Looking for Yesterday

"Looking for Yesterday." Bobby Wray returns to the North East after an absence of fifteen years. After the sudden death of his father. he has been estranged from his mother since he discovered her affair. He stays with his sister Maggie and she tries to get him to build bridges with his mother when the truth is revealed about his father.


3. 3

In 1969 she fell pregnant again with twins but your twin brother died; still born.’

The unbiblical chord choked him mam said.’

“Charlie is buried in Preston Cemetery.’ Mam still goes to the grave and puts flowers there every August on your birthdays.

“Charlie would have been twenty six this year.’

“Who was the eldest of us then?’

“You were by five and a half minutes.’ We got clothes passed down from our Aunt Maureen and Irene because mam couldn’t afford to buy us new clothes. I was fifteen before I was able to buy my own clothes.

“I was running around in our Rachel’s old clothes for years and you in your cousin Tommy’s. Mam and dad fought constantly because dad liked to go for a pint in the Ridges Inn with his mates and he would come back drunk and hit mam.

“What my father hit my mother?’

“Yes many times; I think dad was beating her because he did not feel anything for mam and married her out of convenience rather than love. He resented mam’s parents because they kept interfering in mam’s affairs. They berated him publicly for going to the pub; so to get back at them he did it all the more.’ Frankie Dillon, the man you caught mam with had always loved mam. Ever since they played snowball fights in Queen Victoria Junior School. He was a shy boy then and my mother was a right Tom boy in those days and played mostly with all the lads in the street. She would tell me how they played “Tin a Block” and “Knock door neighbour” They would go sledging down Tanners Bank and she would be the driver of the bogey that Frankie had made for her. She nearly got them both killed when they just missed a fish lorry that came hurtling around the corner from the Wooden Doll Tavern. Then when Frankie was seventeen he joined the Royal Navy; He wrote to mam every week; she kept the letters and showed them to me. It was obvious that both my mam and Frankie were in love but that one night with dad changed everything. Frankie wanted to marry mam and Frankie and dad had a fight. Frankie knocked dad out cold; he was the Navy Light heavyweight boxing champion and he was bigger than dad.’

Mam told Frankie that she was pregnant with Dad and that hurt Frankie a lot. He never contacted mam for a long time after that; then they bumped into each other in North Shields. The went for a cup of tea in Peggy’s Cafe on Saville Street and all the old feelings came back. Frankie asked mam to leave dad. Mam was scared as dad had sworn to kill Frankie if he ever saw him again.’

“He would meet mam every time he was on leave and it was inevitable that the love they had for each other was growing stronger; they would end up in bed together and that’s what was happening the day you came home and caught them both.’

“Well the rest you know Bobby.

“What I will say is this Bobby, everything has two sides; two perspectives. Mam and Frankie were like two waves driving towards the shore; they crashed into one another during that journey. Then they were washed away to sea. The waves spent a long time trying to find each other again and they did and then they were joined together on the floating tide.’

The Lorry took the junction for Leeds and Booby told Maggie that he would see her soon. The service station was only two miles away he was choking for a cup of tea.

He increased his speed to seventy miles per hour in an effort to get to the service station quicker. In just a few minutes he was turning into the car park and parked up.

He knew all the staff and he loved the fry ups they made there.


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