“Look at the stars, “he told me as we lay on the grass at the edge of the city.
For once, it was quiet and calm with no screaming and the thought of war, distant in our minds. It was just the two of us, gazing into the darkness, alone but yet together. Mystically swaying in the darkness of the night, the trees elegantly danced above us, rustling in the light breeze. The moment was perfect. We were perfect and the conflict seemed to be forgotten for a precious few moments.
“They’re so elegant,” I remarked as streaks of light ran across the edge of my vision. They flickered for a few moments before fading into the black which engulfed the sky. As I turned to look at his face, I saw him smile for the first time since the war began all those months ago. We lived on different sides of the boarder and after war broke out, our relationship was forbidden and dangerous. But he didn’t care and neither did I. I wanted to be with him and so I’d run away from my life and my home, across the battlefield to the one place that I wanted to be; with him.
He laced is fingers through mine as the blankets of dark emeralds cushioned us from the hard ground below. A warm feeling seemed to spark inside of me as his eyes met mine for an endless moment. A warm feeling of joy, a feeling of love which I had never truly experienced before seemed to wash over my every thought. We were on different sides of the war; our love was wrong and forbidden.
A sense of clarity as well as floods of thoughts overwhelmed me as I stole a deep breath. Moments this perfect were not to be rushed or wasted but cherished and enjoyed. Underneath my false mask, I knew the truth about the war and all of the lies. But in that moment as I bathed in the cold glow of moonlight, everything was still and calm. I could almost believe that there was peace again and we were no longer victims of terror and conflict.
I felt a slight smile crawl across my face as time continued to slowly pass by. Looking at the boy whose eyes were fixed on the stars only made me feel jealous. He was so innocent and free but yet I was still a captive in the arms of despair. I didn’t want to admit it to myself but I had fallen in love with him and his way of life. There would be no more running, no more pain and no more deception. That was something I could live with.
“Can I stay here? On your side?” I asked, my nerves seeping into my voice. I didn’t want to go back to the battlefield; I wanted to stay where I was and live my life with the boy I loved. We were on different sides of the war but that didn’t mean that I didn’t love him. We were so different in our lives and belief but I knew the bond we shared was eternal and I knew that he felt the same.
“Of course, I’d love that.”
A cloud of grey mist rapidly spread over the sky, hiding the image from our sight.
“You’re beautiful, you know that?” I blushed as he leaned closer to me until our eyes were only centimetres apart. For a never ending moment, we just looked at each other, gazing longingly into each other’s eyes. As our lips touched, a burst of warmth rippled through my body. A feeling of love filled my heart as I softly pulled away.
“I love you…”
Sharing a moment of pure tranquillity, the empty feeling in my chest was gone now replaced with a spark of hope. No matter what who won the war, I knew that everything would turn out okay and in the end, I would have the happy ending that I had always dreamed of.
Little did I know how wrong I was…
Gently brushing my fingers over the cold metal, the pendant that he’d given me so long ago felt heavy around my neck. Tears rolled down my cheeks as I spoke to the stone which had his name engraved on it.
“Why? Why did you have to come back for me? I told you to run!” I choked on my words, falling to the ground in defeat. “Why did you come back for me?” I knew the answer. He said that he loved me and he meant it. The war took everything from me, even the one thing that I was sure I’d never lose. He’d given his life for mine, which only made me love him all the more. Would I have done the same? I doubt it but he had given everything for me to live. Fate was cruel, taunting me with what I could never have by making me want it all the more.
I lay down onto the grass, my hand resting on the side of his gravestone. My mind fell back to the night where it all began, the night where everything changed. Whispering the words into the darkness, the empty feeling in my chest faded for a few moments.
“Look at the stars,” I told him, only this time, this time I was alone.