That kid you push in the hallway. The kid you trip up in class or at lunch. The kid who is always alone. That kid goes home and cried everyday without any of you having a single clue. That kid? That's me.


1. 1 Month Ago

I pressed it deep into my wrist. At first only small beads of red appeared but as i dragged it down a reassuring line trickled down my arm and into the sink. Another line. Then another; soon being mixed with the tears streaming down my face to make a murky blur of clear tranquility and the red that seemed into the clear like poison. A twisted smile came to the corners of my mouth, the pain became a pleasure now. A small release. They did this to me, they drove me to this decision. To who i am now. The scared kid in the corner who runs from everything. From everyone. They're all guilty in one way or another. And they'll pay, i'll make sure they do. They need to know the pain i do. I looked into the mirror and saw the black trails that stained my skin. A mixture of dark makeup that i use to hide myself from others and the floods of tears that escape from my eyes everyday. At least they can escape. The crimson river was still flowing from my arm to the sink. I grabbed some squares of toilet roll and cleared away the blood, but it only seemed to spread up the rest of my arm, over all my other scars. All i can think is this is how it has to be. How it has been, ever since that first day around a month ago. This is how its been, and i cant help but think that this is how its going to stay. Trapped here, with a blade to comfort me. Enveloped in my dark thoughts and feelings. Consumed.
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