chocolate pudding or bitter gourd relief ~a review book~

a review book.
comment if you want it reviewed.
the title (preferably with the link).
if it's super long, i'll probably just go through the first five chapters and review.

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8. cpobgr review #7 hidden in the shadows- rebecca rogers

chocolate pudding or bitter gourd relief

review #7

[10.1.16.]
 


 

"you're a wolf."

 

the title: hidden in the shadows

author: rebecca rogers

date published: 22 december 2015

rated: yellow

genre: romance

age: nineteen days old (as of 10th january 2016)

chapters: five

status: in progress

blurb: "this is a story about a werewolf. i started with the classic story of the werewolf and added my own little touches, hope you like it :)" (her blurb, not mine)

 

at first glance:

the cover's nice. the blurb is... alright. let's see what happens.

 

chapter one: the boy from the wood-

the story starts bang on! it is straight on with the plot. a wee bit confusing, but i think it'll be explained better in the coming chapters.
 

chapter two: ivy cave-

this chapter's really direct, like the previous one. the pace is really fast and feels like the story's being really rushed.
 

chapter three: journey-

too fast. everything's too fast. i'm really sorry. but everything's going too fast for me to understand what's really going on. the descriptions about the character are barely there. the story's confusing

 

chapter four: raising moon-

now this i guess was the part where they transformed to a werewolf, right? it's alright.

 

chapter five: where are you-

and the horses are introduced.
 

over-all impression:

the chapter's are really short and aren't described that well. it kind of feels like the story starts out of middle and personally, i was confused as to how it went about. it could have been better. but as for the plot, it's not really linear and fixed. the characters don't yet have that three-dimensional personality that would make it an awesome read.

 

recommendations:

- your writing has ample scope for improving, i recommend you to read more and write more. practice is key.
- the plot build-up can be worked more upon. how the story starts and how the story progresses. it's a bit raw and could use more work
- the outline sketch and the filling in of the characters are very vague and need to be more focused upon. remember, you may have an idea on how your character looks like- but unless you write it out, the others won't get it.
like does rebecca have green eyes or blue? how does she look like? and what about the boy? rebecca's mom? how does the horse look like? these details are minute, but important nonetheless

(i'm sorry if i might offend you with my harsh words, i really am.)

verdict: 

:( a frown for now, a bitter gourd

[if you plan on working on your story a bit more, i'd love to see how it turns out to be. either way, i'll keep a watch over your story- cause i can see potential there]

 

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