"Everything is contingent, and there is also chaos."

Contingent (Adjective):
1. Dependent on something that is uncertain
2. Something that may or may not happen; possible


21. Chapter 20: Here We Go

Lou P.O.V.

Beep! What's that? Beep! The extra weight of an arm came off me for a moment. Oh, the stupid alarm. 

I felt his arm fell back on my torso to hold me close to his firm chest. What day is it actually? His arm moved away again, this time moving downward. He went ahead and grabbed my ass.

"Mmm, stop it," I mumbled. 

He continued and in his morning raspy voice he whined, "Princess, but I want to." He went on and nudged his nose on my neck and jaw started to place spongey lazy kisses on my skin. 

I glanced over and his eyes were slightly cracked open. I noticed how his eyes are super blue in the morning like I can see a silver of bright blue in them. After all of that, he had a dopey little smile and crinkled his cute button nose. 

God, he's the best! So, what are we doing today? I pushed Luke off and sat up quickly. I shouted, "Oh shit! Isn't your mom going to be here! It's New Year's Eve and you're going to be performing Times Square and your mom and I go to get ready for today and your mom and-"

"Lou, I was having a nice moment with you-"

"I'm sorry I just-"

"Yeah, don't worry about it," Luke assured.

I countered, "But it's like literally the first time in meeting your mom. She's like queen in the Fam ok! I don't even know what I will do when I see her!"

"You're going to act normal." He sassed. 

"What? Like I acted normal when I met you the first time." I laughed. "I was dying inside and I wanted to fucking scream."

"But, you played it off."

"Shhh...." I put my pointer finger on his lips. "Never forget that I am a fangirl. I don't know how I'm going to act."

Luke gave me a disgusted look which is something Calum would do. He took my finger away from his lips. 

"What?" I said. He smirked. "You know something I don't." His smirk grew into a huge smile. "Yeah, you do! Tell me! You're such a dork!"

He explained, "I'll tell you later or you'll probably find out later."

I got up from the bed and started heading towards the bathroom. "Later, as in surprise me. Ok so, I'll be getting ready."

• • •

*I wore a unicorn rainbow white sweater, jeans with one ripped knee and some beige colored boots.*

"I'm ready," I stated. I saw was a large figure under the covers. I went over and pushed him towards the edge. "Get up, damnit. Your mom is coming any moment and-"

"You're nervous and excited right now. I get it," he added. I stared at him. "I'll get ready don't worry. Hang out with the others in the meantime."

"I really got to say. Seems like Lucifer has sass today. Peace." 

I left our room to the other boys. I could only imagine the madness that's going on in there. 

I knocked and Ash opened the door. "Hey, what's up, Ash!" I greeted. 

Ash summarized, "Hey Lou! Not much really. Michael still hasn't gotten out of bed and Cal is just getting ready for the day."

"I thought it would be crazy here, but alright." I smiled. 

"Yeah, later it is though. Want to help me wake up, Michael?"

"Yeah sure." We both went over to Michael. "So what do we do first?"

"I don't know. I usually start poking him." He chuckled. 

I nodded in agreement. He poked his cheek. I did the same. "How about?" I pointed to his nose. 

"Yeah, let's do that!" 

Ash put his finger up Mikey's nose and I was dying of laughter. What are we even doing? 

"Nothing's working," Ash complained. 

I said, "Don't worry. I got an idea." 


I pushed Michael out of the bed onto the floor. I couldn't stop laughing. He's going to be screaming at me. I almost did that with Luke too. Ash just looked at me with a shocked face. 

"You bitch! Why'd you push me off the bed?" Michael exclaimed. 

Still laughing I began, "To wake your lazy ass up and because I can."

"I'm going to get you back, Lou, soon."

"Why do you guys always say soon? Why not an exact time or date? Like seriously though is it that hard?"

Before I could say anything else, Calum came out all ready. He started, "What happened? Why is Michael on the floor?"

"He's fallen and can't get up," I replied while giggling.

Michael shouted, "Shut the fuck up!" He started towards the bathroom.

He started towards the bathroom.

Ash said. "Lou, you're just-" 

"Yeah I know," I interjected and giggled some more. "Cal, so what's up?"

Ash left the room and I didn't know why. Hmm. "Not much. Just waiting for my mom. Oh yeah, you get to meet our moms today." 

"Yeah, um, don't remind me."

"Nervous much." I nodded. "Just relax. We should really make a handshake."

"Oh my god, Cal that's a good idea! Let's do it! Ok so, how are we going to start it?"

Luke P.O.V.

I got ready and I can't wait to see my mom after all these months. She's the best and I love her so much. Hopefully, she likes Lou too as much as I do. 

So much to do today, I'll hopefully have time for everything and everyone. It's like the last day before Lou has to leave. I don't like leaving her. 

Sometimes I just wish we could be next to each other all the time. Sometimes I just wish my life can be normal. Sometimes I just wish everything went my way. 

Ashton walked in and informed, "Lou has an attitude this morning. You should've seen what she did to Michael when we tried to wake him up."

"What did she even do?" I questioned. 

"We'll let's just say, she made Michael call her a bitch."

"That's my girl!" I chuckled. 

"One more thing, I think our moms are here too. Let's go!"

We walked to the other room and all I heard was Cal and Lou talking. Then, I just saw Michael on his phone. 

"Hey, Luke!" Cal greeted. 


"Look what Lou and I made up."

They did a really complicated handshake. How did they have the time to make that up? I clapped when they were done. They continued talking or doing what ever they were doing. 

I went over to Michael and laid my head on his lap. "Hai, Mikey."

Michael stated, "Lou's a bitch and you suck balls."

"Not my fault she did that. No I don't! Stop saying that!"

"Yeah you do! You're literally laying down on my balls right now!" I kept staring at him. "Fuck you."

Ashton opened the door and our moms finally came! 

Michael threw me off of him and ran over to Karen. I ran over to my mom, Liz and hugged her tightly. 

Lou P.O.V.

I just stood there so awkwardly like where do I go to? What do I do? I watch them hug and stuff. Liz, the queen, is fucking here. I don't even know what to say or act, still. 

Luke told Liz something. They're coming over. Oh shit! I'm fucking dying internally. Nope, run away Lou, run away. 

"Mom, this is my girlfriend, Louisette or Lou," Luke introduced, "Lou, this is my mom."

I was just smiling. But I didn't know what kind of smile I had on my face. Content or nervous? Probably a mix of both? 

"Nice to meet you, Mrs. Hemmings," I said. 

Liz corrected, "Oh no, you can call me Liz and nice to meet you too."

"Ok, Liz," I smiled some more. I probably look creepy right now. 

"Doesn't Luke drive you crazy sometimes?" She joked.

"Yeah, all the time." I turned to Luke. "But, crazy in both the good and the bad way." He grinned. 

She smiled back. "That's nice. He tells me so much about you."

My eyes widened and looked towards Luke. "He does, huh?" He blushed. Aww, he's adorable.

"So, we have a long day today," Ash started. "First of all, we have to go on the Today show to do one song and get interviewed. Then, get interviewed again at a radio station. I think it was z100."

Michael interrupted, "Wait, we're doing all of that, like today!" 

"No, we're laying down the whole day," Cal sassed. 

Luke just gave concerned looks at them. The moms just looked so happy to be there with their sons. It's all just cute. 

"I'm just going to continue. So, we have to sound check for the concert and then perform and then go to the New Year's Eve party."

Wait what did Ash say? "Woah, woah, woah! Party you guys are going to a party. With like famous people and stuff?" I questioned.

Liz turned to me confused and concerned. Oh no. What did I say?

"Um, yeah Luke didn't tell you?"

"No." The room was just silent. I swear I'm just the weird person here. You know why? Because I'm a fangirl. Why couldn't I be famous and crap? "But, that's awesome." I smiled nervously. 

"Oh yeah, we get to party after all of that. I'm happy now," Michael spoke. 

Calum looked like he was going to sass him again. I just gave Cal a look telling him to chill. 

Ash continued,"So, I guess we have to go now or we'll be late."

I left the room first because c'mon it was getting awkward and I'm so confused right now. I went back to my room to get my coat and think of something to do. I can't go with them at all like how are we going to work this out. I already looked stupid in front of Liz. I suck. 

Luke walked in looking for me again. He looked so worried. It's all my fault. He's always worried about me and I shouldn't let him feel this way. 

I was staring out of the window to the beautiful city covered in a white blanket of snow. "Lou?" Luke said.


"You seemed a bit-"

"Before you say anything, I'm sorry."

"Don't be sorry. You didn't do anything wrong. Liz likes you even if you feel like she doesn't. She was telling me how I picked like a perfect girl."

I blushed a bit and screamed on the inside. Liz likes me. You're lying Luke just shut up! Oh my god! "Really?" He nodded. "But, I was apologizing because I always make you worried about me or like I feel that you always are kind of stressed about us. I know I'm complicated and this is kind of complicated especially with the fact that we have to hide from Fam. But, you know."

"Lou, don't be sorry. I'll do anything for you." I looked down. "Look at me." Why? What for? I looked up shyly to be mesmerized by his blue eyes. "I'm serious when I say this. To be honest, you're right. I'm worried. But worried about not only you but us. It's always about us. I never want us to feel apart. I feel like shit when we're not together. When we fight for stupid reasons, I feel like we're wasting our time. Right now, yeah, we can't be seen with each other. But we can soon. You're my everything, always remember that."

I opened my mouth but nothing came out. I just stared at him, the beautiful person. I went over to hug him, which was I all could really do. I held him tightly. I really wasn't going to see him until later today. I love feeling his warm embrace. I love the fact that he cares. I love him. 

But does he love me? He never told me that. 

I released him and smirked. "So, was the surprise the party?"

"Yeah, we'll go there after the performance."

"Cool. I'm excited!" He smiled knowing that I was fangirling over the fact that I'll be with other celebrities. "Oh shit, don't you have to go to the interview?" 

"Yeah, but it's alright."

"No you gotta go. Don't worry about me I'll be around the city."

"Ok, ok. Babe, you sure you'll be fine."

"Yeah, I'll see you later." I got my coat and purse. 

Luke got his coat and started to the door with me. He opened the door for me. Before we split ways, he kissed me on my cheek with his soft lips.

It's going to be a long ass day.

Luke P.O.V.

We were heading to the show and I was just tired. It's still early. I don't feel like talking, only to Lou. 

My mom's here too. It's so weird how she had to meet Lou this way. I love both of them. It's easy to tell one of them that and harder to tell the other. I should say it today. 

I mean I won't see Lou in months after this. If I tell her, we won't fall so apart, I guess. Do I? I mean it's so simple. All I have to say is three words. 

When we arrived, we sound checked for the one song we were doing. Oh yeah, we have an interview too. Damn. I mean interviews are fun sometimes.

• • • 

Interviewer: Hey, we're here with the boys of 5 Seconds of Summer! They're performing tonight at Times Square. So are you guys today?

Ashton: We're good, but tired as always. We had to wake up early to come here.

I: Aren't you guys excited? I mean it's the first time you're performing Times Square. What can we expect?

Michael: Of course!

A: Yeah, we always dreamed of doing this. I think you can expect an awesome show. 

Me: Don't forget a new song for the New Year. 

A: Yeah that too. Wait who wrote it again?

Calum: I worked on it with Luke, but he had most of the inspiration for it.

M: It has a guitar solo from me too! 

A: We're so stoked to play it tonight.

I: Great! 

A: You know we owe it all to our fans. They do everything for us and all we want to do is give back to them. 

I: Oh yeah, on top of performing Times Square. Your moms are here so how do you feel about that? I bet they are so proud of you guy for going this far after all these years.

Me: I love my mom. She's the best! 

C: Yeah, but you know I can't wait until we actually go home so I can eat my mom's spaghetti.

Me: I love your mom's spaghetti it's good!

A: Home, I really want to go home.

M: I want to go home so I can play video games all the time and fucking eat everything I want. 

I: Do you guys have anyone else who is special to you? Like a special someone.

A: Nah all of us are single.

I: What if you did find that someone tonight? Who would be your New Year's kiss?

M: I already found that special someone.

C: Really?

Me: Probably not me.

A: Oh god.

M: It's Luke. He's the love of my life!

C: I thought you were going to say me. I thought we had something together. But you were using me.

Me: Yay! I love you Michael! 

M: Calum, I saw you cheat on me with Ashton. How could you? This is why I'm choosing Luke over you, you whore! 

C: I didn't do anything! What does Luke have that I don't?

Me: Everything.

C: Shut up!

M: It doesn't have to only be one of you it could be both of you.

A: I'm left all alone.

Me: It's either me or Cal.

M: But...but

I: Anyways guys, what song are you going to perform?

Me: She Looks So Perfect

A: Our first hit single to remind everyone when we started.

Lou P.O.V.

"Why are they even performing that? Like can't they perform "If You Don't Know!" We all are still waiting. God why?" I exclaimed.

Rachael said, "Cálmate ya (Calm down already)! Seriously, you're going to scare people away from the salon."

"But, it's my boyfriend and his band I'm talking about. Look! At! That!"

Rachael rolled her eyes. "Stop it already you look and sound like a teenage girl." She continued cutting the lady's hair.

"I'm not even lying though."

"Déjame concentrar. (Let me concentrate) We'll talk after this alright."


I looked up at the TV. Can I just say that I still don't believe that he is my boyfriend? Damn, I mean like watching him on TV makes me think that I'm at my apartment fangirling over them. I have to leave tomorrow and it sucks. It's like having PCD. 

PCD. It stands for Post Concert Depression which is when your depressed after the fact that you went to the amazing concert. Then, it hits you that you have to leave. Leave your idols and your home because the venue is like your home. At home, you cry yourself to sleep. You don't feel like doing anything. You just want to relive that moment. There's no cure. The only way to feel better is to go to another concert. It's just a never ending cycle. 

I'm going to miss Luke again. I want to stay with him forever. But, hey, I get to party with them later.

Rachael was done with the lady. She did a really nice job and she even put on some highlights that complemented her hair. She definitely needs to do my hair next. 

As the lady left the salon, Cami walked right in. "What's up guys?"

"Not much, I was watching my boyfriend on TV," I replied. I giggled a little knowing that they weren't going to take me seriously. 

"Wow, really Lou." Cami laughed. 

Rachael added, "I know right." She laughed along with Cami. 

I went over to the salon door and locked it before I tried to explain what I meant. This is actually funnier for me than it is to them. 

"Why'd you do that?" Cami questioned.

"No reason." I swear I'm creeping them out instead. I'm done with myself. "Oh yeah, Rachael, I was wondering if you could straighten my hair since like I'm going to a party today."

"Yeah, of course. You have to pay me this time." I gave her an I-thought-you-were-my-friend-look. "Discounted price, though." 

Cami offered, "I'll join along and do your makeup later too."

"Thanks." I smiled. I sat down on the chair so that Rachael could start and looked down at my phone to find that Luke just texted me.

Luke: hey :-)

Me: hai

Luke: watcha up to

Me: nothin really just wanna hang with u

Luke: same

Me: u guys did great tho and MUKE lol

Luke: lol 

Me: oh yeah u never told me u guys r gonna perform a new song like WTF... i thought i got news earlier than the Fam

Luke: yeah hehe

Me: u suck

"Who are you even texting, Lou? You're like laughing and stuff," Cami commented.

I just looked at her and continued.

Luke: ...

Me: u there?

Luke: yeah u just hurt my feelings

Me: im srry :P

Luke: Do u wanna like FaceTime for a little while i'm in the car

Me: yeah ok hold up

I stated, "I was texting my boyfriend and now he want to FaceTime right now so yeah."

"Ok, we won't bother you," responded Cami.

Me: ok call me

Luke: yay i get to see ur face

My phone starts ringing. For some reason I'm like dying on the inside because I'm all excited and happy. I need a reality check again oops. I answered.


"HEYYY LOU!" Luke exclaimed.

He's so adorable ad hot right now I can't. "What's up?" I heard Ashton in the background. He was telling Luke that he want to be in the video too. Then, Michael started screaming. Oh god. "And you wanted to FaceTime." I giggled. 

Rachael stopped for a moment and Cami came closer. I looked back at them and they were astonished. "I

"I know. But get to see your face," Luke said.

"My ugly face. JK but like same I get to see yours too."

"My ugly face."

"Ok now your mocking me. Is Calum teaching you?"

"Maybe. But don't say that. You're so beautiful and that's the last thing I want to hear from you." Rachael and Cami still were staring at me and my phone. "Are those your friends?" 

"Yeah just hanging out here. Can you like tell me a lyric from that new song?"

"Why would I-"

Ashton interrupted, "Hey Lou!"

"Hey?" I think Michael stole Luke's phone because everything went black. After all these years, they still pick on Luke. I'm literally just done right now. 

"Shit-dick-fuck-balls!" Michael screamed.

"Michael just give Luke's phone back please, por favor."


"Calum! Can you please help at least?"

Suddenly the screen was all blurry and stuff. All I heard was Cal and Mikey fighting over the phone. Poor Luke. Why is he always getting bullied? 

"Um hey there." Cal said. Oh okay he got the phone back.

"Oh hey there Cal. Make sure no one steals Luke's phone again." 

He nodded. "Ok. You excited for tonight?" 

"Yeah, it's going to be awesome."

Then I heard Luke in the background and he explained, "Stop talking to Lou. It's like your trying to steal her from me. She's mine." He laughed.

"Alright I got to pass this to Luke your boring boyfriend." 

I giggled. "Just stop, that's my boring boyfriend and I'll always be with him."

He passed the phone back to Luke. "Hey babe." Luke threw me a cheesy smile. 

"Ok now you need to stop," I told him. 

Luke stated, "Really?" He made another face but this time trying to be sexy or something.

"Yeah really."

"Aw man, I have to go. We finally arrived at the radio station. I'll see you later though."

"Ok. I'll be stalking you."

"I know you will." He did some weird wink. 

"What even was that? Like you got something in your eye?"

"I don't know."

"Always trying to be cool and shit. Just be you because your just going to make me laugh." 

He chuckled. "Oh ok, bye Lou.


Now I miss him again. I swear there's never going to be one time where I don't. 

"So, wait, you weren't kidding when you said you were watching your boyfriend on the TV, were you?" Rachael asked. I nodded then laughed. "But how? Like if he's famous and what?"

Cami added, "What the fuck! Really? You have to tell us the story!"

"Ok, before like you run out and tell everyone. Can you guys keep a secret for a while? Because we're really trying to keep the relationship low key," I explained.

"You're lying. Lou, I don't believe you." Cami countered.

"I'm not. Ok do you guys want to watch 5SOS tonight? I'll get you guys tickets."


Rachael interjected, "Cállate, if she's offering us tickets that means she's not lying ok."

I said, "At least one of you-"

"Ok, ok, I believe you too," Cami responded.

"You guys promise right?" 

"We promise," Rachael and Cami said in unison. 

• • • 

"Thank you so much guys. I have to go and we'll meet up later," I stated. I looked in the mirror. "You guys just made magic actually seem real."

"Anytime. Bye," Cami said.

Rachael added, "Adios."

I started walking down the street. I was looking for the building where Luke said they were going to soundcheck but I didn't find it at all. I ended up so far away that there weren't as much traffic to see in the city. So I decided to call up Luke for the address again.

Me: Hi, again! 

Luke: Hey princess, are you almost here yet? 

Me: Not really, I mean can you give me the address again. 

Luke: Yeah, its-

Something grabbed me from behind. Who? What's happening? I started screaming.

Luke: Lou! Are you ok?!

I dropped my phone. Fuck! I felt a knife on me. Shit! I'm going to die! I'm going to die! I'm going to die! 

This person was so strong, I could get out of their hold. The last thing I saw only his piercing green eyes. Fuck! I'm scared!

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