Contingent

"Everything is contingent, and there is also chaos." Contingent (Adjective): 1. Dependent on something that is uncertain 2. Something that may or may not happen; possible

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2. Chapter 1: My Life

Three months later...

I ran right into Starbucks disturbing the usual calm vibe of the people in there. I had my laptop in my hands and quickly went over to the table where my friend Nathan was. He looked at me with confused wide eyes. But I was just focused on my laptop.

"Good Morning! Lou?" He started.

"Shut up! I'm trying to get Meet and Greet tickets to finally meet 5SOS, ok! This is very serious! I need to get them or my life is over!" I explained.

"How rude? I don't even know why I'm your friend in the first place. Look at the way you treat me."

"Nate, really like you know I take my band seriously! Oh my god! Sale is starting! Don't talk to me!"

Under his breath he said, "No life."

I am so focused right now that I don't give a fuck about what Nate is saying. I think I just got the Meet and Greet tickets! Oh my god! No! I did it! I got them!

I got up from my chair and screamed, "Yes! I got it! I'm going to meet 5SOS!"

Everyone turned his or her face towards me. It's a crazy fangirl who couldn't keep herself in for a moment. I stand there embarrassed and rapidly sit back in my chair again.

"See Lou. This is way I say you don't have a life."

"Shut up! Like I got my tickets and I'm happy now." I stuck my tongue at him.

I met Nathan in English class. This time he sat next to me thinking that I would be a good friend. His judgment is somewhat better than mine because I'm a good but a bad friend. Nate is also gay meaning that he judges my love for 5SOS especially Michael. He's always saying that he's the worst looking one when he's beautiful. In addition, he's from the UK and the story is that he came here to Florida because he felt like it. Ever since, we've been besties, but he still doesn't understand my love for 5SOS!

"You're the one who screamed, "I got 5SOS tickets," making everyone stop what they're doing and look over here. When those people turned around, they saw 21 year old looking like a teenage girl. And I'm the stupid one huh," Nate told me.

I responded, " You know what Nate? Can you just shut your motherfucking mouth?"

Nathan smiled. "I lub you!"

I checked the time and I was going to be late for my philosophy class. "Oh shit! I'm going to be late! I lub you too! We'll text ok."

I exited Starbucks the same way I entered which was very fast. Once I reached the classroom after running, I was tired from running. I looked up at the clock. I just made it.

I hate my seat in my philosophy class. Deciding to sit next to Dana in the beginning was the worst decision I've ever made. She's such a bitch and such a horrible person. Dana is the typical popular whore. She slept with literally everyone and her specialty is stealing boyfriends. I don't know how she does that shit, but she's just stupid.

Took my seat next to her. "Nerd, came late today huh?" she remarked. I ignored her. "You can't even keep a boyfriend. I bet that's the reason you're always single."

She's pushing my fucking buttons. "I really don't care," I said.

"That's what all the lone ass bitches say."

Yup, I'm pretty much done. "Sorry, I can't hear you with all the dicks in your mouth."

She was too late to comeback. Professor Harrison walked into the room and wrote the words end and beginning on the board. Thank god because I was about to kill her.

"As you can see, today we're going to talk about beginnings and endings. A beginning by definition is the start and an end is the last part. But what really is a beginning? Is a beginning when you change or start something new? Then again we start at birth. Is an end really an end? Or is it when you die?" Professor Harrison explained.

Christian raises his hand. He has green eyes and brown hair that is quiffed up. One more thing he's my ex. I dated him during freshman year (I'm currently a junior) and we fell apart. Ever since, I've been single for about a year. I didn't notice he was in my philosophy class until the second day. Oh well, it's not like I'm going to talk to him and stuff. It's called avoiding, duh!

Christian asked, "What about books or movies?"

"Books and movies have a definite beginning and end. But when the book or movies ends does it really end or does it continue because life continues? I want you guys to write about that," Professor Harrison replied.

Jesus, why more writing? I don't want to write. Short response I guess?

A beginning is when something new is introduced into your life. There are always changes you are going to go through and new things that come in your way. An end doesn't exist. Things keep going on and on. Even when you're dead what lives on is what is eternal about you. It's part of Newton's Laws of Motion. An object that is in motion will stay in motion unless something stops it.

I look up and the class was over. Time is stupid man. Can't wait for the day to end.

As I exit the classroom, Christian is coming towards me. Why is he coming my way? Go away! I'm serious go away! I keep walking away!

"Hey! Lou!" Christian exclaimed.

Fuck! I stop and turn around. He comes more toward me. I said, "Hi?"

"Lou, I'm sorry to stop you and stuff. But I just wanted to ask you how you were doing? I mean we've haven't seen each other in a while."

"I'm good. Look Chris, I got to go to biology and I don't want to be late."

"How about we hang out another time? That way we can catch up."

"Yeah, sure? Um, yeah. Ok. Bye." I leave him stranded there. This motherfucker wants to come back with me. Oh hell no! I'm not in the mood.

• • •

I enter my apartment and go straight to my couch. I lay on there flat like a starfish. I start to text Nate when I hear a knocking on the door.

"Nate? What are you here?" I asked.

Nate replied, "I wanted to hang." He gave me an awkward wink.

"I don't have the time. I have to study."

"But you want to procrastinate don't you?"

"Yeah! Ok guess what happened today?"

We went over and sat on my couch.

"What happened? This better not be about 5SOS or I'm just going to leave," Nate informed.

"Shut up. You saw me get the Meet and Greet tickets. Anyways, Christian seemed like he want to get back together. Like what the fuck!"

"Lou, relax. Probably he just wants to be friends with you. Or wants to finally finish what he started. I mean do you still like him?"

"Finish what he started? Really? I'm so done Nate."

"Answer that other question. Do you still like Christian?"

"Maybe. Maybe not. He still looks good. But I can't really. I'm a fangirl and I think I can get me some 5SOS."

"Here we go again with 5SOS. Just admit it! You are not going to date a band member from 5SOS. Never! No Luke! Ok! You're always fucking daydreaming about those guys when there is people out there that actually want you!"

Did Nate just? No! He got to get out of my place, man! I'm literally done! "Look 5SOS does care about fans! I don't care about the other people! I'm happy ok! I don't need to be reminded of the past! Can you just shut the fuck up? Every time you come here saying shit about 5SOS and that is not allowed! Get out! I'm tired! I don't want to hear anything wrong about 5SOS they are my life!"

"Look at what you're saying! You're crazy! Good bye!"

Nate leaves my apartment. I'm left here alone and angry. I don't want to get back with anyone. I'm going to write to each member of 5SOS a letter about how much I love them. I'll give it to them tomorrow and it'll be awesome. I get to meet my idols finally for the first time!

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