Jacob kissed me soft at first and then went to deepen it; I unconsciously intertwined my hands in his soft silky hair. I had longed for this, someone to caress me and be there for me knowing they wouldn't just pick up and leave, so I went with it. Our breathing started to quicken and my heart was hammering; I swore it was about to burst out of my chest any second.
Jacob made one swift motion, roughly placing his hands on my hips, picking me up and setting my down on his lap. I wrapped my legs around his waist hooking my feet together so that I was straddling him. Our lips never parting, when I moved my head to the side to catch my breath he trailed kisses down my neck to the indent of my collar bone.
"We better stop before Charlie comes out looking to see where I have vanished to." I panted, afraid to look Jacob directly in the eyes. I didn't want to stop but I didn't want to lead him on either, especially with you know who on my mind.
"Bella I know you don't want me to stop" I saw him smirk out of the corner of my eye, and he was right I didn't want him to stop, I could get used to this; having someone who was strong embrace me with the gentlest of touches. But my mind would instinctively go straight back to that bronzed hair God.
"You're right I don't want you to stop, but we can't stay here I don't want anyone to disrupt us" I winked and he caught what I was hinting at.
"Bella you know you deserve to be happy and I believe that I can do that" he was staring at me intently now trying to read me. He was right I did deserve to be happy and I thought I was once upon a time, until he burst my bubble.
He leaned down and kissed the tip of my nose before settling me on my feet and before we set out towards the house I stopped him "Hey listen Jake, I believe that you would make me happy too." I smiled up at him just staring in his rough eyes.
He gave me his excited grin once more before pulling me into one of his bear hugs "Can't… Breathe… Jake…" he immediately released me and I wobbled slightly before regaining my stance.
"You wont regret this Bella, I promise you that I will never hurt you" and part of me believed him.
"You better not" is what I wanted to say, but instead I just quietly followed behind him.
I yanked my hand out of Jacobs before entering the small red house, and shoved them deep into my pockets. Charlie was in front of the TV with a beer perched in his hand. His focus was distracted by the game playing in front of him, so it took him a moment to notice us enter and sit on the couch. "Hey what are you kids up to?" he eyed me suspiciously
"Oh you know the same ol shenanigans; sex, drugs, and rock and roll" I heard Jacob stifle a laugh and Charlie's eyes immediately darted to him, letting him know that he was not amused. But I could see a hint of a smile deep down by the slight twitch of his stash.
"Hardy har har!" he returned his eyes to the TV set and remained quiet until Billy wheeled in and announced that dinner was ready.
The kitchen was a small room with a small table so we all squeezed in around it, bumping elbows and knees, with a sorry here and there. Billy had Jacob grab an extra chair from out back since the table only sat four, I offered to eat outside but they wouldn't have it they wanted to use this time to catch up. Throughout dinner several times I would look up and come across to catch Jacob looking at me, he didn't break the stare and I wondered what he was thinking when he looked at me, what did he see that everyone else didn't.
I quickly put my gaze back down on my plate, I barely touched my dinner moving it around so that it looked like I was enjoying it not to be rude, "Billy may I please use your bathroom?"
"You know you don't have to ask Bella, but yes you may you know where it is" they picked up their conversation as soon as I left the room and headed towards the bathroom. I needed to get out of there and have a second to myself, I shut the door and quietly locked it behind me; I turned towards the mirror catching my reflection, my face was flushed and my lips were a little swollen, my hair was frizzed out from the damp weather outside. I ran my fingers through it acting like a comb it didn't do much of a difference but it was good enough for now.
I turned the faucet on warm and filled the basin, I lowered my head down and plunged my face in the soothing water, and it loosened me some. I closed my eyes remembering a time when I was happy, my mind went to when I was four years old walking down the beach hand in hand with my mothers, splashing in the water as the waves came rolling in. I remember my mother picking me up under my arms and swinging me around in a circle I was giggling so much I had a hard time catching my breath.
A knock on the door brought me back to reality, I gasped for air as soon as my face came out of the water. "Bella are you alright in there?" Jacob's voice was low and muffled by the separation of the door between us but I was still able to understand him.
"Yeah, one second" I closed my eyes once more and the tears started to cascade down my cheeks, I stifled a sob into the towel so he wouldn't hear me.
"Ok" I heard footsteps and what sounded like the screen door open and slam shut
I hurried and wiped my face along with the tears in the towel and took a deep breath before exiting the bathroom. Charlie and Billy were still in the kitchen chatting, so I quickly made my way outside to find Jacob. He was leaning against the rear of my truck looking down at his hands; something shiny was dangling from his fingers. He didn't hear me approach behind him. He quickly looked up startled and his hands flew behind his back he looked embarrassed.
"Sorry I didn't mean to scare you" I said as I moved my head trying to peek and see what was behind his back "so what's that you got there?" I nudged my chin out indicating what he was holding.
"Hmm who me?" he asked looking around as if he didn't know who I was talking to
"Yes you, I'm looking at you aren't I?" I said placing my hands on my hips raising my eyebrow.
His eyes darted back to the ground and he kept shifting his weight between feet "Oh it's just a little something for you, but I want to wait to give it to you"
"Why can't you give it to me know?" I didn't mean for that to come out sounding rude, and I hope he didn't think it was.
"I kind of wanted to wait until it was just you and me alone at a better time"
Good thing my face was already flushed because this brought a blush that crept up my neck to my cheeks. I've never really thought about spending time alone with Jacob like that, but now that he put the thought into my head I couldn't help but imagine what it would be like. Having his strong rough hands all over my body, having his lips on mine exploring every inch and vise versa. This brought on another blush.
"Oh ok, well how about we meet tomorrow night. Do you think you can sneak out and meet me?"
This caused him to look up and smile "What do you think I am, four? Of course I can sneak out" he furrowed his brow "Where exactly am I meeting you?"
"Let's see… how about we meet at La Push?"
"Ok sounds good to me" he moved in to give me another bear hug and gently brushed his lips over mine stricking Goosebumps along my flesh.