He was looking for something he didn't know existed.
She was looking for someone to fix her.
Maybe together they could help each other along breaking rules after rules.



I was confused, I didn't really know what to do, how to act, what to say and so on. My feelings were mixed, in a way I liked the fact that Eric worked at the school because that way I knew were he was, but then I remembered that the fact that he is my teacher, he and I couldn't have any relationship at all because he's my teacher. And if we did have a relationship, he would risk losing his job and I would risk being thrown out of school. But would that be worth it?

“So what do you think the meaning behind this poem is?” 

“Louisa, you look like you know the answer. Louisa!” Mr. Starmark raised his voice and I snapped out of my zoning out and looked confused at him. 

“Sorry, uh what was the question again?” I asked with a quiet voice and looked embarrassed at Mr. Starmark. 

“Focus you can't keep zoning out. My question was ‘what do you think the meaning is behind the poem?’, what do you think about it?” He asked looking at me with a emotionless express on his face.

“Uh yeah.. Uh I think that the writer actually is deeply in love with someone who he is not supposed to be in love with and he describes his feelings towards her but also what he is feeling and how he is going through it. And even though that they are not be together, he doesn't care and will do anything to her because he’s in love. And that the love he has for her will never go away no matte what happens.” I said while fiddling with my pencil in my left hand and looking up at Mr. Starmark. “And he realizes that no matter what he needs to be with her and doesn't care about the consequences that it will have.” I added looking away at my teacher and out at the windows we have as a wall in the classroom and saw Eric walk past the classroom talking with a student. 

I sighed and looked down at my notebook and then up again and made eye contact with Eric and then looked down again. I hadn't spoken with him since the day I had history the first time for the semester. It was Wednesday now and every day after school I would walk to the park and sit at the bench alone or with Ely by my side, talking, wondering why this had happened to me. 

I zoned out again and before I knew it it was time for lunch and I couldn't be more excited for lunch and to see Ely again. I must admit that I miss not having almost all of my classes with Ely, but in a way it was nice just to be yourself and not known as the ‘twosome’ who would be together all the time. 

“Lou!” Ely yelled when he saw me in the hallway walking with all of the other students to the cafeteria. “I'm so sorry, but I can't have lunch with you. Mick invited me to eat by the pool and I said yes, I'm so sorry mi promise to make it up to you!” He said excited and I nodded understanding.

“No, don't apologize I know you have a crush on him, go! Go Ely!” I laughed with a smile on my face but in a way I felt a little sad because now I wouldn't have anyone to sit with at lunch. But before I knew it, Ely kissed me on the cheek and ran out of the hallway and out to Mick who was waiting for Ely. I sighed and then proceeded to walk to the cafeteria to buy a bagel with salmon and cream cheese and a water along with some grapes. I usually I would bring my own food to school but we were out of food and that was why we had gotten pizza from the local pizza place and why we didn't have any food left other than a slice or two of the chili pizza who Daddy G had ordered. 

“Okay that's it for today, but remember to start on the paper for next week!” Mrs. Lacks said as the bell ringed for the last lesson of the day. Happy I collected my stuff and headed out in the hallway and started to walk to my locker for my backpack, unfortunately my locker was in another building than where I was, so I had to walk for a few minutes, but it was cool. A lot of the students usually take their backpacks with them for the last lesson they're having so they can leave as soon as the bell rings. I just liked to have my backpack in my locker so I wouldn't risk losing it and usually when I got to my locker almost all the students were gone, so there was quiet in the hallway for once. After walking for five minutes or so I ended up at my locker and quickly I opened it, placed my book and notebook in my locker along with my pen, I took my backpack out from my locker, took on my leather jacket and my backpack on my back, slammed the door to my locker and proceeded to walk towards the doors that was close to my locker. 

“I knew you were the last one out of the school, always the slow type.” A deep voice said behind me when I was walking down the stairs outside, I took a look behind my shoulder and my breath hitched in surprise to see who it was that was behind me. James.

“James.” I whispered nervous and stopped walking. “W-what are you doing here? You're  not supposed to be here.” I stuttered and looked out on the empty parking lot and the grass. We were alone. 

“You haven't heard from Ely? I'm surprised.” He chuckled, he knew Ely and I were always together and if Ely knew something I would want to know he would tell me. 

“Uh, I-I-I I haven't seen him since lunch.” I stuttered when James took a septet closer to me. Uncomfortable I took a step down the stairs hoping he wouldn't get closer to me. I wasn't supposed to be near him. Not after what he has done to me. “now answer my question. Why are you here?”

“So you're serous now? You were never serious around me last time we were together.” He chuckled and stepped closer to me. 

“why here?” I asked and breathe in and then out hoping he wouldn't see I was nervous. “Why this school?” James didn't say anything but just stepped closer to me so he were inches away from each other. 

“Because-“ he started and took a firm grip on my arms, “I miss you.” He smiled with his still white smile that everyone dawns over. I shook my head immediately after he stopped talking.

“No you don't. And get off of me.” I said and tried to pull my arms away from his firm grip but failed. 

“Of course I do, I miss the way you blush when I'm around. The way you're always nervous in my presence and how much you can't keep your hands away from me.” He said and placed his lips on mine without my consent. I panicked and started pulling my arms to myself and moved my head away from his but somehow his lips always found mine. 

“Stop.” I murmured on his lips but James only started firming his grip in my arms making it hurt. “You're hurting me, stop. James stop hurting me.” I said when he finally stopped kissing me. 

“Why do you always have to be a bitch?” He said angry, let go of my arms and gave me a little push of the stairs so I fell down on the ground and smashing my head against the concrete and I let out a scream and felt my cheeks getting wet. I took my hand to the back of my head and felt something wet on my fingers, shocked I looked at my hand and saw dark red blood on my fingers. Scared to see if James still were here, I looked up only to see no one was here, I was alone, James had ran away. In a way I was relieved that I was alone but I was also scared because I didn't know what to do now. I began feeling lightheaded and looked around to see if anyone was near me but I was all alone. 

“Oh my god, Louisa! What happened to you?” I heard a voice, I looked around me but I couldn't figure out who was in front of me because my sight was slurred. “Louisa! Don't faint, please look at me, focus.” The voice, a male I figured, said and sounded scared. 

“My head.” I whispered and took my hand that was already covered in blood and touched were it hurt on my head. 

“You're bleeding, oh god.” The voice was getting farther away and more quiet as the time passed by. “Please pick up for once… Please pick up…. Adam! Thank god, I need your help, uh it's Louisa, she uh I don't know how it happened but I think she fell down the stairs and now she's bleeding and she is starting to faint, please come and pick me and her up. She needs help…. I don't care, she needs the help. Just come please.” Was the last thing I heard before I was gone.

I didn't know where I was but I did know that my head was in a lot of pain. All I could hear was beeps from a machine of a sort, but my eyelids felt so heavy that I didn't have the energy to open them to see where I was. 

“Shouldn't she be awake by now?” A heard a deep voice ask someone in the room. 

"Yes but for some people it takes longer to wake up.” Another deep voice said. Confused as to who was in the room with me and where I was, I moved my head slightly but took my right hand up to my head when the pain came. 

“Louisa! You're awake. Thank god, we were all so worried.” I recognised Ely’s voice and tried open my eyes but they still felt heavy on my eyes. 

“It hurts.’ I mumbled and squinted my eyes in pain when I felt my eyes started watering. 

“It's okay, don't cry baby.” He whispered in my ear. “I'll get your dads.” He said louder, I tried nodding but failed as it hurtled more than before. 

“I will get the doctor so you can be checked on, be right back.” The other deep voice said.

“Okay.” I whispered and tried slowly opening my eyes, I could see soft shapes of stuff around the room but not sharp edges. It didn't take long for me to open my eyes completely and I looked around the room I was in and saw a monitor beside me monitoring my heart rate and a drip bag filled with salt water I presumed. Taking a deep breath I looked over at the window and saw it was dark outside. 

“We were so worried honey. Please do not ever do that ever again!” Daddy G  said with a cracked voice when he and my other dad walked into the room, at the sight of them, the tears started sprinting down my cheeks because I was so happy to see them.

“What happened?” I asked quiet when I hugged my dad and I heard him sigh.

“You don't remember?” He said with a sad voice and I really didn't remember anything at all.

“No.” I whispered and took a deep breath.

“I'm so happy Mr. Kydd saw you laying on the ground when he was going home. Honey you fell down the stairs outside school, you’re clumsy but this is too clumsy for you, are you sure you don't remember we anything at all?” I saw my two dads with tears in their eyes when Daddy N told me what had happened to me.

“Nothing, the last thing I remember is when I was at my locker.” I said and squeezed both of my dads hands. “Wait did you say Mr. Kydd found me?” I asked when I realized what my dad had told me and saw him nod. 

Oh fuck I thought.

”Yes, I don't know why you never told us about him, he is the kindest man I’ve ever met. He’s been here the whole time since you got in. Been so worried about you, now that's a teacher I like.” My dad sighed with a smile. 

"Is he still here?” I asked intrigued but also nervous, I really hoped in a way that he was here but then again not. I didn't want to risk seeing him again and regret what j said to him, well I didn't want to regret it even more than I did now. 

“No, you just missed him, told us he needed to go home and get Agee things done for tomorrow's class.” My dad said and removed a few strains of hair away from my face. I was about to say something when I got disturbed by the doctor walking into the room.

“Sorry to interrupt again, but I need to check on Louisa and I think it will be best if she is alone right now. Might help her with the headache she will have the next few hours.” A deep voice said whom I recognised and quickly my eyes flickered over to the door and saw Adam standing there in his uniform. 

“Uh yeah sure.” Ely said and both of my dads nodded understanding. Daddy G gave me a kiss on my forehead and then left the room with Daddy N and Ely so Adam and I were alone.

“And we meet again Louisa.” Adam said with a smile and looked at my medical record. 

"We do." 

“How are you feeling?” He asked and looked at me, with a lifted eyebrow I looked at him as if he didn't already knew that.

“My head or my heart?” I asked as a joke but Adam didn't take it as a joke when he told me wanted to know about both.

“Well my head feels like it's going to explode, I can't move without it hurting oh and I screwed everything up with one of the best guys I’ve ever met. How's that for you?” I asked and sighed with my arms crossed over each other. 

“Let me check your eyes’ reaction to light.” He said and walked towards me and took his mini flashlight up from his pocket and stopped beside my bed I was laying in, slowly I over my legs from bed over the edge of the bed and looked up at Adam and he sat down on the chair besides the bed and the little table. 

“Look at me.” He said when he moved the flashlight across my left eye and after the right eye. “You never told Eric you still were in high school.” Adam stated. “He never asked.” I said and blinked. “He can't stop thinking about you or talking.” He said looking at the gaze on my head. “Neither can I.” I sighed and shook my head a little. 

“You never told us about you being a doctor, said you were still in medical school.” I said

“Okay, let's get your parents back in here.” He said without commenting on what I said as if he ignored it. “Okay.” I mumbled and Adam quickly got my dads back in the room with me.

“Well it looks like Louisa has a small concussion, nothing to worry about. But make sure she stays awake for a few hours more and that she takes it slow, no television, phone or reading. You need to relax for a day or two and you should be good to go.” Adam said looking at my medical record again and then at me and my dads. 

“What about school?” I asked looking at him and he sighed. 

“You can go to school tomorrow, but no PE for a week, you need to relax so I would suggest you take it easy on your homework for a few days.” He sighed, said he was done here and my dads followed him out of the room and thanked him. 

“Are you ready to go then?” Daddy G said and I nodded and slowly got out of bed and started changing into my clothes I was wearing before. 


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