Day 29, 15/05/2018
So now i've wrote you everyday in 29 days, and i don't think i can stop in the nearest future,
I actually don't miss, or i do miss you, but i feels stronger like something inside of me is
trying to kill me, i have never regretted anything more than i regret what i did to you.
We never met or talked, and i still feel like i've heard your laugh, your voice, and
i still feel like i've had my arms around you.
sometimes i wonder how it could went that wrong, when we met in 2015 i'd never imagined that you
would end up meaning everything to me, and i don't know
if i was wrong, honestly i had trouble writing how much i love you
cause it felt so real, but still so much like a dream,
i wasn't quite sure if you really existed, you could have been somebody
else than u pretented to be.. but i know you are that cute little giggly girl
who are just whoever she wanna be,
and i'm so sorry i kinda couldn't handle helping you and i did all
the wrong things, but you never left me because of that and it was like
you realized that it was me you wanted, and i was an idiot and got
another "girlfriend" in between because i couldn't handle you being so
happy without me.. which i realized you wasn't
we had some problems, and i could probably have solved them
if i was just brave enough, but i wasn't well..
i was kinda mad at you.. but not in a way you deserved..
you made me so jealous and i though you would leave me
what i didn't realieze was that the moment..
it all went that way, you left,
and never came on again and you wrote;
"what a stupid lamb. " - Bella (our qoute)
I'll always love you, Eli
That was your last words.
can't handle this writing right now.. i don't know why i cry over you
i never cry..
/your dearest, forever boy <3
what do you guys think?
hope you like it ;D