Blue Neighbourhood

This is my take on the poignant, yet powerful music video trilogy by Troye Sivan.


"only fools fall for you, only fools. . ."


5. 1.5



   In retrospect, I must confess that the thought of Troye and I being inseparable and the incapability of anything ever breaking us apart was completely naive. Having lost my mother, I should have known better than to allow myself to harbor such an unrealistic mindset. From Mum's battle with cancer, I was taught the appalling truth that no person was promised tomorrow. However, I made the ludicrous mistake of turning a deaf ear. I needed someone by my side, there with me no matter the obstacles hurled my way. My desire for a friend to call my own till death did us part obstructed me from seeing what stood right in front of me. People who pledge to never abandon you one day can just as easily vanish the next. Unfortunately, I had to learn this lesson twice.


   After hearing the muffled thud of my Skechers against the sand, I was met with a small group of people, laughing and bantering with one another, a grill planted in the center of the cluster of my father's friends. A few glass bottles with liquid inside scattered about the circle of men and women. The smell of grilling hamburger patties filling my nostrils to the rim. The ambiance of camaraderie settling over everyone and anyone at the beach. 

    I squinted my eyes in response to the radiant, blinding sun, scrutinizing my surroundings for my best friend and his dad. 

   It had been about a week and a half since Troye and I jumped off the jetty at this beach. And a week and a half since I began questioning my true feelings towards him. I didn't want to have to deal with them at all in the first place. I was so disgusted with myself that I swore to never allow thoughts about him to fester in my mind in desperate hopes of staving off my blossoming love for him. I even considered avoiding him for just a while, to escape the accusations bouncing off in my head. I tried my hardest to make the feelings vanish. But every single time I see that luminescent and contagious smile of his, or hear his laugh, or think about his bravery, his humanity, his curiosity, my heart pounds inside my chest a little faster and I feel myself falling deeper into this pit that I am barely crawling out of. 

   Damn you, Troye. Why did you make me fall?

   A couple of people got up from where they sat to grab a Coke from the cooler placed next to the grill, and that was when I spotted Michael and Troye. My pulse quickened at the sight of Troye grinning at jokes a friend was telling everyone in the circle.

   I approached the group and Troye, shaking my head a little to get unwanted thoughts out of my head. Someone acknowledged my presence and yelled out, 'Hey! It's Jason!' Alarmed,  I swiveled my head to find the source of shouting. My eyes landed on one of Dad's oldest, best friends, Liam. I gave a weak wave before I saw Michael and Troye approaching my father and I. My lips wobbled into a smile and all I could hear was the thundering of my heart between my ears. 

   Dad held the sword and hat that I used to play pirates with Troye and Michael brought his gear as well. 

   I pulled my best friend in for a short hug and the four of us exchanged greetings. He and I took off with our pirate paraphernalia to the east side of the shore, babbling about who would be paying a visit to Davy Jone's locker. We ran around in circles with our swords clanking against one another. I accidentally collided with him and we spun each other until we were on the ground holding our stomachs because they ached from roaring with laughter. 

   We then wanted to climb the tree we always climb in the forest. Troye asked his father if he and I could play around in the woods next to the beach. Michael wore a look of concern, but it evaporated quickly with an 'Okay, but you guys be careful.' 

   "We most definitely will, Dad." Troye seized my arm and practically yanked me across the beach into the woodsy area. 

   This should be very interesting, a chorus of voices teased me. I told the voices to shut up. 


   I struggled to get myself up on the branch but when I finally did, I celebrated with a Tarzan-esque roar. Troye joined in with me. I was sure everyone one else at the beach could hear us yelling, but I stopped with what sort of looked like an octopus caught my eye. 

   I jumped off the high branch, pain shooting up my feet and legs as I landed on the ground. I inched over to the thing and then I heard a thud, realizing Troye was following me. I crouched down when the animal laid inches away from my Skechers. My hand reached out to touch it. 

   "Jace. It's a squid. Why the heck are you touching it? We don't know if it's alive or not." My best friend tried to scold me but his serious tone was interrupted with laughter. We had been in this place hundreds of times, but we've never gotten this deep into the woods. 

   "I'm a thousand percent sure this thing is dead and can't hurt us. Squids live underwater, Troye. And this one is in the woods. Dead." I assured him and rolled my eyes playfully, bending to pick up and hold the heavy, flesh colored sea creature. I examined the animal, my face scrunching up in a mixture of interest and nausea.

   Troye peered over my shoulder to get a better look at the squid. His features showed a twisted expression of disgust as well. "Put it down, Jace. It's gross. You don't know what's on it anyway." He said after he figured he stared at it long enough and it was starting to creep him out. 

   "Alright, crybaby," I teased, chuckling, "I'm putting it down." I contemplated dropping the squid on the ground just to startle him a bit but I decided against it. I placed it on the bed of leaves and twigs next to me, where it rested before Troye and I stumbled across it. "There." 

   "I'm not a crybaby." Troye argued, but the grin plastered on his face told me he's just being humorous. 

   "Yes, you are." I shot back with a chuckle. 

   "No, I'm not." He tried to sound aggressive, still smiling. 

   "Fine, let's go back and play pirates or something since this place is obviously freaking you out." I hooked my right arm around his neck and messed up his chestnut hair with my other. 

   "No, dude! You just touched a squid with those hands! I'm gonna have to wash my hair tonight!" Laughing, Troye tore himself from my grasp, jogging out of the forest to get away from me. His adorable chortle made my heart swell. Everything about him makes my heart swell.

   There go the voices again.

   "Yo, Troye! Wait up!" I followed closely behind him. 

   When Troye and I walked out of the woods, what my eyes are allowing me to see made my stomach plummet to my feet. All traces of color are drained from my face. 

   My dad is hitting Michael.

   "Hey, Dad!" I called out to my father, rushing to the two men. As I was nearing the group of adults trying to break up the fight, I heard phrases like, 'Dillon! Get the fuck off him, man!' and 'Say another damned thing about Madi and I swear to fucking God you won't live to see another day!' 

   The latter phrase was from my dad. 

   My father repeatedly threw punches at Michael and missed, for which I am thankful.  Once I reached Dad, whose face was ablaze and contorted with fury, I pushed him aside with every ounce of force I possessed. Troye sprinted to Michael doing the same. 

   After we successfully pried the two men from each other, I turned my head to watch Michael point at my father. "If you can't have any dignity for yourself then get the hell out of here," He emphasized each word with rage and disdain. 

   Troye looked at me with worry. After a short, yet tense silence, my dad gave in. "Come on, Jason, let's go home." He turned away from Michael and clutched a half full beer which sat on the cooler. We walked away, my father throwing the bottle on the ground. Its contents spilled and seeped into the sand.

   After we were about a few feet away from the barbecue, I confronted him. 

   "Seriously, Dad? What was that for?!" I almost yelled at him, surprising myself with the volume of my voice. It was as if he didn't care one bit about what just went down a few minutes ago. He should care. This was Michael he was hitting.

   "Shut your damn mouth, Jason." He spat. 

   "But why did you do that? You do this all the time! You ruin every--" 

   "Didn't I just tell you to shut the fuck up?!" Suddenly I felt my father's hand make contact with my face. Impulsively, I touched my cheek with my hand, pain prickling the place where he slapped me. 

   He slapped me.

   Tears stung  my eyes and my voice was loud, but it faltered. "Why. . . ?" was all I could muster.

   "Say another freaking word and you're gonna get it when we get home. Understand me?" My father's face turned red. He was livid. 

   I hated seeing him like this. It scared me. My cheeks were drenched.

   My lips quivered. I just nodded. He snatched my shirt and dragged me with him to his truck. 

[I finally updated!! Sorry for the delay. First off, I want to wish you a HAPPY NEW YEAR!! WE MADE IT TO 2016 WOO HOO! Secondly, what do you think of this chapter? It's kind of sad, I know. But there will be a mixture of happy and sad chapters in this book, so I guess when these things kind of happen, you need to be prepared. Also, I'll be tweaking a few things in this book, so if you see something  in this book different from the last few chapters or even in the first chapters, don't freak out. I'm editing a few small things. What do you think will happen in the next chapter? Tell me in the comments below! I'll be updating soon, but for now, see ya on the flipside! :)]


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