I held onto my stuffed bear as I watched my mom and brother pack their bags. I begged, cried, and pleaded for them not to leave me, but nothing worked. My mom knelled down in front of me. I remember her eyes were filled with broken promises and lies, but she played it off so well. She stroked my wild, blonde hair and smiled.
"We'll be back before you know it sweetheart" She whispered. I felt her soft hand on my forehead, pushing my hair back. Her warm lips against my head. I wrapped my arms around her and softly cried. I didn't want her to go. She hugged me too, tighter than ever before. That's how I knew she wasn't coming back.
My brother, Riley, ran his long, nimble fingers through his dark brown hair and sighed. He resembled my mother, more than he did my father. Their tan skin, dark hair, and soft features. But me on the other hand, I resembled my father. Pale skin, white hair, and defined features. Riley looked down at me and bit his lip. He knew what was going on, but he didn't want me to worry about it. He wiped the depression off of his face and gave me a cheerful look.
"It's okay Hazy I'll be back" He said as he ruffled my hair. I smiled and gave him my teddy bear. He looked at me in shock, but then smiled softly. "Thanks Haze, I love you so much" He added and kissed my forehead.
They both stood and glanced at each other. Then my dad then scooped me up because he knew I would try to run after them. I began to cry once again but it didn't faze anyone. Riley and mom, hand in hand, walk out of the door. After a few minutes pass, I hear a car screeching and running into something. I begin to cry louder. My dad runs his hands through my hair. He knew what their plan was, and never stopped them. He takes me outside when a neighbor comes banging on the door. I notice the bags they packed are still lying on the patio, along with my teddy bear. And at the age of five, I witnessed my brother and mom, commit suicide.
* End Of Flashback *
I hug my knees while rocking back and forth. Clenching my eyes shut , I whisper to myself.
"Its okay, its okay, its okay" I whisper quietly to myself as my dad rushes into my room. He kneels down beside my bed and softly pulls my hands away from my knees. He takes a deep breath as he stands up. He's probably annoyed with having to do this every night. I mean I am 17, but the nightmares are still the same from when I was a kid. It hurts so bad to think about it. On top of that, the boy I've been talking to, now hates my soul. For what reason, I will never know. But it hurts just to be abandoned like that again. But, I guess I totally deserve it.
"Haze, calm down" He whispers as he carries me in his arms towards the living room.
"I-I had the dream again dad, I'm sorry" I stammered.
"Its okay, honey" He responded as he sat down in his rocking chair. He rocked back and forth slowly, which calmed me down. "Its okay" He says while kissing my forehead. "Its okay" He says softly.