(Listen to livewire by Oh Wonder)
I've been lying in my bed for about two days.
I haven't been eating, drinking, or talking.
My own parents haven't even talked to me or checked on me.
'Such great parents,' I say to myself.
It's a never-ending cycle of being sad, angry, and neutral.
I know the boys are leaving soon, and I won't be able to see them again for a very long time.
I check my phone again
22 missed calls from Michael
14 missed calls from Luke
9 missed calls from Calum
15 missed calls from Ashton
50 missed calls from Emily
and lots of texts.
I put my pillow over my face and scream.
Everything was perfectly fine
and then everything went to hell.
I was at my peak and now I'm at my low point.
I look at my phone again, unlocking it.
My thumb hovers over the green call button.
I press it, immediately regretting my decision.
It goes straight to voicemail.
The phone beeps and I hang up.
I throw my phone across the room out of anger and it instantly shatters.
I am completely broken.
Nothing can fix me.
Not even Michael.
He can't even be my livewire.