Lost


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1. Worlds

I'm in the middle of two worlds. Doctors and nurses crowd me in one world. I am alone in a barren wasteland in the other. These two worlds are the opposite worlds of existence: life and death. I'm not awake in either world I can hear but I cannot think move or speak. I never know where I am drifting between one world and the next. Not long enough to make out what’s going on but no short enough to forget what has happened. I'm lost.

It was my fault. I've tried to blame it on every one I know, it doesn't work it just comes back to me. I want to blame it on someone else so I know I have no right to be here. I want to be able to curse someone, hate them with all my sole. I want to have a reason to wake up so I can get revenge on that person. But I can’t.

I was the one who shouted at my sister. I was the one who ran out the door to play with my friends while my mum needed me. I was the one who dashed into the road just when a car was coming. I am the one whose fault it is: not my sister; not my mum; not my friends: not even the car that drove into me. So now I am the one who is now in a stupid coma, dead to the world. Just like a vegetable. 

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