I ponder of something great
My lungs will fill and then deflate
They fill with fire, exhale desire
I know it's dire
My time today.
A/N: This is gonna be an all Josh chapter cuz he's my smol bean.
I cant see.
I can't feel.
All I see is black.
I only feel numb.
I want to stay numb.
I never want to wake up.
I woke up in a cold sweat. All I see is a blinding white light. Matter of fact all I see is white. I hear a constant beeping noise. I finally snap to my senses, and I spring up in bed. I do this, only to find out that I'm in a hospital. I feel a sharp pain go through my entire body. My chest huts, my hands and feet are cramping, I feel dizzy, and I'm having trouble breathing. My head hurts like a real bitch. A nurse comes in to check on me.
"Mr. Dun, you're awake!" she chirped.
"Why am I here?"
"You had a severe anxiety attack and you were hyperventilating, causing you to become nauseous, and lose consciousness."
"I'm confused, all I remember is running outside, calling an ambulance and-"
My eyes widened and my hands shook.
I started to cry.
"Where is Tyler? Please tell me he's okay! Please don't tell me he's dead! No, no, NO! TELL ME HE'S ALIVE!"
I was now on my kneeling on the floor, tears flooding out onto my face as I tugged on the nurse's shirt.
"Joshua, I need you to get back into your bed, you've been out for two consecutive days. You can't make sudden movements like this, it's putting too much strain on your mind and body."
"NO! NO! I NEED TO SEE TYLER! I NEED TO KNOW IF HE'S OKAY!" I cried out.
"Do you really need to see him?" she asked.
"YES! I'LL DO ANYTHING TO SEE HIM, I LO-" I finally came to a conclusion. I really did like him, matter of fact, I was in love with him. Butterflies fluttered in my stomach, just the thought of him made me calm down.
"I want to see him, because I love him." I asked with confidence, something I haven't really worked with for a while.
The nurse tucked me into a wheelchair, and rolled me through the halls into an elevator. We went to the thirtieth floor. We got into the room, and Valerie was nowhere to be seen. I wanted to cry as soon as I saw him in the state he was in. He had small cuts and bruises all over his face. The doctor had told me he was in a coma, and I broke down in front of everyone. He had a broken collarbone, a concussion, a torn ligament in his leg, a fractured wrist, and a laceration on his chest and left leg. I felt so bad, and I felt even worse when I noticed he had a machine to support his breathing. I cried harder, as I was getting attention from doctors and he was in worse condition than me.
Valerie never showed up, I had asked if she ever came to visit after the accident, and they said no. I decided to spend the night in his hospital room, because Val was being a bitch. The nurses said that I only had to take a week of psychiatric rehab to recover from my anxiety. After they said this, they recommended a therapist and I would be home free. At about three in the morning I heard a soft voice, calling me from the "bed" I was sleeping on. Tyler was mumbling my name in his coma.
"Juh-Jo-J-Josh" I could barely make out the mumbling.
"J-Josh... I l-love y-you..." he whispered quietly. My heart sank.
He- he loved me? I thought he was straight. He is "dating" Valerie. Could I be mishearing him? I saw Tyler's phone flash next to his things. I grabbed it. Clash of clans was sending him notifications.
'What a nerd.' I thought sadly.
I then saw that he had a text from Val, from a few minutes before the accident.
It read, 'Hey Tyler, I don't know how to put this. I... want to break up. This isn't really working out, I know we were planning to have lunch together, and I was going to tell you then. I... I just can't handle being with a famous person like you. Don't get me wrong, I love how you're becoming successful, but we never get time to be together because you're always so busy. I don't think I can handle your over dramatic emotions too, you're just so sensitive. So I guess this is goodbye, Tyler Joseph...'
I read the rest of the texts, angry and sad.
'Fine then! Be like this you emo freak. Go wallow in your "depression" and be all suicidal and shit! I don't give a damn if you kill yourself, I can't put up with your shit anyways.'
I felt so bad, was I going to tell him? I didn't want to think about it anymore. I got on Tyler's bed and curled up next to him. I could feel the warmth of his body, the beating of his gentle heart. I saw him give off a little smile and I could only think of the tune of "Missing You" by All Time Low. I kissed his forehead and fell back asleep with him in my arms.
"You'll be okay."
A/N: LONGEST CHAPTER I'VE WRITTEN YET *light applause* I'M SO PROUD OF MYSELF AND I WANNA GIVE A SHOUTOUT TO ALEC BECAUSE HE WAS THE ONLY REASON I DECIDED TO MAKE A NEW CHAPTER!!!!111!!!1!1!!!!!!!1!!