invisible // muke

"You've made me feel so much happiness and I don't want to ever leave that happiness." It's March 22, 2013; our one month. A moment I'll cherish forever and a moment I'll never forget.

There are mentions of self harm, suicide, abuse, and depression. If you have any of these problems and just need someone to talk to, my inbox is always open ❤️


22. addict with a pen // twenty one pilots

It felt like time slowed down for a few moments as it all happened. I'm sure I look worried as I'm singing the end of the song. As soon as the song was over, I had the urge to run off stage. I stopped myself, though, to tell the fans that we'll be back. I rush off the stage, going straight to Michael as the stage crew was helping him. All I could see was the pain he was in. It made me so upset to see that. I haven't seen him in this much pain in almost a year.
"We don't know how bad it is, Michael. We need to get you an ambulance." One of the sage crew members were trying to talk to him. He was refusing to go back to the hospital. I go over to Michael, taking his free hand.
"Michael, you need to go. We don't know how bad the burn is. You have to. I know you don't want to, but you have to." I say quietly to him. He nods, his lip quivering and tears pouring from his eye that isn't covered by a cold and wet towel. I just want him to be okay.

"See. That wasn't that bad." Ashton smiles at Michael who is sitting on our bed at the hotel. We just got back from the hospital and they said he'll recover fine. They put purple bandages around his face with some cooling cream for the burns. The bright purple of the bandage stands out against his messy black hair. Michael smiles.
"Now I can say that I've survived yet another stage accident." He laughs as he tweets the fans a picture, letting them know he'll be okay. Michael is very clumsy on stage. He's always accidentally getting hurt. I worry about him sometimes. He started getting therapy before this tour. I'm usually the one who takes him. He says he feels better after every visit. Sometimes he comes out with tear stained cheeks and a smile, and sometimes he comes out crying and completely upset still. There hasn't been an appointment where he hasn't cried. I love how it's helping him a lot, but I hate how it's making him cry. The silence the three of us were sitting in is filled when Ashton yawns and Calum snores. Calum fell asleep as soon as we got back to the room. I giggle quietly at Calum as Ashton rolls his eyes.
"I guess we could use some sleep for tomorrow." Ashton chuckles lightly, climbing into bed next to Calum. He turns off their side table light. I turn off ours, turning around to see that Michael was still sitting up in bed, he's smiling as he scrolls through his twitter. I move closer to him, smiling as I read some of the tweets. I put my head on his shoulder, reading the tweets as he scrolled through them. He stops scrolling, kissing the top of my head gently.
"I love you." He says happily and then continues to scroll.
"I love you too." I smile, taking his free hand. I could never express enough how much I really love Michael. He's my other half and without him, I don't know what I'd be. I'd probably be a lost soul. Soon enough after a few minutes, Michael turns off his phone as I'm slowly falling asleep on his shoulder.
"Hey, Lukey. How about you lay down and go to sleep? Okay?" He says quietly, gently lifting me from his shoulder.
"What about you?" I ask.
"I'll be fine." He smiles at me, kissing my forehead. I move down the bed a little, laying my head in his lap, curling up on my side. Michael covers me with the blanket, playing with my hair and brushing it back with his hand. I quickly fall asleep to his gentle touch.

I wake up laying on my back, my head near my pillow. Michael's head was laying on my stomach, curled up just like I was last night when I fell asleep. I smile. He's so cute when he's asleep. I look over at the clock to see that it's 11:00 am. Cal and Ash are sitting in bed on their phones. Calum looks over at us, smiling.
"That's so cute" He chuckles quietly. Ashton looks up from his phone and then smiles at me.
"It is." Ashton smiles.
"Do you know what time he ended up going to bed?"I ask, kind of confused as to why he isn't up before me. Oddly enough, he's one of those people who gets up to make breakfast before their significant other wakes up. I look over and Calum shrugs. 
"I got up around 3:30 to pee and he was still up. He said he couldn't sleep because of the bandages." Ashton frowns slightly. I frown, gently brushing the hair away from the bandages. I just look at him in awe thinking about how amazing he is.
"You really love him, don't you?" Calum asks, smiling at us again. I nod.
"A lot." I pause for a moment. "I love him a lot." I smile even more than I was before.
"I'm glad you're happy. You make him really happy and you can tell." Ashton smiles at me. I nod, looking down at the sleeping human in front of me.
"I really want to ask him to marry me. But I'm not sure when there's a good time to do it." I mumble slightly so then if he was waking up, he probably wouldn't know what we are talking about.
"Do it when you feel it's right. Don't rush into it okay? You guys have been together for almost two and a half years. That's pretty long considering you guys used to fight a lot while on tour." Ashton says, shutting off his phone, setting it in his lap. 
"Maybe at three years." I say almost to myself. We fall into a silence until Cal gets up to go shower and Ash turns on the TV to the news.

It's about 12:30 and I've managed to get out from underneath Michael so I could shower. When I come back out, Michael is still asleep in the same spot I left him in. I sigh, going over to him and kissing his nose, hopefully getting him to wake up.
"Wake up sleepy head. You have to get ready." I chuckle quietly as he groans, rolling over and facing away from me. I crawl onto the bed, sitting behind him and rubbing his back and shoulders. "Baby, you have to get up. You can't sleep all day. We have a show tonight." Michael rolls back over, facing me with a tired smile on his face.
"Okay." He yawns.
"I'll go retake a shower with you." I smirk slightly and he jumps up almost immediately, going to get ready for a shower. I love how that works every time.

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