“Run!” The snake hit the Doctor again, this time knocking Lilith back too.
Ace ran to what looked like an escape hatch. “Doctor, it's a dead end!” The door closed, trapping her inside. Lilith ran her hands around the wall, looking for some sort of trigger to open the door.
“Hang on, Ace!” the Doctor yelled. “I'm coming!”
Water flooded into the escape hatch. Ace was screaming for the Doctor and hammering on the door. The water was up to her chin. The snake hits the Doctor again, knocking him out.
“For Rassilon’s sake, Dad. We don’t have time for this!” Lilith put her fingers on the Doctor’s temples. His eyes snapped open and he helped him up.
The Doctor stumbled over to a control panel and pulled out a small pyramid with seaweed attached to the bottom. Ace was ejected out through the top of the escape hatch.
Lilith stepped in front of the Doctor protectively, but the snake knocked the two of them down again, the piece of the control unit slipping for the Doctor’s hand. As he and Lilith scrambled to their feet, someone else stepped on the control unit. The snake vanished.
“I just can't let you out of my sight, can I, Doctor?” said a man in a green military uniform.
“Brigadier Alistair Gordon Lethbridge-Stewart, right?” Lilith said, brushing off her jeans.
“Yes, hello Collector,” the Brigadier replied.
“We’ve met?” she asked, eyes bright.
“When the Doctor was working with UNIT.”
“Ah, I look forward to meeting you then.”
The Doctor stood. “We best be getting back to the surface.”
Lilith nodded. “So, Brigadier, what exactly happened the first time we met?”
“Lilith!” the Doctor scolded. “Foreknowledge is dangerous.”
She held up her hands in surrender. “Fine, fine.”
As they climbed back through the tunnel, Lilith could hear the people outside talking. “But the Doctor is still down there,” Bambera’s voice said.
“And the Brigadier.”
“I am the Brigadier.”
“So am I.” The Brigadier stepped out of the tunnel.
Ace cocked her head to the side. “Hey, I thought it let you in but it doesn't let you out.
“It let me out,” the Doctor said, walking into the daylight with Lilith behind him.
“Brigadier, I thought you'd retired.” Bambera sounded surprised.
“So did I, Brigadier. Now, is the perimeter secure? This whole area is crawling with armed extra-terrestrials and they're hostile.”
“I wish this wasn’t my typical day.” Lilith sighed, climbing out of the hole. “But it is.”
The Brigadier, the Doctor, Lilith, Warmsly, Ace and Shou went to the Carbury Range Rover. “Oh, Bambera, take the other car, will you?” the Brigadier said.
“Yes, sir.” Bambera nodded. “Come on, Ancelyn. Looks like we get the deck chair.”
The Range Rover drove off. “We might run into trouble,” the Doctor warned.
“Oh really, Doctor? You do surprise me.”
Ace stuck her head out the window. “Winifred isn't following.”
The Brigadier frowned. “Good lord, is that her name?”
“Could be worse.” Lilith shrugged. “Could be something like Francis or Scootie. I met a Scootie once. Tragedy, really.”
‘You’re looking shifty, Dad,’ she thought. ‘What’s up?’
“Something's wrong,” he said aloud.
“What?” the Brigadier asked.
“We haven't been attacked yet.”
Before the Doctor could even finish his sentence, a grenade exploded next to the Range Rover. The vehicle swerved but kept going. Morgaine’s knights appeared from the trees and started shooting their blasters.
“Down!” the Brigadier shouted. He drove through two knights on the track. They shot out the rear window, but the Brigadier kept driving. Lilith shot each of them in the chest as they drove away.
“Are they gone?” Shou asked. “Who were they?”
“Space-age knights from Camelot.” Lilith blew a strand of hair out of her face. “There, we've been attacked. Happy, Dad?”
“Oh, good.” The Brigadier snorted.
“As long as Morgaine's people are shooting at us, she won't be using more obscure methods of attack.”
“I don't know, and I don't want to find out.”
The car pulled over and Ace got out to look around. “Professor, there's a whole pile of tinheads setting up on the road down there,” she said, looking through binoculars. She tossed them to the Doctor, who was on the roof of the car.
“Brigadier, tell Bambera she's in trouble.”
Lilith looked out the window at the smoke drifting between the tall pines nearby. “You sure we can’t help them?”
“Well, what do you want us to do?” the Brigadier said. “The area's swarming with Morgaine's troops.”
The Doctor shook his head, Lilith and Ace scowled.
“Better get back to the hotel.”
Ace got back into the Range Rover and they drove away, eventually reaching the inn where UNIT was setting up a base. Major Husak led Elizabeth out by the elbow to a truck before she shrugged him off.
“Everything under control?” the Brigadier asked one of the soldiers.
“No, sir,” the soldier said.
“Don't worry, Major. You'll soon get the hang of it. Oh, this is the Doctor. Yeah, well, don't let him baffle you.”
“It’ll just inflate his ego,” Lilith added.
“Yes, and this is the Collector and this is Peter Warmsly.”
“Ah, Mister Warmsly.” The Major checked his clipboard. “If you'd join Mister Rawlinson in the vehicle, we'll evacuate you from the area.”
“Excuse me, there are a few questions I want answered,” Pat insisted.
“And I have absolutely no intention of being evacuated,” Warmsly argued. “This area is where I live.”
The Doctor stepped forward. “You're very angry.”
“Of course we're angry.”
“And you want to leave.”
“No, we do not want to leave.”
The Doctor gave Pat a look, almost Oncoming Storm like. “Of course you want to leave.”
Pat blinked. “Of course we do.”
“I wouldn't stand for any nonsense, if I were you,” the Doctor added.
“Look, Doctor, the situation is perfectly simple. We are very angry and we—” Warmsly was cut off with the same look. “Want to leave. Is that right, Pat?”
“Don't get in our way.”
“Just no reasoning with these people.” Pat and Warmsly went to the truck.
Lilith raised her eyebrows at the Doctor. ‘What the hell was that?’
He just winked at her.
The Major cleared his throat. “At the risk of being baffled, sir, I have one more evacuee on my list. A young lady.”
Lilith noticed that Ace and Shou were nowhere in sight. “She seems to have disappeared.”
“Well, there you have it, Major,” the Brigadier said.
The Major saluted the Brigadier, then turned and reluctantly saluted the Doctor before leaving.
“You've got enough weapons here to fight a war,” the Doctor noted.
“That's the general idea,” the Brigadier agreed.
“It'll be useless, Brigadier.”
“Not this time, Doctor. Over here!” A soldier brought over a small ammunition box. The Brigadier took out a large bullet. “Armor piercing, solid core, with a Teflon coating. Go through a Dalek.”
Lilith whistled. “Could’ve used that in Utah.”
“UNIT's been very busy, Doctor. We've also got high-explosive rounds for Yetis and very efficient armor-piercing rounds for robots. And we've even got gold-tipped bullets for you know what.” Cybermen.
“No silver?” the Doctor smirked, walking away.
The Brigadier frowned. “Silver bullets?”
Lilith nodded. “Werewolves. Been there, done that.” He looked at her, disbelievingly. “No, seriously. 1879, Torchwood Estate. Got rid of a Lupine Wavelength Haemovariform threatening to kill Queen Victoria. She knighted us afterwards.”
“Dame Lilith of TARDIS at your service.” She jokingly saluted and skipped off into the inn where her father was in the bar area with Ace and Shou.
“Any idea what Morgaine’s ‘unconventional’ method of attack may be?” Ace asked.
Lilith plopped down on a chair. “Hopefully something that’ll be hurt by a headshot from my blaster,” she grumbled. “I hate things I can’t shoot at. They make me antsy.”
“Why not just shoot Morgaine?”
Lilith made a face. “I would if I could, but he’d never let me. Probably for the same reason Dad wouldn’t let me kill the Master. Morgaine’s after him, not me. Therefore, she’s his responsibility.”
“I’d rather you not shoot anyone,” the Doctor said.
“I bet you’d rather Ace not carry explosives around in her pocket, but that’s not going to happen, is it?”
“She’s got a point, Professor.”
The Brigadier came in. “Doctor! Bambera and Ancelyn are alive.”
The Doctor stood. “They're alive?”
“And Major Husak said they seem to be heading north from here.”
“Towards the missile convoy, then?” Lilith said.
“Yes. Bambera's own unit is there.”
“But if they lead Morgaine's troops…” He trailed off.
“It's a fully armed nuclear missile.”
Lilith rolled her eyes. “Now there’s something we want in the hands of a witch lady who’s trying to kill us.”
“We'd better stop any engagement,” the Doctor decided. “Have you got a helicopter available?”
“Oh, better than that, Doctor.” The Brigadier led them outside. A group of soldiers pulled a tarp off of a car. A yellow roadster with the license plate WHO7.
“Ah ha! Bessie!” the Doctor exclaimed.
“That’s definitely not what I was expecting,” Lilith chuckled.
“Well, I knew how fond of it you were.” The Brigadier shrugged. “So when you last went on your travels I had it put in mothballs.”
“Does it run on petrol or steam?” Ace laughed.
The Doctor looked at her seriously. “Ace, things may get dangerous, so I want you to have this.” He handed her something small and white.
“It looks like a piece of chalk,” she said.
“It is. I got it from the dartboard. But it will protect you against Morgaine's sorcery.”
“A piece of chalk?”
“A piece of chalk,” he confirmed. “At the first sign of anything strange, I want you to draw a chalk circle, and you and Shou Yuing stay inside it along with Excalibur.”
“Right, Professor. Chalk circle. Sure.”
“And remember, stay inside the circle. Don't leave it until I return.”
Ace frowned. “Doctor, you are coming back, aren't you?”
“Trust me,” the Doctor said, and then got in the car. “Ready, Brigadier?”
“Naught to sixty in twenty minutes,” Ace joked.
Shou smiled. “As fast as that?”
“Appearances can be deceiving, Ace.” The Doctor put a round device on the steering wheel and turned the lever. Then he started the engine. “And remember, look after Excalibur and stay in the circle.”
Bessie zoomed off, spitting gravel and leaving literally burning rubber behind. They drove down the paths and came to a stop just outside of the fighting. The Brigadier hung up the field phone he was using. “Doctor, I've just received the most peculiar from the hotel.”
“Does it say anything about Ace and Shou Yuing?” the Doctor asked.
“No. All it said was, night has fallen here.”
“’Cause that’s completely normal,” Lilith snorted.
“I'll deal with that later. First, I've got to put an end to this bloodshed.”
“And how would be go about doing that, Dad? Stand in the middle and shout stop?” the Time Lady suggested sarcastically.
“Good idea.” The Doctor marched towards the center of the battle.
Lilith gaped at him. “Dad! I wasn’t serious!” She chased after the Doctor, who was dead set on getting between the two knights shouting at each other.
Just as Mordred and Ancelyn raised their swords and were about to attack, the Doctor ran in shouting, “Stop! I command it! There will be no battle here!”
“This is no battle.” Mordred laughed. “Tis but a ruse, a diversion. My mother hath summoned the Destroyer, the Lord of Darkness, Eater of Worlds. Look to your children, Merlin, for soon they shall be no more.”
Lilith and the Doctor shared twin looks or horror. “Ace,” he breathed. “What have I done?”