When I woke up, I checked my phone.it was 4:00 am. I felt light breathing on my neck. It was Jenna sleeping beautifully on me. I have never felt so happy. She made me feel loved and cared for. I love this feeling. I have never felt so loved.
I placed her on the floor slowly. I got up and held her in my arms. As I was carrying her to her room she started talking in her sleep. " Ashton.......changed"
Is she really dreaming about me? Wow! I can't help but smile.
I gently place her small fragile body on her bed. As I'm about to lay down on the floor I hear her tired yet still beautiful voice say " Ashton can you please sleep with me? I feel alone." "Sure beautiful." Stop it I'm not beautiful." "Yes you are" I said as I laid down next to her. "Whatever Ashy" I blushed a little at the nick name. I cuddle in front of her and placed her head on my chest. " I love the smell of your cologne" she said sleepily. I chuckled a bit and fell asleep.
When I woke up,Ashton was gone. I hope he will still be nice to me at school. He's a totally different person when he is out of school. I still wonder why he bullies me. Is his reason really going to be that selfish? I'm just like that I will forgive I just won't forget. It's like I forgave Michael,but I will never forget that he did bully me. I look down at my arms and see the fresh cuts in my skin. Remembering how I passed out before Ashton came in my house. Now realize that I cry but not because it hurts. I cry because it doesn't hurt. It doesn't remind me that even after all the hell I've been through I'm still alive. I hope he doesn't forget the conversation..... The kiss we shared last night
I quickly get ready for school and walk out the door. I'm walking to school like any normal day in the morning. When I get to the front door I see them. I see Luke, Calum,and...and Ashton. They were hurting........ Michael. My only friend.
J: "Leave him alone!" I screamed, tears forming in my eyes. I didn't dare to let them fall. Ashton looked at me with sadness in his eyes. I can't believe him. Everything that happened last night.... Did he forget?
L: " Ashton look at who's here."
M: " Jenna leave, I'm fine."
J: "you're obviously not fine!"
L: " Ashton go hurt her!" He said with an evil grin from ear to ear.
M: " Ashton don't do it. Ashton you're better than that and you know it." He said his voice came out a bit strained from the pain.
He came at me. His eyes were unreadable. I could usually read those eyes so easily but, I can't. I know he's having fun. He likes seeing people in pain. Especially me.
As I was in the middle of thinking if to run or to just fuck life and stay there, I saw his fist coming straight to my face. The hands that cuddled with me last night hurting me once again. I don't know why I'm so surprised. This should be normal. But you know what's not normal him kissing you,cuddling with you, having a normal conversation with you and then the next day abused you like as if every single word I said meant nothing to him.
With that punch I was on the ground but still completely conscious. I felt his foot go deep into my belly. I yelped in pain. I don't know why but it hurts more emotionally than it does physically. He took my wrists in his hands and put a lot of pressure on them. He knows about the cuts obviously he would do that.he looked me in the eyes as he did so. I looked into his beautiful eyes that I had to stop calling beautiful and cried. It doesn't hurt when I do it or when someone else does it but when Ashton does it it hurts a lot. I guess that someone you started falling for does it hurts because you didn't expect them to ever hurt you or at least not any more.
He punched me one last time in the face. I fell back once more holding my bloody wrists in my hand. The fresh blood running down my hands like a running faucet.
M: " Ashton what the fuck Is wrong with you? Luke really did get in your brain. You took it to far. Do you really have to that to her wrist man. Don't you think her hurting herself wasn't enough. I think the Ashton I knew....my brother is far gone."
What the fuck did I just do! Luke had to fucking ruin it. No this isn't Luke fault. This is all my fault because I had the choice to not hurt her but I did it anyways.
I saw the tears in her eyes. She looked at me.
J: " I guess that everything that happened last night didn't mean anything to you. The conversation we had. The hugs we shared. The kiss we shared. That meant nothing to you. I thought you changed Ashton. Me being the nice person that you say I am I believed you. I trusted you. You decided to give me another reason why not to trust you and worst of all another reason why not to fall for you ever again. Aye, but it's okay I gave up on myself too a long time ago." She said the tears falling from her beautiful brown eyes that I loved looking into. I can easily read her eyes you could see the pain and the hurt in her beautiful eyes.
A: " no, will never forget about that night."
J: " If you never forgot than why is it that you hurt me?"
A: " I don't have an answer to that Jenna."
J: "you never have an answer,Ashton. I'm just gonna leave." She said the make up that was on her eyes running down her face from the tears.
M: " you fucked up Ashton. You are never getting her back. You will never be able to forget her and the tears you made her eyes let go of."
I looked at him and realized that Luke and Calum had left already.
A: " I lost her Michael and I will never be able to get her back." I said as my tears that I was trying to hold back fell from my eyes.
M: "look Ashton crying isn't going to make it better. You need to run after her and say sorry. Jenna will one day forgive you. She forgave me and I bullied her and now we are good friends. I will always regret ever bullying her. By the way why was she talking about some kiss!? Did you guys kiss are you serious? She kissed you and you bully her so Im pretty sure she will forgive you."
A: " that kiss man...It was magical...I've never felt the same with another girl. I love her."
M: "Did you just say you love her?!"
I was shocked at my own words. I've never loved anyone.she managed to steal my heart.
A: " I don't know where that came from but I guess I do. I can't stop thinking about last night. She slept in my arms. The way she cuddled into my chest and I swear I lost it when she did. She even dreamed about me she mumbled in her sleep. She said "Ashton.....Changed". Omg and I just let her down. I need to go after her. See you later Michael!"
A/n: sorry for the short chapter.thanks to Angel Irwin. You remind me to do better in every chapter from all your amazing comments reminding me to update❤️❤️❤️