1. Chapter 1
I've known Jack since the beginning of seventh grade. We've been best friends ever since. I didn't know it then but I loved Jack with all my heart. I didn't know that he was going to be my best friend let alone my boyfriend and I most certainly didn't know he could break my heart like this.
Today it was raining ever since the sun rose. It explains what I'm feeling at the moment. Sad and empty. I didn't know someone could just do something like that so carelessly. But that's all apart of the game isn't it. You make them fall in love, you cheat, you break up the other moves on while the other thought you had everything. We were perfect Jack and I. I never thought he would do that. I know he tried to explain why he did it but to be honest I knew this was going to happen one day I just didn't think it would happen so soon.
I remember him pleading for me to come back. I remember his 'sorry'. He said that he didn't mean it he was forced but why do something like this? He didn't have to kiss her. He didn't have to but he did. I wouldn't be upset if it was just a kiss but no it always has to be more. She was in our bed fooling around with him. He was having sex in our bed with another person. How could someone do that? How? He tried explaining but I didn't listen. I didn't want to hear the bullshit he had to say. To be honest at that point I didn't care. I left I told him to never come back to this house under any circumstances. I remember taking that mattress and burning it. I remember sleeping on the couch and crying for months. We were each other's worlds or maybe he was just mine.
I never meant to hurt Alex. Only if he let me explain what happened. Not a day goes by where I don't think about him. Every second I'm awake every second I'm sleeping every second I'm living Alex is on my mind. At this point you can say I've gone mental or maybe a little insane but I need him I want him back. I'll do anything. She told me if I didn't listen to her she could hurt Alex really bad. Possibly kill him. Any time any day she could kill him and that's what scared me. I wouldn't want him to die so I did what she wanted me to do. Alex didn't let me explain. I've tried calling, texting, getting others to tell him my side of the story but he never listened. The other day I saw him at the store and I 'accidentally' bumped into him. He looked at me and for a split second I saw that he missed me. What hurt me most was the pained look on his face. "Alex..." I said. "Go leave me alone." And once he said that he walked off. I tried running after him but he was too fast. Oh Alex... I'm so sorry.
I saw him at the store. I remember the look on his face. He needed me back he looked broken. He was my world and he thinks I would let him in so carelessly. No. As much as I miss him I've lost all trust in him. ALL OF IT. I miss him. He looked as if he was going to break down. "Alex..." He said. My name never sounded more beautiful than when he said it. It always sounded perfect. But I couldn't fall back so easily. "Go leave me alone." I was on the verge of tears. I ran I forgot about what I was trying to buy. I got in my car. GOD DAMMIT JACK!!! I slammed on my wheel. I missed him so much and I almost let him back in. Almost. I've longed for him for so long I guess I'm still to vulnerable. Fuck him. I started to drive home. He sent me a text. He said I miss you we need to talk let me explain. What is there left to explain? He cheated. There is nothing to explain. He's lucky I don't have the willpower to ignore him.