"Everything is contingent, and there is also chaos."

Contingent (Adjective):
1. Dependent on something that is uncertain
2. Something that may or may not happen; possible


17. Chapter 16: Less

Lou P.O.V.

I'm freaking out. What does Ashton mean they aren't on break? What happened? OMG! What the fuck is happening!?

Ash: No, I'm not lying.

Me: Then what's the real reason?

Ash: We all just fought. Mikey started it by messing around with Luke. But, this time he went a bit overboard. Cal joined along and then stopped when he noticed what they were doing. I was trying to calm down all of them. It was just a mess.

Me: Wow.

Ash: Everyone got pissed and went their ways. I know where Cal is. Luke is with you. I don't know where Michael is.

Me: Oh god! Where are you now?

Ash: Going to your apartment.

Me: What the fuck?! Hold up!

Ash: Calm down, don't swear.

Me: Now's not the time, Ash, especially when I just found my boyfriend lied to me and you're coming over in a few!

Ash: Ok, calm down, Lou!

Me: I can't!

Ash: I'll see you later bye.

Me: Bye.

Why didn't Luke tell me this? I hate when people lie man, I hate it.

I marched out of the balcony to my desk where Luke was. "Luke Robert Hemmings. Why the fuck did you lie to me?" I exclaimed.

Luke said,"What? Calm down, Lou!"

"No. I just got off the phone with Ashton. He told me he was looking for you and that you guys weren't on break. You never told me this!"

"I was going to tell you but--"

"But what? You could've told me this when you first came. I would've been fine, but you know what, now Ashton is coming."

"Wait, Ashton!"

"Ye-" There was a knocking at the door. "See! I didn't even believe him either." I went to go get the door and found Ash. "Come on in."

"Luke, you have to come back. We've canceled so many shows already," Ash explained.

I agreed, "Cancelled shows! I'm so done! Luke you better just go back to L.A."

"Not after what happened. I hate you guys," Luke countered.

Ash reasoned, "C'mon, it was just a small fight. Besides, Michael always says those things to you."

"Yeah, but--" Luke started. There was another knocking at the door.

They both turned to me like I knew this was going to happen. I interrupted,"I seriously don't know who's that." I went over to get the door. Ayanna was there. "What are you doing here?"

"Well, I just wanted to hang out with you guys and what not. So I came!" Ayanna answered. She looked over my shoulder. "Wait, is that Ashton Irwin!"

I moved so she wouldn't see. " that's not Ashton. What do you mean? It's just Luke and I."

"You're lying! Stop lying!" She invited herself in. "Oh my god! It is Ash! Lou stop being rude and introduce me."

"Ok Jesus! I was in the middle of something and you just invite yourself over."

"Ooo what is this something?"

"Problem with the band."

"Interesting, but I want to see Ash."

"You might as well."

Ayanna walked into the conversation between Luke and Ashton.

Ashton asked,"Who's she?"

"My friend. Anyways, did we come to some kind of consensus and what not?" I said.

Luke answered,"Yeah, I forgave my stupid band and now we're going to L.A."

"Yeah, Cal is in the hotel and we got to find Mikey,"Ash added.

"I mean I just got here,"Ayanna interrupted,"but can I come along too?"

"Of course you can." Ash smiled at Ayanna.

"Um, well I'm going to get my stuff so I'll be in my room," I said.

Luke continued,"Yeah, I got to get my stuff in Lou's room too."

I quickly went into my room before Luke came. I seriously don't even want to talk with him. I'll get a change of clothes because I think I might staying overnight there. I don't know, probably I'll take a flight back the same day. I'll bring a backpack just in case. Luke walked in and got his stuff together.

"Lou?" He said. I ignored him. "Lou?" I continued. "Lou, just listen to me." I still continued. "Please, I didn't mean to lie. Just please talk to me."

"You know what Luke, I don't want to talk with you at the moment. I'm a bit tired and you still could've at least told me. I'm still upset. I'm literally not playing around here,"I responded.

"Babe, I didn't mean to upset you. I just thought it was better if you didn't know until later on." He came over to hold me close to him.

"Don't even touch me, ok. I'm not in the mood. Look away I gotta put some jeans on."

I changed into some plain jeans and I left on Luke's black dress shirt on. Even if I told Luke to look away, I still felt eyes on me. When I turned around, Luke had on his black skinny jeans. Sometimes I wonder how 5SOS put on their black skinny jeans so fast. How? Anyways, Luke had a guilty face painted on him. Yup, I bet he did look.

I went out of the room before he could say another word. I found that Ayanna and Ash chatting together. I was wondering what that was because all I could hear from the room was giggling and talking.

I broke their conversation,"Ash, how did you come here by?"

"Taxi and it's still outside. I told the driver to wait for me."

"Ok." I went to the door and Luke tried again with me. "I told you already, no." He left to go to the taxi. He looked like a sad puppy but I just can't right now. I turned to Ash and Ayanna again. Oh my god, they're flirting with each other! That made me smile like aw Ayanna and Ash. I ship it! "Guys, let's go already."

They followed along and we we're off to the airport.

• • •

L.A, I've been here before. I used to live here when I was younger and I haven't been here ever since. I remember how I was always a loner in school. I was only second grade. No one talked to me and everyone judged me. It's the reason why I don't talk a lot, only to my closest friends. The thing that made me happy and forget about the reality, was my parents. I remember used to walk to an ice cream shop with my mom. I always I got like chocolate chip, rocky road, or rainbow sherbet. Now here I am again. The weather's still nice, haha.

We walked into the lobby of the hotel 5SOS stayed at.

Ash started,"I'll get you guys a room to stay in while you're here."

"Thanks,"I said. I sat down on one of the couches in the lobby waiting for Ash to get the room. Luke seemed like he wanted come over, but didn't. I guess he got the message. Ayanna sat next to me. "Hey, someone seems happy."

"Shut up, Lou,"she responded. She bumped me with her arm.

"Well then, I can't express my opinion." I bumped her back.

Ash signaled us to come with them. Ayanna and I followed them into the elevator.

I remembered when Luke snuck me in their tour bus. Yup and I had to climb all those stairs, haha. Wait, where's the L.A. Fam at though? I guess they're really chill or something. I haven't been on Twitter for a while either. That's because I'm literally with 5SOS, so I don't really need the updates. I don't know what the Fam knows or what they're doing. What's wrong with me? I haven't actually been fangirling.

Again, we followed Ash this time to our room.

"Here's your room girls. We're in rooms 105 and 106 once you guys are done putting your things in," Ash explained. He handed me the key.

Ayanna said,"Okay, thanks." She gave him a cheeky smile. Once the door closed behind us Ayanna started,"What's up with you and Luke? Like you guys looked so apart. Yesterday, you guys were all over each other."

"Long story short, Ayanna, he lied. He lied that they were on break. They canceled lots of shows because of this,"I answered.

"No wonder the Fam is a bit out of control right now."

"I haven't been on, so I didn't know what hell was happening. I leave for a few seconds and then when I come back I just like "Woah, what is this!"'

"But, didn't he apologize to you?"

"Yeah, but still I just can't right now. It's the lie, Ayanna, it's the lie. I don't cope with lies."

"You're going to forgive him at some point today. You're too sweet to keep this act going." She gave a me a I-how-you-are look.

"No, you don't know me Ayanna, so shut up." I walked out of the room to the boys room. Calum opened the door. "Hi, Cal." I looked behind me and found that Ayanna followed me. "Before you ask, she's my friend, Ayanna."

I invited myself into the room. That's right! It's 'cause I'm badass and I don't need anyone telling me to come in. Just kidding! I just don't feel like talking right now and I won't be talking for a while after this.

Luke P.O.V.

Lou walked into the room and seems to me that she really doesn't give a fuck about anyone at the moment.

"Ok, so you guys made up and everything," Lou started.

Ash responded, "Yeah pretty much an-"

"Now where's Michael?"

"I was going to say that but-"

"Who was the last one he contacted though?" No one answered her. "Then, I guess it was me 'cause he texed me yesterday. He was drunk too. So, I guess we'll have to search the city of Los Angeles for a Michael Clifford?"

I joined, "Yeah."

"And Michael doesn't even socialize and you guys made him! Like seriously! How are going find him?" Lou added.

Ayanna suggested, "Why don't we break up into to two groups? Me and Ash and you, Luke, and Cal."

"I guess-"

Ashton cut her off this time. Haha! "Yeah, let's do that!"

I could tell Lou didn't like the idea of being with me. But, I do. I mean I want her to understand that I just made a mistake.

I continued, "Yeah we should." I looked at her and she looked right at me with an annoyed face.

"I don't mind at all. Sounds cool," Calum said.

"Ok," Lou paused, "I guess we should get going."

Ashton and Ayanna raced out of the room. Calum stood there and waited for what Lou and I were going to do next.

"Just to be clear, Luke, I don't want you close to me all. Let's go then," Lou explained.

I just looked at annoyed like she did. Then when her back was turned, I mocked her. Cal saw me and was keeping his laugh in.

As we walked out, Calum whispered to me, "What's up with her?"

"She's upset that I just told a small lie," I replied

"Over reacting much? She'll get over it eventually."

"You think so. I mean right after she found out started acting this."

"Yeah, trust me. I know everything."

"Really? You haven't had a girlfriend in a long time. What do you mean?"

"Don't start."

Soon we were walking on the streets of L.A. clueless of where to go. Calum and I just followed Lou.

Cal asked,"Where exactly are we going?"

"I don't know. Um, where does Michael like to go?" Lou responded.

"He likes pizza, video games, and to sleep."

"Guess we should check pizza places or fast food restaurants then."

We looked and looked and we still couldn't find the jackass. We mostly just went in restaurants. It made me hungry. I'm tired of walking so much.

There was a McDonald's in front of us. I want to eat already. "Lou, let's just get some lunch at McDonald's," I complained.

"Ok, whatever."

Cal and I ordered the food while Lou found a table for us. She got us a table right next to the Play Place playground. When we were eating it was so awkward and so quiet. Then Calum made small comment. 

"Lou, isn't that like Luke's shirt?" Cal asked.

She answered, "Maybe." She looked away. She knows it my shirt and she loves it. 

That playground is so tempting to go on. Fuck it! I'm going in there!

I climbed up into the playground. I went into the tube and crawled. It was tight but worth it. I felt like a little kid again.

"Luke! Oh my god! Get down from there! Luke!" Lou exclaimed.

Yup, I surely felt like a little boy again.

Lou decided to take the matter into her own hands. She climbed up and crawled into the opposite end where she could face me. I looked down and found Calum chuckling at what was happening.

"Luke, what the hell are you doing? You look so stupid here! A 23 year old guy in a McDonald's playground for children 12 and under like what the fuc-"

I crawled close enough that way I could brush my lips against hers. She gave in for the first few seconds but then backed up.

"I hate you. Just get down from here."

I said, "Not until you say please." I gave her a smirk.


I stole another kiss from her and then crawled out as fast as I could before she could say anything. I met up with her and she was about to say something but didn't.

"So, what are doing now guys?" Cal questioned. He had a huge, cheesy smile on his face.

Lou was trying to keep her act on, but I knew her guard was going down. Yup, my plan worked.

"Um, I guess we can start asking people on the street, you know. Like to see if anyone saw him," Lou replied.

"Alright, we should go then," I suggested.

After a half an hour, we still didn't find Michael. But I did have fun making silly faces at Lou. She tried not to giggle, but hid her smiled instead. She's breaking from her act little by little.

Calum commented, "Why can't Michael be easier to find?"

"Yeah," I agreed.

I saw Lou approached someone. It was a girl with black straight hair and had streaks of blonde highlights. She was wearing black skinny jeans and a "Pierce The Veil" band shirt.

Lou started, "Hi, have you seen a guy with blue and purple hair and his name is Michael around here?"

"You know it's a bit rude that you don't introduce yourself to a stranger like me," She responded.

It was obvious that Lou didn't like her sarcasm. "I'm Louisette, Lou for short, and this is Luke and Calum. So, have you seen him?"

"My name's Evelyn. When you mean Michael, you mean Clifford?"

"Yeah, that's the one."

"Why do you ask?"

I joined in, "Michael's in a band and well we had a little fight. Now were looking for him."

"He didn't tell me he was in a band! Damn. So, the fight was that fuckin' bad that he ran away from you guys?"

This Evelyn girl seemed to be punk rock at first sight, but didn't know our band. Now I know how Lou feels. But, our band sucks anyways.

"Yeah. He started it though and now we're looking for a lost Michael Clifford," Cal added.

"Wait," Lou said, "so how'd you meet Michael?"

"Long story and I'll tell it. I was in the club last night near the bar. I saw this hot guy aka Michael and he came my way. He tried to get me with a shitty pick up line and I bought it. I probably brought it 'cause I was just a bit tipsy at the moment. We hung together the rest of the night. We were both wasted by the end of the night. I felt like shit and stuff. I still have a fuckin' headache right now. Then, the asshole told me he didn't have place to stay for the night. I invited him over to my place. He stayed and fucker just left like an hour ago," Evelyn explained.

"Wow, um that's a lot. So where did he say he was going?"

"He said he was going to do something with video games? I don't fucking know."

"Like a Game Stop or arcade?"

"I told you I don't fucking know!"

"Jesus calm down! I guess we'll search at both. But thanks anyways."

"Yeah, no problems. By the way, tell Michael to text me."


"You're so curious aren't you? Keep asking me all these fuckin' questions and shit. I can just say he left me hanging that's all."

We said bye and walked away.

"She sure knows how to swear," Calum sassed.

I added,"Just like Michael!"

"Coincidence. I think not!" Lou continued. She doesn't seem to be that mad with me anymore. "Where do you think we should check first? Game Stop or the arcade?"

"I can go look in the Game Stop real quick," Cal said.

"Ok." It was just Lou and I now. Just waiting outside of the store. "I know what you've been doing this whole time and it doesn't work on me."

I countered, "I don't know what you're talking about. I'm not doing anything."

Lou gave me a long look. I gave her a wide, cheesy smile. Then, she rolled her eyes at me. Soon after, Calum came out of the Game Stop looking disappointed.

"He wasn't in there. I guess we have to look in the arcade then," Cal said.

We continued walking towards the arcade. When we arrived there, we separated in order to find Michael. I couldn't find him anywhere. I thought that it would've been easy to find that highlighter hair jackass. All of a sudden, Calum had Michael next to his side.

I immediately ran to hug Mikey. Michael hugged back and then pushed me off.

"Get off me! I've missed you but not that much," Michael explained.

Lou came and her eyes widened. Lou exclaimed, "We found you finally! Like you know how hard it was! You were like some lost kitten! Oh my god!"

"Now he's going to be with us forever and ever because he promised," Calum commented.

"Group hug!"

We all hugged Mikey. He made it seem like he didn't enjoy it, but did.

Michael asked, "I have one question. Where the fuck is Ashton?"

"Oh," I responded,"Ash and Lou's friend went out looking for you too. But, I don't know where they are."

"Just texted Ayanna. She said they'll come back to the hotel after they eat lunch," Lou interrupted.

Mikey continued, "Wait, Lou's friend? Never mind. But let's get back already."

"Oh, Mikey, I think some girl wanted you to text her," Cal remembered.

"Who? Evelyn?"

"Yeah, that was her name. She helped us find you."


Lou said, "Well, let's go guys! I'm tired of walking the whole day!"

• • •

By the time we got back it was really late. While we were going back, I got a hold of Lou. She finally let her guard down and we ended up holding hands all the way back. She's too good. She can never stay mad at me forever.

As we went back to our rooms, I wanted to go to Lou's room just to talk with her.

She opened the door. "What do you want Luke?" Lou questioned.

"I just wanted to talk with you," I replied. I had a small smile on my face.

"Ok." I came in and sat on the bed. "What did you want to say then?"

"I wanted to say that I'm sorry. I've should've never lied to you."

"I thought I wasn't going to tell you this, but I forgive you. Just tell me nothing like this happens again. I was so shocked when I heard something else. I don't want anything wrong to happen between us. Please ok."

"I won't do anything like that. It scared you and I don't want you to feel that way."

She smiled and hugged me tight. Our lips brushed against each other once more. I cupped her face in hands as we kissed passionately. We stopped and gazed into each other's eyes. I loved looking in her eyes. So beautiful.

Lou P.O.V.

Yeah, I guess I was being a bit harsh with Luke. 

Right after we stopped kissing, Ayanna opened the door.

"What are you guys doing?" Ayanna asked.

I responded, "Hey Ayanna! We were just talking and stuff."

"I guess I should go," Luke said.

He left the room. Now it was only Ayanna and I.

"So, while Calum, Luke, and I were looking for Michael, what were you and Ashton doing?" I questioned.

"Looking for Michael," she replied. I gave her a long look. "And hanging out. You know, nothing more."

"Really? I don't think so. You've acting very different lately and that's not because you just met 5SOS. I mean it kind of is, but more of the reason is Ashton."

Ayanna had a nervous smile on her face. My suspisions are right! I knew it! I'm not stupid! "Maybe, you're right. I mean he is my fav and what not. He seems kind of interested in me, I don't know. Shut up already!"

"Ok?! Jesus cálmate (calm down)! Damn, you don't have to be so mean."

"It's late and we've out the whole time. I want to sleep already."

"Yeah, I'm tired AF and we'll we got to go back home tomorrow too."

• • •

Right after I woke up the next morning, I went on Twitter. Fuck! Why do I forget that the Fam is everywhere?! There's more pictures of Luke and I! I mean you can't really see my face (thank the lord) because of my hair. All I see down my timeline are reactions like: OMG WHO IS DAT BISH, "Luke has a girlfriend" IS DAT BULLSHIT I HEAR?!, WHERE DA FUCK DID SHE COME FROM. The Fam always falls apart because of these things. I'm scared about making it "official" like you know what I don't even want to think about it. I don't know when we are though.

Ayanna woke up right after she found me making faces at what I was reading on my phone. We got ready to home. I don't want to go home. I have so much work to do and I don't want to be away from Luke again. 

We met up with 5SOS at the lobby. God, I went through this before why?! I don't want to leave! No!

I started, "I guess we have to say goodbye. Again. I mean why don't we just say "Hello" like that's way easier and happier."

"'Cause we're leaving duh. Lou stop trying to be Tumblr," Ayanna interrupted. 

"Really, I was just sayi-" 

Calum interjected,"Bye! We're really going to miss you guys!"

"Yeah, thanks for helping out," Ashton added.

Michael continued, "Helping out or dealing with our bullshit. I'm going to miss you guys too."

"We'll miss you two," Luke said. 

We all exchanged hugs. I noticed Ayanna and Ash took the longest time hugging. I'm so right though, like there's got to be something happening there. 

As I hugged Luke, I whispered, "When will I see you again?"

"Soon. And this time we'll see each other longer because I need to make it up to you," he answered.

"Ok. You promise right?"

"I promise." 

"Oh yeah, I'm keeping your shirt." I giggled. "I like it a lot."

He laughed. "Yeah you can keep it." He kissed me one last time before I left and then on my forehead. "Take of yourself."

Ayanna and I left to take a taxi to the airport. I didn't want to cry. I don't like to cry. I don't like crying in front of others. But eventually, I did when we were in the plane and I was looking out the window. Why do we have to be apart?

Luke P.O.V.

I know Lou is going to be sad for the rest of the day and so am I. We'll see each other again. I know how I'm going to surprise her. She's going to be so speechless.

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