If They Had Their Way

What if the Disney Villains succeeded? What would happen to the stories.


1. The Little Mermaid- If Ursula Had Her Way

Maybe I wasn't perfect in the past. Maybe I was a witch. Does that matter now? I don't think so!

Mama raised Triton, Poseidon, my twin sisters, and I to be royal while still being evil. She was like,"You never know when you'll need to take someone's soul."

I excelled in the arts that she taught us, and to her I hung the moon. She'd tell my sisters,"Ursula never does this," or ,"Why can't you be more like Ursula?". I loved the attention, and used my power wisely. As the oldest in the family, I had to be a good example for my family.

When we grew up, though, Triton thought he was all that, and that he deserved to be king. What the crap?! He wasn't the oldest! So what that the tradition was to give the crown to the first-born son? So what? I deserved the crown- I wasn't a crybaby like Triton, or a brat like the twins, or a bully like Poseidon. NO! I was a big, beautiful, well-behaved young mermaid!

The night before his coronation, I challenge Triton to a duel. We would grab our best potions and make each other drink it. There were two identical-looking clear tubes of potions, but they both had different effects. One would just leave you looking the same, but it would give you a forcefield against those who had drank the other drink, but the other one would reduce your body to a large lump, twist your soul, and make you unable to come near anyone without trying to capture their soul. Whoever drank the wrong one would be banished to a life of exile, but the other drinker would be the ruler of the sea.

We made a wheel go around and around, and then we picked up a random cup.

"Bottoms up," I said, and tipped the cup up. Immediately, Triton was expelled from me and landed limp on the wall, grubby, at least one-thousand pounds, and extremely evil looking.

"Be gone, you evil one!" I cried. Triton looked at me, fear in his eyes, and swam fast away. His tail that was once a beautiful aquamarine was now ugly, black tentacles.

Now, I am the best ruler you have ever seen. I have three children named Baron, Bilimina, and Barge. Too bad that Triton has had seven children. That idiot. He's named all of his children names that start with the letter "A", and he has them do his bidding. They are all hideous-except for Ariel.

Ah, yes, Ariel. She's a rebel. She doesn't want to stay under the sea. She wants to go on land. I could help her, though. One tap of the trident and she'd have legs.

But I can't. She loves to hang out with me. How would I let her have legs but still stay down here...WAIT! I'VE GOT IT! 

She visits my house every day. I could simply make her an offer, make her sign the dotted line (bless her poor unfortunate soul, she won't read the Fine Print), and tell her that she'll return to the sea and I'll keep her soul after three days unless she marries the prince. The prince is too snobby to marry a peasant, so he won't marry her.

Yes, I'll keep her and not have any trouble out of her!

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