chocolate pudding or bitter gourd relief ~a review book~

a review book.
comment if you want it reviewed.
the title (preferably with the link).
if it's super long, i'll probably just go through the first five chapters and review.


11. cpobgr review #10 a garden in spring- fictionbefourblood

chocolate pudding or bitter gourd relief

review #10


"rabi'ah is a muslim.

she is not a terrorist.

she wears hijab out of choice.

she is not oppressed.


islam is a religion of peace.

it does not promote violence.

why is it so difficult for people to understand?"


the title: a garden in spring

author: fictionbefourblood

date published: 28 december 2015

rated: yellow

genre: realism

age: sixteen days old (as of 13th january 2016) *wow, it's young*

chapters: three

status: in progress

blurb: rabi'ah and Rebecca. Rebecca and rabi'ah. Two women. Two lives, that somehow come together, though perhaps not in the way that you think.


at first glance:

i'm expecting a lesbian story. and kind of love the fact there aren't any tags used for me to confirm my suspicion. yet.


chapter one: -

an e.e.cummings quote as the start. not a bad idea. not a bad idea at all. nice.  

chapter two: this is the garden:colours come and go,-

as i just look at the chapter, i see paragraphs. just paragraphs. and in the second half as well. it's all so huddled together that it doesn't do the chapter- the justice it deserves.  

chapter three: frail azures fluttering from night's outer wing-

the chapter's alright. but then again, the paragraphs are too long. 


over-all impression:

-i think it's sort of clear that i appreciate- i emphasize- i appreciate artistic additions, renditions, or modifications to any work, be it minute, subtle or in-your-face. anything artistic in the book, and the artistry in this book has been quite lovely. and it had peaked my interest. and got me curious.


-the cover's great and the blurb where rabi'ah is in lower case, it's beautiful.


-the first line of the quote used as the name of the first chapter, and the second line as the second chapter. a beautiful, beautiful touch.


-the way the two narratives are separated and the difference in the lowercase and uppercase, a remarkable touch.


-and the fact that one of the protagonist is a muslim, and the other- a rape victim, makes me satisfied in a twisted way. firstly, because there are writers who write stories about things other than making love to one direction (not a fan, sorry). secondly, not many people would opt for a serious and delicate issue to write about. i'm impressed.


-overall, a very artistic book.  


-the plot is nice. i love it. but the paragraphs, too long. it's a personal preference that i like shorter paragraphs better. it is too huddled.

-as for the progression, i can't say much. the story's just two chapters in, and i can't tell much right now.

-if it is a lgbt+ story, then that is very bold and i recommend you go at it delicately.

-keep up the good work.


:-I a null face, a pudding with few bittergourd shavings.

verdict clarification to the author:

the bittergourd is for the paragraphs. but don't let that deter you. it's someone else's opinion on your work, a work that can be great. you have potential. very much potential, if i might add. i'll check in on your story after a while to see how you've progressed. i admire your ability to add in subtle details to your story, which make it great.

your story is a story worth telling, and i'd love to hear it.

best of luck, fictionbefourblood.




next up: x by infinite_exho



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