Johnathan the cactus

Johnathan is a cactus, he hates how he is constantly poked at and tred on and bumped into, losing all his spikes to humanity, now he comes to life, and take his revenge on humanity.... (this is just a funny parody of my friend's story "Puppet Strings", go check it out!)


1. The Mean Green Spikey Machine

Johnathan, was a cactus. He was always constantly nudged and hearing people complaining about him, when took of the shelves to clean, people would tred on him. Such a poor life for such a cactus, the anger swelled up inside of him, no, he didn't have to listen to this, it wasn't his fault that he was a cactus. It wasn't his fault that people kept touching him, that was the point of the spikes, so people didn't touch him. "I'll get my revenge" he thought "for those humans constantly poking at me." He sat on his shelf silently, waiting for the time to strike.

Then that night, a boy, called Edward was sleeping, his roots expanded, out from the pot, making a loud crashing sound as it broke apart, waking the boy up, Jamie darted upright looking into the darkness, without seeing anything he just gave a frustrated sigh and laid back down, he shut his eyes once more only to hear rustling and scratching against the wooden floorboards, when he opened his eyes again, scratch marks were all over the walls and floors, roots were tangled up everywhere, before he knew it one of them grabbed his right arm, Edward frowned, "Johnathan what?" Johnathan gave a cackle, and was about to speak until "wait" Johnathan stopped and turned a spikey head towards Jamie "how are you even alive right now? You shouldn't even have a mouth, and how are you growing at night? I mean sure plants are living creatures but-" "Silence!" interrupted Johnathan, the voice shook the house "you should've seen this coming, you insolent fool! For you see, I am the terror of th enight! I will reign havoc on your speices until you bow in submission! I am-" "A cactus." Interrupted Edward, looking quite unimpressed. Coincidentally his mother came into the room, "Edward, dear! Something shook the house!" Within a flash Johnathan shrunk back to normal size and was beautiful pearched on the shelf once again. "It was nothing, ma!" Edward reassured "just go back to sleep!" he gave a nervous laugh, his mother gave a confused look but slowly shut the door again, Edward wandered over to the small cactus and glared at it for a moment.

"You do anything else and you're going out the window. Now let me sleep. I have school tomorrow."

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