The next time she sees them, she can't look them in the eyes. Something alike to a great cliff creates a distance so far, that even looking upon them feels impossible.
So imagine the surprise she gets when they jump the distance.
,,We need to talk," they say one day, and in seconds she feels her heart in her throat, mind thundering down things like no, they'll say they'll hate me, that I need to never talk to them again, that I need to never look at them again and I can't-
,,Easy," they whisper, and it's something short and simple and she looks at them, eyes a scared mess she can't find her way in.
,,I can't," she finally says, body becoming something relaxing and tense at the same time. She finally said it – and now what?
They say nothing, only looks at her and waits, eyes filled with something she doesn't dare put a word on.
,,I can't be easy. I can't be calm. I can't be something easy. I'm-"
,,No, stop," they say, and as usual their words are so soft she almost wants to cry, because they make everything seem so easy despite the screaming in her head.
,,I don't care about what you are," and the words are harsh, but there's nothing in that sentence that makes her feel at unease or that's something's wrong.
,,I know you carry a lot of things in there," their hand reach out, a gentle brush again her brow and she leans towards the touch
,,But I want to be a part of it. Not because it excites me or I'm curious. There's something about you...", they look at her, eyes rich and wide, and despite their look swallows her whole, she feels completely calm.
,,That makes me unable to stay away."
She figures she can't breathe, but for once, she really doesn't mind. They smile now, and she somehow smiles back despite the way her heart feels like it's hurling out of her chest, but that's not the point:
They are here.
And they want to stay.
Their hands slide down her arms, and she feels her skin tingle all the way down, a sensation she wouldn't mind be all over her body. When their hands reach hers, they intertwine quietly and she doesn't think she's ever been so sure on something in her life.
They lean down towards her, and she instantly tenses up and feel like pulling away, but they stop right where she doesn't think she can take it anymore, something that makes her exhale easily.
,,Will you tell me?", they ask, and she can't help the smile that spreads across her lips, carrying stars and oceans in her eyes.
,,Yes. Yes I will."
She doesn't want to stay away from the paper, but she tries, so insanely, and almost succeeds.
,,What if they leave," she asks and the paper doesn't answer as always. Her skin tingles and then she rises, putting away the pen with wide eyes.
She's panting, almost as if she's just run a marathon, and she keeps feeling the pull and so she turns and runs.