type 0 Negative

When the Cullens move to Forks, Bella suspects that Edward is a superhero because of his " freaky yellow eyes and ice cold skin." But she quickly realizes that shes made to be only his sidekick, and a poor one at that. She's probably the only vampire sidekick ever who faints at the sight of blood. AU, HH ( half human.... is that even an acronym?


1. Freaky yellow eyes

Im a sucker for superheros with a dark side.

Theres something spine tinglingly compelling about someone who has the power to hurt, maim and destroy yet who chooses to use that power for good.

But what happens when you find that superhero? Lets say, for the sake of the argument, that you have found a superhero who can stop vans with one hand and practically wipe your memory with a single, mind-numbing kiss. the superhero you have been holding onto for your whole life.

But when you find that your the only sidekick, and a particularly lame one, at that. what happens when you find that the superhero is really the bad guy?

what happens then?

Ill tell you what happens.

The superhero has to make a choice. Not only between blonde heroine and brunette side-kick; that's an easy choice. The superhero has to choose to use his powers for good. To choose between life and death. kinda like us all, really.

This is a story of someone with that choice.

of course, its not me. I don't count,

Not it.


In the fourth grade, i read a book about three kids with grey eyes who could move things with their minds because their mothers were exposed to an experimental drug while pregnant. I dont remember the exact plot of the book,but i do remember that one of the kids used his ability to pickpocket the neighbors. 

Naturally, i think of this book in eleventh grade when i meet the three Cullens with their weird golden eyes. Maybe they have special freaky powers to go along with their freaky eyes. I can just see the creepiest one,Edward, doing something cruel with his golden-eyed powers.

I am right of course. But i dont find out how right til later.



First, the setting. I have lived all but one year of my life in a small time of Forks, a muddy scar on the otherwise beautiful Olympic Peninsula. As a result, i snort when i hear a country song regaling the joys of a small town. Allow me to debunk some of the myths surrounding small town life.

Myth: you dont have to lock your front door. Fact: you do if you don't want to find the neighboring housewife searching through your pantry to try and find some sugar. Myth: The people are friendly. Fact: You walk around like an escaped convict in fear that someone will recognize you and want to make small talk. Myth: There's no waiting list at the local beauty salon. Fact: The ladies of the town ( and some of their dogs) have very similar haircuts.

The point is, if you're not super interested in being sociable, have the neighbors drop by after just getting out of the shower, and sharing the fashion sense of a poodle, Forks is not for you.

Needless to say, i plan on getting out as soon as i graduate from high school. Angela and i made a pact in ninth grade to go off to college together, preferably somewhere as far away from Forks that we can only visit for the occasional holiday. And preferably somewhere that offers events of higher entertainment value that a Mike Newton party.

Second, the protagonist of our story. This is how i meet Edward Cullen.

Its all over school: there are new kids in town. AS you can imagine, in Forks this is a very BIG DEAL. The last new kid that moved here was...

You guessed it: me. In seventh grade. And actually, i moved back in seventh grade after a single year with my mum in phoenix. Tyler and Mike still call me New girl every so often. They crack themselves up.

But this isn't about me or them. This is about Edward. And how the focus of my life shifted to him.

Three new kids with three pairs of golden eyes. This is what i think when i first look at them all sitting in the cafeteria. Of course, this is not what the rest of the student population sees. They are too distracted that the Cullens are a little more attractive than your average spartan.

"oh my gosh" a fresh man gushes in the hallway. "Did you see that new boy? He is so hot!"

Yes, shes one of those. By her inflection, i could tell she meant "hott." I keep walking, But the Cullens seem to follow me everywhere. In and between every class, the hive mind buzzes with the following:

(1) what the Cullens are wearing (expensive)

(2) what the Cullens are saying (nothing)

(3) what the Cullens are doing(looking hot)

Even the queen-bee herself-Rosalie Hale-  is discussing the Cullens.

she's all "i hear they're trouble." she's trying to regain control by casting doubt on the coolness of the Cullens. Rosalie is never comfortable when someonelse is in the spotlight.. she is made to shine.

I mean, look at her.

If i wanted to be dramatic, i could say that Rosalie is my perfect foil. she's all blonde-haired and blue-eyed and red-lipped. I'm all dishwater-haired and brown-eyed and chapped- lipped. 

But i don't really want to be dramatic. I continue to listen to Rosalie.

Rosalie is all, " i hear that their foster parents saved them from juvie." i watched her cascading her golden hair sway as she speaks to a group of identical girls, all dressed in mini skirts.

"Wow, beautiful and dangerous" Lauren said. She isn't as beautiful as Rosalie but that makes up for it being even meaner. Currently, she's foiling Rosalie's plan to discount the Cullens, She's inciting the cheerleading pack to greater heights of curiosity. That's always the problem with surrounding yourself with a pack of identically- dressed people. Usually, they want to be you, so they will stab you in the back when they see the least opportunity to take your place.

I walk on by. Despite myself, my body drags me to biology. 

Bioligy is where i meet Edward Cullen. so you can see why this was inevitable, let me tell you about Biology.Biology is the red- headed step-child of classes. Nothing you do in Biology ever makes real sense, and you wonder how its part of the established curriculum. Here's what i have against Biology. you often have to:

(1) Interact with others

(2) Walk around

(3) work with foreign substances

clearly this is a problem for me because I :

(1) Am anti-social

(2) Can barely walk

(3) Faint at the smell of blood or the smell of formaldehyde

p.s. I've found that bulleted lists help organize thoughts for maximum impact. In this case, you should be impacted by the fact that i hate Biology. Did i mention i have a tendency to set my hair on fire? seriously, that Bunsen burner guy should be sued. 

After today, i can add another reason to my list; Edward Cullen is in my Biology class.

When i walk in i see the Greek God, with the yellow freaky eyes. strike one for Edward Cullen: I learned a long time ago that Greek Gods were not worth it. There's one at every school, and you automatically set yourself up for failure by liking him. Unless, of course, you're the Greek schools goddess, which I'm not,

Greek God is sitting at my lab table. This is odd because Mr Banner learned early on to not subject other students to my table.  Hazard of their health and all that. The rash i inadvertently gave Jessica Stanley went away. Eventually. we have not spoken since then, but how is this a bad thing?

Greek God doesn't look at me as i approach, but he gets this weird look on his face as i sit down. And when i say weird, i mean your typical mask of hatrid. The look you often see on someone's face when you meet them for the first time. He puts his hand over his mouth. He's going to hurl. This is perfectly normal. Formaldehyde usually has this effect on me, too. Mr Banner has just wheeled out the frog's legs covered in my favourite substance. i think I'm to distracted by Edwards revulsion to feel my own. 

i reach out and pat Edwards hand in sympathy. His hand is proper cold and clammy given the circumstances.

"It'll get easier," i say. " once the formaldehyde fries your nasal cavity so that you can't smell anything for the next twelve hours!"

Edward jerks his hand away. He stares down at it as if it repluses him. I note that his freaky yellow eyes are not yellow anymore. They are dark brown, almost black.

Mr. Banner is saying something about frogs legs. He's probably telling us how to cut them up. Perhaps warning us not to eat them. We are staring at Edward's hand as he moves it slowly and inexorably back towards his body. I'm thinking millennium Falcon getting pulled in by the Death star slow. His hands slip beneath the table.

He spends the rest of the period frozen.He's as far away from me as he could be. i spend the next several minutes fuming. my thoughts go like this:

He's probably just sick.                                                                                                                                                     At least he didn't pass out                                                                                                                                                 Greek Gods don't pass out                                                                                                                                               Greek Gods should stay in Olympia where they belong                                                                                                   Or is that down in Olympia from here?                                                                                                                              I've always hated Greek mythology                                                                                                                                  And Geograpghy                                                                                                                                                                Why is there an armadillo in this classroom anyway?

Edward doesn't speak to me.He doesn't help me dissect the frog.The latter is ok; i am used to completing labs on my own.The former is not. After all, i had sympathized with him over formaldehyde. i had tried to physically console him. I don't do this for just anyone. Strike two for Edward Cullen.

The bell rings, and he's out the classroom before i can blink. i stand looking after him in my frog- smeared smock and goggles. Here's another thing to add to the list of things i hate about Biology. I hate goggles.








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