It's all my fault (Ashton Irwin)

It's all my fault. It's all my fault that my mom died when I was nine. It's all my fault that my dad abuses me. It's my fault that nobody like me at school. It's my fault everyone wants me dead. The only good thing that I have in my life is my brother Sam. Or so I thought was the only good thing. Hi. My name is Jay and I'm going to tell you why it's all my fault.


11. Another beating

Jay's POV:


It has only been two days since I got the note form Ella. I still went to school with Ashton. I know Sam has to get used to this idea of me walking with a guy and hanging out with a guy. I noticed that he's been acting a bit different since out talk. I mean, I have too. I haven't eaten that much or slept. I just keep thinking about that note. I know that Ashton said that he wouldn't leave me but I just have a feeling he will. Like my last boyfriend Jacob. Yea I forgot to mention that. I told him everything that happened and he just left. I guess I'm just too much.

I get home from school and my dad is home. Shit. "Jay get over here now!" he spats at me. I take a deep breath knowing that it's time for a beating. *I'm not going into details about the beating.*

"Dad what the fuck?" I hear Sam yell. "Sam stop it. Jay needs to learn that it's not OK TO KILL YOUR FAMILY! ESPECIALLY YOUR MOTHER!" he yells at me. I just sit there and cry as I'm reminded of what Iv'e done. "Dad Jay didn't kill mom. All she wanted was ice cream. Is that bad that a little girl wanted ice cream? It wasn't her fault that some fucking asshole shot her. So I think you can leave Jay the fuck alone and stop beating her or I'll call the cops." Sam yells. I see my dad stare at Sam with pure rage and anger. "Go ahead dad. Hit me. Punch me or kick me. Just don't ever touch Jay again." Sam says very seriously. He walks over to me while staring my dad down. He lifts me up off the floor and helps me to his room. He sits me on his bed and gets a paper towel and peroxide. I just sit there and cry like a hopeless baby. Sam puts the towel with peroxide on me legs and arms and I almost scream and the intense burning. I lift up my shirt so he can do the same to my stomach. It's not weird for us at all. "Fuck this hurts almost as bad as when dad actually did it." I say. "Jay, I'm so sorry for what he's done. If he ever touches you I swear I will call the cops." he says "Sam I don't know what I would ever do without you. And it's going to suck when your away at college. I love you so much." I say. He pulls me into a hug and says, "Hey I'm not going that far. Just ten hours away." he says. We talk for a bit more and put on a movie in his room. In the middle of the movie I find my thoughts drifting towards Ashton again. I suddenly fall asleep.

Hi xx Please let me know if you like this story and if I should keep going. I love you all. Stay strong xx

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