The Bells of Innocence

Loki's got a FOUL mouth, and children tend to have the WORST of timing. Here's how those two matters avoid one another.

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1. Bells of Innocence

In hindsight, perhaps stealing Thor's hammer had not been a particularly genius idea.

But, then again, foresight had never been one of Loki's greater qualities.

 

Oddly enough, Loki's day wasn't started abruptly with the promise of dismemberment and death, the typical standard in which his daily mornings were often clad. Rather, Loki's morning began entirely with, well, nothing in particular; an entirely foreign concept to the people of Asgard. But an idea, Loki decided lazily as he relaxed happily in his favourite chair set before the roaring fireplace at the heart of his personal chambers, he found that he really rather enjoyed.

Thor, naturally, had to barge into the fire lit, drowsy, room with his temper nearly as red as his face in that precise moment to destroy the settled peace with an impressive timing.

"You!" Thor spat, directing an accusing finger Loki's way, "You had best tell me where Mjolnir is if you enjoy having your head upon your shoulders. Immediately." He warned dangerously.

 

Huh. Loki considered with a slow blink, I hadn't expected him to figure it out so soon.

Notice? Certainly.

 

Loki tried a grin in mock innocence, the action stretching the thin scars that lined his lips seemingly to their limit, his brow frowning softly in false confusion upon the wild accusation. "What makes you think it was me? You are, after all, my favourite nephew." Loki inquired sarcastically, shifting boredly in his seat in a nonchalant manner. 

Lying to Thor was a dangerous game, though not a particularly challenging one, as he tended to have the foul habit of taking out his anger in bursts of an impressive temper. Why, just last week Thor had thrown the Trickster through a tavern's wall. And had the audacity to insist Loki pay for the reconstruction.

 

His back was still sore.

 

"Heimdall has informed of it! Tell me where my hammer is, or I'll knock your head from your shoulders, AGAIN!" Thor roared, stepping forward with a seething malice.

 

"As terrifying as that sounds," Loki started sarcastically, directing an indulgent look sideways, "I do have to point out that as Hela, like her siblings, is now rather young, there is no one to oversee death, and so the dead simply return to their bodies after the event. You need to improve your threats, nephew, you should know that after Ragnarok; that one bears no weight." Loki grinned smugly; and immediately found that he regretted it.

 

Thor lurched forward to the chair, brandishing his large fists before Loki's 'Well, oops..' expression in fury, "You useless veslingr! I'll make your worthless stafkarl hide wish for a permanent death as I hang you with your own entrails; you huglausi var-...!"

 

Thor didn't get to finish the, in Loki's opinion, incredibly ironic insult, as just that moment, the clear sound of a bell ringing floated into the room, prompting Loki to leap to his feet and clamp both his hands over the Thunderer's mouth. The sheer abruptness of the move stunned Thor into  a shocked silence that morphed into an irritated curiosity as he noted the sheer panic in Loki's expression, that even his vulgar death threat couldn't summon.

 

The bell's sound grew sweetly louder until in walked little Vali, his unruly red hair that so resembled his father's was currently a bedraggled mess, and the child yawned as he rubbed his sleep-addled eyes with his palms. Around his left wrist was tied a gentle-looking red ribbon with a little singing bell secured to it, the trinket rang with delight at every movement that the drowsy boy made.

 

"Cousin; why are you yelling?" Vali asked innocently, eyeing both of the men before him in half awake curiousity.

 

Thor sourly shoved Loki's hands away before turning to smile at his little cousin in what he hoped was a convincing manner. "No reason," He replied almost casually, "Your father and I are simply having a discussion."

 

"Really; it's nothing important at all." Loki added much more convincingly before flashing his little one a wide grin, pointedly ignoring the annoyed twitch in Thor's eye. "Why aren't you playing with your brothers and your sister?" He asked, genuinely curious.

 

Vali wasn't one to be alone often.

 

"I was." Vali pouted, sticking out the bottom of his lip sulkily. "We were supposed to be playing hide and seek, but I think that they forgot about me." He said with a hint of annoyance. "I got bored with waiting and guess I fell asleep." He finished with a shrug.

 

"Ah. Well, why don't you go and get them back for it, then?" Loki suggested, seizing upon the prime opportunity to send Vali out of the room. Vali considered it for a moment before shrugging loosely, "Yep!" He declared before cheerfully turning on his heel and dashing out of the doorway, the sound of the departing bell drawn out only by the slamming of the door.

 

"You were saying?" Loki prompted mock pleasantly as Thor pointed to the door with a finger, a frown creasing his features in bafflement, "What was that?"

 

"Vali, my son." Loki explained helpfully, much to the annoyance of Thor, who directed a seething glare Loki's way, "The bell." Thor clarified bluntly. "I find," Loki started with an amused grin crossing his crooked features as he crossed his arms over his chest, "That most death threats seem to occur in my presence. For the oddest of reasons, that I simply cannot fathom." Loki admitted with a shrug, shaking his head with mock confusion as he continued, "So, I put a bell upon each of my offspring to ensure that they don't overhear something they really rather shouldn't this time around."

 

"Ah." Thor stopped, stricken by the oddly likable act for a moment before narrowing his eyes in hositility once more.

 

Ah, but Thor was nothing if not determined, Loki considered absently as Thor stepped forward menacingly, "Loki; you will return Mjolnir to me now, or so help me the venom from Skadi's snake will seem like a lover's caress by the time I'm through with you!"

 

A long silence filled the room as Loki made a show of considering Thor's words before offering a charming and incredibly innocent grin, "Would you believe that I haven't taken it?" Loki inquired pleasantly.

 

 

 

 

*A/N* Translations:

 -veslingr - puny wretch

 - stafkarl - beggar

 - huglausi - cowardly

 - var- was going to be vargdropi - son of an outlaw (or wolf)

 

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