Capri – Colbie Caillat
Almost a month had passed since that day I saw Hunter sing at the coffee shop. That day felt so much like a dream: it began with seeing Hunter in the coffee shop, he then bought me the best decaf vanilla latte I had ever had, after that Melissa and I did some much needed retail therapy, Louis and I talked for the first time since August, I saw Hunter perform, him and I talked all night long, and then Hunter texted me goodnight. This is the longest I had been happy since the summer, and it’s because of Hunter. His smile and infectious laughter has brightened my days. When Hunter and I are together I am always contemplating whether or not to thank him for bringing the happiness to my life. But I was also afraid to tell Hunter how much he means to me, because he may not feel the same. I don’t know what I would do without Hunter in my life. All I can imagine is that I would still be deep in depression with no signs of ever being truly happy. I don’t want to go back to those days… ever.
Hunter and I had gotten so close with one another since that day. I would actually look forward to my British Literature class now, and the times that we weren’t in class together we would be texting each other. We texted practically all day long except while we were working. Hunter works as a waiter at a steakhouse in downtown Raleigh. I might be biased but I think that Hunter makes an adorable waiter. Melissa, Aiden, and I have gone to visit him at work numerous times. Even Aiden and Hunter were getting closer with one another. They could talk to each other about cars for hours on end. Melissa would tease Aiden for having a bromance with Hunter. On the days I was working Hunter would visit me at my job in the bookstore. Somedays I would be in the back and Melissa would tell my over the headsets that my boyfriend was here. I always knew she was referring to Hunter. Hearing that he was coming to visit me would always, without fail, evoke the biggest smile on my face. With every day that was passing us by, I knew my feelings for Hunter were only getting stronger. I was interrupted from my wonderful thoughts by my roommate yelling at me.
“Rian, get up! You have your doctor’s appointment in an hour” Melissa said, as she pulled my covers off me.
“Oh shit that is today” I gasped as I jumped out of bed.
“You are so damn lucky that I remember this stuff for you” Melissa scolded.
“Hey my doctor says that it is completely normal to forget things when you are pregnant. It's called pregnancy brain" I defended.
"Well you are still lucky to have me. So come on this appointment is the big one" Melissa laughed as she tugged on my arm.
Mel was right; today is a big appointment. This is the appointment that I had been looking forward to since I began my second trimester. Today is my eighteen week appointment, and it is a big one because today I will learn the sex of my baby. I had been trying to play it off that I wasn’t all that excited to Mel and Aiden, but the truth was that I was the most excited that I had ever been in my entire life. Both my friends have been swearing up and down that the baby is going to be a boy, and part of me wanted my first child to be a boy. That part of me wanted to have a little boy so he could play little league baseball and I would teach him the right way to treat a girl. Also I tend to like more boy names than girl names. In the past two weeks Mel and I had tested all the wives tales that we could find on the internet. Majority of or results were for a boy; except that my cravings have always been for sweets. My favorite thing in the entire world to eat is chocolate covered strawberries or any fruit in general. I felt that I had been eating healthier since my pregnancy. My baby bump was getting more and more difficult to hide, because it no longer looked like I had a big lunch. When I would wear some of my “baggier” shirts my stomach area would be tighter. One great thing was that I was pregnant in the winter; had it been the summer people would have known I was pregnant by now. I was constantly wearing oversized sweaters and sweatshirts to conceal the little bump.
I was relieved that no one had noticed or mentioned anything about my growing stomach in the dorms. Taking a shower had turned into something that I would either do extremely early or late at night. I have never been so nervous to take a shower in my life, but my fear was if someone noticed and put two and two together they’d know who the father was. While Louis and I had been talking every other day, I wasn’t quite ready to tell him about the baby. It was actually harder to keep it a secret from Niall; he and I had just started talking, but I wanted to tell Niall so badly. For once since… well even before the summer, everything seemed normal. When Niall caught me up on Liam it didn’t hurt as much as I thought it would. Listening to Midnight Memories didn’t send me into a depression; instead I was incredibly proud of my friends. I do consider the boys my friends. Well for the most part because I knew Zayn and Liam wouldn’t consider me a friend, but I still cared for both of them. Niall told me that Liam has become really distant since everything that happened, which I could completely relate with. Liam needs to find something to distract him from the pain until it’s gone. I knew that sooner than later I was going to tell either Niall or Louis about the pregnancy, but I am going to promise them to not tell Liam. Liam needs to hear about this from me and no one else.
I quickly got ready for the doctor’s appointment while Melissa charged the video camera. I am so lucky to have her in my life; I am happy that I do not have to go through this pregnancy all alone. I was wearing my maternity jeans, a grey NC State sweatshirt, and my black converse. I did my makeup since I knew Melissa was going to film my reaction, and I didn’t want to look like a pale ghost. We got to the hospital with more than twenty minutes to spare. Even though we were extremely early, they put me in a room pretty quickly.
“Are you nervous” Melissa asked, as we sat down in the brightly light room.
“I wouldn’t call it nervous. I would say I am anxious” I admitted, looking around the room at all the pictures of babies.
“I am nervous for some reason” Melissa admitted.
"Don't be Mel. I love sonograms. We get to hear the baby’s heart and see the little baby. It's actually really nice" I smiled.
"I'm going to hear it's heart beat" Mel cheered.
"We sure are" Dr. McKinnon said, as she entered the room.
"Hello Dr. McKinnon this is my best friend Melissa. Mel this is Dr. McKinnon" I said introducing them.
"Hello" Mel said, shaking her hand.
"Hello Melissa. Rian has told me a lot about you" Dr. McKinnon smiled.
There was something about going to the doctors for a sonogram that made up for all the other terrible experiences that I had at hospitals before. It might be that I really love my doctor, or that I am really excited to see how my baby is doing. I remembered being devastated when I found out I was pregnant, but now I view it as one of the best things that has happened to me. I so badly wanted a family and now I am getting one addition to the Rodriguez clan, as my dad used to call us. Dr. McKinnon went over all the basic checkup procedures prior to the ultrasound, and both Melissa and I teared up when we heard the little heartbeat.
"You know, I always knew you were pregnant but this just makes it seem so real" Mel said, squeezing my hand.
"Tell me about it" I smiled, listening to my baby's steady heartbeat.
"The baby has a steady heartbeat. Tell me Rian have you felt the baby kick yet" Dr. McKinnon asked.
"I sure have. I think I have a little soccer player in there. I have even had Melissa feel the little kicks" I answered.
"Yeah they are really neat to feel" Mel added.
"Have you considered taking breathing classes yet" Dr. McKinnon asked.
"I have thought about it. I just don't know where they are" I admitted.
"We have classes here. I recommend you bring someone with you. Someone who is going to be in the delivery room with you" Dr. McKinnon advised.
I hadn't really considered who I would have in the delivery room with me. I know I don't want to be alone, but would it be weird for Mel to be there? I consider her family. I don't even mind Aiden being in the room he just has to stay above the belt. I know I am going to have give birth, but it wasn't something that I was necessarily planning out now. I have quite some time before the baby shows up. I looked at Mel who was anticipating my reply.
"Mel would you go to the classes with me" I asked, smiling at her.
"Of course. When the next class" Mel asked Dr. McKinnon.
"I can put you girl's name down for this Saturday. Well as long as it works with you two" Dr. McKinnon smiled.
"Sounds good to me" I said
"Good. We'll be there" Mel cheered.
Once we switched over to the ultrasound, I was overwhelmed by all my emotions. Mel was video tapping every moment. This ultrasound was different than the others that I have had before. The baby was looking more like a baby. I could see the profile of its little face. The baby's nose was so small and cute; I feel even more in love with the baby. This baby is mine. While my feelings for Liam may not be the best right now, I am grateful for him giving me this blessing.
Later that evening Melissa, Aiden, and I were all scheduled to work in the bookstore. It felt just like old times. Melissa was stalking the shelves, Aiden was counting our inventory, and I was sitting at the registers counting the money from the drawers. It would have been a peaceful shift, but Aiden was keen on finding out the gender of the baby. He was practically begging Melissa to tell him, but she wasn't budging. Aiden was getting so frustrated that it was hilarious. I could hear the frustrated Aiden coming closer to me. A small smile came on my face as my phone vibrated. I had gotten a text from Hunter.
From Hunter: I wish I could come and visit you, but they need me to stay longer. I'm sorry Ri.
To Hunter: Aw, don't worry about it. We will see each other in class on Monday for sure.
I looked up from counting the drawers and saw Aiden staring at me. He was concentrating so hard. It was almost like he was trying to read my mind. I laughed at him and threw a pen at his chest to break his concentration.
"Why won't you tell me, Rian" Aiden asked.
"Why do you want to know, Aiden" I countered.
Aiden rolled his eyes at my question and sighed, "Well I am kind of emotionally invested in all this."
"And I am helping you get unemotionally invested" I laughed.
"Wow. You are so rude" Aiden groaned.
"Aiden, do you realize how amusing it is to watch you beg" I admitted.
"I am not begging" Aiden gasped.
"Yeah, you kind of are" I teased.
"Ugh! I just want to know" Aiden groaned again. I looked at Aiden and prepared myself to tell him. I took a deep breathe; for some reason it feel just as difficult to say as it was to tell him that I was pregnant.
"I am pregnant with a beautiful baby girl" I cheered.
Aiden eye's watered slightly as he embraced me, "You are having a baby girl. Congratulations Rian."
I was just about to thank Aiden, but I was interrupted by a familiar voice.
"You're pregnant" they asked, I could hear the hurt in their voice.
I looked behind Aiden, and his blue eyes met mine. Those blue eyes that were watering slightly. I could see that betrayal that was so prominent in his eyes. I hurt the one person I didn't want to ever hurt. I was fully aware that I would eventually have to tell Hunter about the baby, but I didn't think it would be this soon. I didn't want Hunter to find out like this. It broke my heart to see the disappointment on his face.
"Rian are you pregnant" Hunter asked again. I could hear how his tears were straining his vocal chords.
I couldn't answer Hunter verbally, instead I answered with a slight head nod. I felt the tears creeping up on me. This isn't how I imagined how Hunter would find out. Hunter was looking down at the ground; his shoulders slumped. He looked defeated.
"I am just going to leave" Hunter whispered before running out of the bookstore.
I tried to catch Hunter, but I was frozen. That familiar numbness was coming back to me. Before I could say anything Hunter was running out of the store. The tear finally began to stream down my face. I hurt the one person who brought me happiness. I hurt Hunter, and I never intended too. Aiden pulled me into his arms again, as I began to cry even harder.
"Go to him" Aiden whispered in my ear.
"But I am working. I can't" I cried.
"I am telling you to go. Rian he makes you happy and at the end of the day I want to see you happy. No one deserves more happiness than you" Aiden smiled.
"Are you sure" I asked, wiping away my tears.
"Yes. Now go to him" Aiden urged.