter when you wish to make a difference that can’t ever happen. So, I took to the internet, I found a website that belonged to some old friends.
This site was shared with a small group of us. They shared the many stories that were scattered online. I lost interest around the sixteenth video; displaying the final moments of a young girl who couldn’t reach the top of the Ferris wheel. Looking into it back then was quite the dramatic effect that we were looking for. Harsh, I found the voice to be quite familiar, and the endless screaming that followed not long after the incident called out to me. Within minutes I was at the service of this new company. They told me much information that could stand a fair trial against those who built the Ferris wheel. But I didn’t press charges, I knew they’d tell me she was meaningless.
There are times where I’m willing to underline words that have meaning. Although, I don’t quite find much use in linking words together.
- 7 8 7 2 6 –
These numbers were underlined in what appeared to be my travelling journal. I never shared this with you, I’d never want you to know what kind of business I was involved in. Most of my jobs were all set up to become a major plotting point. I kid you not that this is just a story. None of this is to be taken seriously.
Seven, it’s the number that I first underlined from the first week of the party. Eight, it’s the digit that I didn’t want to share at the party. Seven, it’s just another copy of the first digit that I underlined. Two, I’m certain that there were two incidents that caused me to do what I had to. Six, it’s the first digit to the Devil. I’m not satanic, but I do have quite the feelings for a dark undertone. Oh, wait… I remember how our mother would tell us that the dark undertone complimented the figure. It got me thinking back to just that; figures. Digits.
Susan’s got herself out of bed again, I’m no longer needed to put the sheets over her. It’s weird as I’ve seen others take advantage of the wrapping. Gift wrapping was part of December, but I didn’t share the same cheer as everyone else.
Around this time, I had lost interest in everything around me. The crying girl behind me was just an image in the back of my memories. I don’t recall ever looking the other way, but I’ve got a feeling I watched her that night. Just like how she once watched over me, I had to make sure that the night would be full of surprises. If I was to tell them that there will never be any more surprises around this joint. They’d call on me to ascend the stairs that I dare not to go near.
Just an hour from the actual time that I told you about. That flashback, that memory was just a constant reminder that I wasn’t just a number. I’m not a name that’s been underlined for delivery. I’m essential to whatever it is that they have planned around this place. Whatever the situation, I’m still left with thoughts. Just when I thought I had really removed the back of my mind, I feel like the cold drought is still getting in without my permission. They used to put up firewalls to block out unwanted business. But I found a hack that got me behind their wall, and that’s what led me to believe that this is my final hour.
Welcome back, did you miss me? I’m now sitting in the chair again. Sometimes I watch the lights flicker on, and then off without any reason to do so. I know it’s not automatic, it’s manually controlled by whoever’s behind the curtains. Look to my right with my two eyes focused on an individual place. I look into that void and I see the mindless; the stupid, the crazy, and the weird. Not one of them looks through the curtains trying to see whether I’m alive or not.
Alert, I’ve told the system that it’s being overridden for bugs inspection. Nobody got the hint when I first announced that the hack was simply a way to bypass the broken. It wasn’t long until they called me forward, and I witnessed the woman of my dreams be decapitated by a katana. Just like the blade that I watched cut through hundreds of innocent children. This monster, this creature behind a mask was not going to threaten me. I’m not going to allow it to bypass my system, and if it gets to meet you? You better run.
‘It’s over there’- I remember being told that when I was just five years old. Dad had the firewood ready for another great bonfire. And then we had to watch out the window through the cold blizzards that entered our neighbourhood. Throughout the snowy regions, I could see the mindless. Granted, I was five years old with no knowledge on what the mindless were. Susan’s father filled me in on the details a few years later. Prior to the recent events, I found myself lost within the whiteness that contained shipments of other chemicals. It all contained the vitamins, and the essential codes and threads that we wished for upon a star.
OUT OF TIME
Okay, in that case we go backwards. Then when we’ve got enough juice in the system, the tanks; we go forwards proceeding onto our next advancement. If time is running out for us, I suggest that we use a stronger tank that will contain even the most depressing of old timers. If you think, there’s ever going to be enough fuel in the system to operate the functions. You are mistaken, there will never be enough time to fix what is broken.
RESET. I’ve reset the system so I can have a talk with you. It’s obvious by now that you’re aware of my conditions. You know how I’m trapped in the same chair that’s held me back for weeks, months, and even years. I’ve spent more time rotting away in this chair than you have thinking for me. But I want to make one thing clear to you, I did everything for a reason. I know why time is low on delivery schedules. It’s because YOU are afraid of what is to come. You can no longer stand the fact that all of this is going to end up crumbling beneath you.
The entire setup along with the system that’s held you in my head for lifetime. It’s now clear that you are no longer needed within my memories. I’m willing to hold you back, and I’ll strangle the life out of you. Any time I can make up for losing all those people that had more than enough reasons to live. You’ve taken advantage of the system itself, and you’ve wired yourself to the machine.
Beep, Beep, Beep
“Susan? I’m sorry, I could never have saved you. There was never enough time to save you.”
“We’re losing him, it’s not going to be as easy as you said, Keith.”
“Don’t blame me,” the voice wouldn’t leave me alone. “Blame those who tried to enter this poor man’s mind.”
“Wires, connections, circuitry?” He huffed, “what is the meaning of all this?”
“It’s now starting to look like you will never believe what happens next.”
“I believe that we’re losing him.”
“Exactly, and I now believe that you’re wasting his time.”
“What are you doing with those?!”
“It’s what has to be done in order to fix this man’s mind.”
“Sorry, I’m sorry you had to witness this. I’m sorry you had to watch what I never wanted you to see, son.”
Time is now reset.
I’ve now got more than enough time to save her.
If only I had known that time would remind me of why I lost her in the place.
Time is now frozen.
November . . .