Thoughts of a Sarcastic Teenager

"Every teenager should have at least one journal to write their thoughts in... Or so says my guidance counselor, Jeff."

Lynae is known as the quiet, shy girl in school, but her guidance counselor and journal say otherwise. Lynae is actually a sarcastic young teen with a tendency to mock whoever she can and has a hatred for most people. Her family life isn't all rainbows and sunshine either, but that doesn't stop Lynae from being who she truly is. Join Lynae and read her journal entries as she tries to live her school life to the fullest, all while Jeff and her teachers try to make her express herself more.

With all that she has to say, will they be able to handle the large amounts of sarcasm that she's willing to throw their way?


3. Oh Great, A New Student

October 1, Friday 20xx

Damn, I forgot I had this journal. Oh well, here I am, writing into a journal like a loser who has nothing better to do with their life. I decided to write what day it was because it would be a pain or something, I think it's a good idea and knowing you Jeff, you think it's a good idea too. 

So, let's talk about today. It was a good day overall, if you don't include the idiots that arrived. I think it's a smart idea, let's let more foolish people into the school and have them ruin everyone else's lives while assuming they know how to live theirs. What harm could they do? Not a lot, just disrupt the class and possibly get someone pregnant while they're add it. Did I mention that the new students were male? Yeah, two of them were and they had a little sister who just entered grade 9, Jeff told me. I don't know about the other brother or what he looked like, but one of them actually has two classes with me, and that's not a good thing. Why?

Because he looks like the lead singer in a stupid boy band. 

I kid you not, he has his ruffed up and shaggy brown hair with his skinny jeans, a flunnel button up in a nice shade of blue if I might add, and of course, he looks like a 12 year old girl with how hairless his face is. Puberty, you dare come at me at an early age but miss him? Now, that's not fair, I didn't ask for everything you gave me. He was introduced to us during first period Art class, and you bet it, the girls went crazy. My ears are still stinging from all their high pitched giggles and squealing. And to make it worse, he had to sit next to me. The only reason the three seats next to me were empty was because Josh, who likes to sit there rather than at his assigned seat, was not in school. Yup, that became his assigned seat and now I have to sit next to Mr. Boy Band all the while the girls surround both our connected desks, this prevents me from doing my work. Are you punishing me, Zeus?Because if you are, why didn't you stop it there?

Of course you didn't because you hate me, with all your being I might add, and made the teacher call on me to show him around the whole school and take him to and from class. I've never wanted to throw a book at a teacher as I did at that very moment. 

He, of course, turned to me with a smile. Oh no, don't smile at me like that, you'll make me throw up stars and hearts. Honestly all I did was stare at him for a good five seconds, not saying a word, before turning to do my art assignment. He did try to strike up a conversation but I guess he took the hint. I won't talk to someone who pretends to be a nice guy, everyone knows that self-proclaimed nice guys are so full of it. The only reason I know he's a self proclaimed nice guy is because I'm just that good at judging a person's character, you just have to look at their body language and their eyes, those two things tell you everything about a person. He continued to talk with the girls and act as though he wasn't really all that interested, but it was obvious that he was just drinking in their attention like a man at a bar with lots of cash to buy his own drinks. 

Seriously, get a life. 

After class I tried to leave him behind, packing up my things quickly and with all the stealth of a ninja, I made it out the door. He noticed because he called my name out, and might I add that the jerk mispronounced it. 

As revenge, I purposely made sure to walk past a group of girls that instantly became his fans. That seemed to do the trick because as soon as he passed by them in order to catch up to me, they stopped him. I took that time to run off and make it to my next class, large smirk on my face as I walked right in and sat myself down. Luckily for me, the teacher announced that some of the students, the bad ones, were off on a trip to some random camp with a name I'm too lazy to write down. The school finally did it, they finally got the bad kids out long enough for me to focus on my studies. The day went on like it never has before, and for once I was able to listen to the teacher without someone screaming or laughing at the top of their lungs in order to destroy all the hopes I have of wanting to be a business owner. I want to say that's the end of it, I really do, but unfortunately that's not it. The Gods won't even grant me that. The new kid, who's name is apparently Eren Grimes, was looking for me all over the school. That creeper. He caught up to me and kept blathering on and on about how he had trouble finding his way through the school and where he was supposed to go. 

You think you can make me feel guilt? Ha, what a laugh. 

Of course after much talking from his end, I went to my class which, unfortunately, we shared. And what did that jerk do? That's right, he sat himself down right next to me. No, how dare you sit next to me peasant, go away. He tried to ask me for my notes, to which I just turned to stare at him for a while, before turning back to take even more notes that were up on the board. Ironically I was in English and Mrs. Heartswan was talking about journal prompts... I guess that's why I remembered I had to write about what happened today in here. This is very important, this kid wouldn't leave me alone. 

Of course, trying to be the nice guy he was, he just called me shy and said that he liked 'shy' girls. Do I look shy to you? If I gave you a death glare you'd probably think that angry girls are also cute. Oh, you're so adorable when you look like you're about to rip out my spleen and crush my skull into the pavement like a mortal combat fatality. I would definitely do that, only difference is that I'm not Sub-Zero and sadly, I have none of his skills or powers. 

Knowing you Jeff, you'll probably scold me or whatever for not showing Eren around. You know me already, I hate having someone around me who can't seem to give me a decent reason as to why giving them my time of day is a good idea and very beneficial. Most people would call me stuck up or snooty or even a female dog for even thinking of myself as too special to speak with anyone. Well, excuse me for having self worth and knowing who should waste my time and who shouldn't. Wasting my time is a privilege, not a right. He's not special, so why should I have to treat him like he's some celebrity. Are you Daniel Radcliff? Are you Trey Parker? Matt Stone? Are you even Sir Arthur Conan Doyle? No? Than I have no reason to waste my time talking to you just because you gave me a petty compliment like calling me cute. 

I'm not cute, I am mighty and strong and have the ability to practically destroy you. 

Don't call me cute damn it. 

Of course he asked if he could walk me home, to which I didn't respond and he took that as a silence yes. As soon as he went to his locker on the far end of the hall, I got my things and immediately bolted out of there. I'm amazed at how fast I was able to swerve through the crowd and go with the flow as they rushed out the double doors of the school like wave upon wave of student bodies evacuating the premises. I made it home with no one following me and greeted Damien, as per usual since I realized he's the only man in my life I consider special enough to waste time on. Mom wasn't home, but she was probably at Viola's house talking about how Emily, my other next door neighbor who lives on the right side of us, was pregnant with her third kid and it probably belongs to some other man. Yeah, my mom LOVES to talk about other people's sex lives and who cheated on who and where. I have no idea why she likes that, and if she isn't careful she might be next.

Wait, I shouldn't care about that, I shouldn't even say it, but I couldn't care less. I get along better with dad anyways. He's cool and when I'm hungry he actually makes dinner for me. That's why fighting him to the death when I cook is harder since I always secretly give in and serve him some. But don't tell anyone, they're going to assume I'm soft and I'll have to punch some kid in order to show my dominance again. 

Don't hold that against me Jeff. 

Anyways, here I am writing to journal again and blah blah blah. I should name you. I will name you something amazing and after someone whom I respect very much...

You shall now be known as Seth, after Seth Rogen. He is a great actor and I loved his role in the Green Hornet. Anyways, I'm off Seth, I'll write tomorrow or... Wait tomorrow's the weekend so nothing important will happen. I'll write on Monday, take that Jeff. 

Later Seth. 



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