29. 'Un peu noyé dans la fumée'
It's not like I didn't at least try. I did, I even had my first kiss with a guy I didn't really like, which I wouldn't mind except I don't think it was a good kiss so that kind of sucks.
I mean I don't for one minute think that you still like me but that's because I can't understand how you can, the again, I still like you so perhaps you feel the same. I don't know. I just wish you would tell me the truth. If I always like you, if you make me compare everyone to you then I will never be happy, will I?
I also think, why should you like me? I'm a complete dick. Or I could be... I can be so mean and rude, but I try not to be. Does that make me less of a dick?
I just want to talk to you but it would be so weird if I just popped up to you. I hate how I left things. I wish I could tell you that I'm an idiot and it was all my fault and I wish I had never had said anything about anything to you. You probably know I'm an idiot. You probably don't care about the rest.
Paradis Perdus - Christine and the Queens