|| Hazel ||
"I"m going to have to pick you up today, Malia," I said.
"Where's mommy and daddy?" My 5 year old sister asked.
"They're at...work," I replied.
"They're always at work," Malia said sadly.
Dad was with his mistress. He's been cheating on my mom for over six months now. Mom knows, but neither of them have called for a divorce, yet. They both have a lot to lose. They care more about the money than they do for their children.
Jackson, my brother left when he first got the chance. He was currently in New York. Jackson only comes on occasions, but when he does it's usually only to get drugs. He's in debt with the gangs around here, that I do know.
"Chin up, you still got me," I said. She smiled slightly. I fixed the pink bow in her brown hair. "Are you finished eating?"
"Yep," Malia said as she slid off the stool. Her sneakers lit up when her feet touched the ground. She was convinced that her light up shoes make her cool.
I grabbed our bowls off the granite top and placed them in the dishwasher. I grabbed my bag on the chair nearby and waited by the door as Malia came bounding down the stairs. She fiddled with the straps of her pink princess backpack. I opened the door and we stepped out before I locked it behind me.
"Hello Hazel!" I turned and saw our neighbors, the Reeds. Mrs. Reed had a daughter that went to school with Malia, they were best friends so we became close with their family
"Hi Mrs. Reed," I smiled. "How are you?"
"I'm well and you?"
"I'm good, thank you for asking," I replied.
"Want me to take Malia?" She asked.
"I don't want to bother," I said.
"You'll be late to school if you have to go to the elementary and then back to the high school, please darling, it's only a small deed," Mrs. Reed smiled.
I nodded, "Thank you." I turned to Malia, "Are you okay with that?"
"Absolutely!" Malia exclaimed as she ran towards Mrs. Reed's van.
I got in my car and started the engine before driving onto the morning busy streets. The traffic wasn't as bad in the morning as it is in the afternoon, but still, I hoped to make it on time. If I get another tardy, I'll have to go to detention and that won't look good on my school record if I want to get into Harvard, Princeton, UC Davis, or Cal Poly.
I planned on getting into a good college because that's what my parents want me to do. I fear that they will drive me to desperate measures just like my brother. Sure he got into a good college, but he got his high school diploma with who knows know many type of drugs in his system. He said the drugs helped him handle our parent's constant demands.
The entire student body considered me as the perfect student, the perfect daughter, the perfect sister, the perfect friend, the perfect girlfriend, the perfect everything. In reality I was far from all those. Everyone always says how cool my parents are and how lucky I am to have them, but they're only 'cool' because they're never here for me to care about me.
Nobody know's what goes on behind closed doors. No one knows how broken my home really is. I hide it all with a smile, with a simple 'thank you' and they never suspect anything. I reached for my bag as my phone rang in the cup holder. It was my dad.
"Hello," I said.
"Where are you?" He asked.
"i'm at school, why?"
"I need you to pick up Malia today, I won't be able to," He said.
"I know dad, I noticed when I didn't see mom nor you today," I replied a bit annoyed.
"Don't give me attitude young lady," He said sternly.
"Is that it?" I asked. "Is that all you called me for?"
"Adam!" I heard a women call from the background.
"I have to go Hazel," He said. "See you soon."
"Just divorce mom already!" I said through gritted teeth before tapping the screen to end the call. I took a deep breath and closed my car door behind me.
I turned at the sound of the familiar voice. A sandy blonde haired boy came walking towards me. His hands stuffed in his jacket. I smiled at the sight of him before his body collided with mine in a tight hug. His warm hands traveled down my waist. He brought his lips to mine before I felt him lift my shirt up and slowly make his way up to my boobs.
"Hey," I pulled away. He bit his lip. "Not today, Alex."
"Oh, c'mon babe, a quickie won't hurt," He said.
"I can't be tardy anymore," I replied as I pushed past him and began walking towards the school. He caught up to me and took my hand before lightly kissing it. I smiled slyly.
Alex walked me to class and whispered he loved me before diving back into the sea of people. I pushed the door open and stepped into my first class. I walked to the back of the room and slid into my seat. A blond haired girl soon walked in. She saw me and smiled before quickly tip toeing towards me.
"Hey Aurora," I said to my best friend.
"Guess what?" She said,
"Does it have to do with Paul?" I asked.
"Yes! We kinda went all the way yesterday," She giggled.
"No, really?" I said shocked. "Oh Aurora, you just can't stay away from the bad life."
"You know I like the dangerous run. Bad boys are an ultimate weakness," She sighed. "Paul treats me good, he's sweet and he really cares about me."
Her eyes brightened as she explained her boyfriend of almost a year. Rumor had it, he ran with a gang. He was two years older than Aurora and he had her; head over heels for him. A few guys at our school tried to win her heart but she was already in too deep with Paul.
"I thought he was in Dallas," I said.
"He was, but then him and the rest of his gang relocated and now they're back in California. He called me to meet up, one thing led to another and here I am, as happy as I can be," She smiled.
The bell rang and the Mr. Willis stood up, "Good morning class. Today you have a test."
Everyone groaned. He began passing the packets around along with the scantrons, "It's worth on hundred points and will make up 35% of your grade. You will have until the end of the class period, which is fifty minutes long. I suggest you begin."
I grabbed my pencil and began working on the test.
My phone vibrated on the lunch table. I picked it up when I saw it was Mrs. Reed.
"Hello," I said.
"Hi darling, sorry to disrupt you," She apologized.
"No, you're fine. What's up?" I asked.
"I was just wondering if it would be okay for Malia to come over after school ended for a playdate with a Sophia and a few of the neighborhood kids. I was planning on telling you in the morning but I completely forgot."
"How long is it going to be?"
"Until around four or four thirty, maybe," Mrs. Reed replied.
"Yea, that's fine," I smiled.
"I could pick her up as well, darling don't worry about it."
"Thank you," I replied.
"You're welcome. See you later," She said. I hung up.
"Are you still up for helping me decorate tomorrow?" Aurora asked.
I looked up at her, "Yea. What time?"
"Around five or six," She replied.
"I could totally go," I said.
She smiled, "Great." She pulled out a mirror and examined her lipstick.
"Will Paul be going?" I asked.
"No, he says he's busy," She replied.
"What can possibly be more important than his girlfriend?" I asked.
She shrugged, "Something with the gang."
"Just make sure you don't get caught in that horrible lifestyle," I said.
"I know Hazel, it's not like I'm going to start selling drugs or anything like that," She rolled her eyes and laughed.
The final bell rang and I breathed in the fresh air. The parking lot was buzzing, I walked towards my car. The sun was shining brightly and it must've been approximately eighty degrees. I turned my head and my eyes fell upon something every girl in love fears.
My breath hitched in my throat as I saw Alex making out with another girl. His lips were on someone else's. His hands caressed another girl's skin. Anger fueled inside me.
"Hazel, what are you staring at?" The girl next to me gasped when she saw what I was looking at. "Alex!"
He turned and his eyes widened when he saw me. The red headed girl he was kissing looked at me and scurried away.
"Babe, it's not what it looks like," He said.
I laughed coldly as tears threatened to fall, "You're a fucking asshole, Alex."
"Sweetheart," He took a step forward and reached out but I backed away and slapped his hand away.
"Don't touch me!" I shouted. I knew a crowd had now surrounded me. All eyes were on Alex and I. "You know what Alex? You can fuck off! One girl just wasn't enough, right? You just couldn't keep your dick in your pants," I slowly started backing away. "I'll see you in hell, Alex," I said before flipping him off.
A couple of girls cheered me on as I got in my car and started the engine before angrily stepping on the gas and racing out of the parking lot. Hot angry tears spilled out of my eyes. I was furious. At Alex, at the girl, at the world, at everyone.
The drive home was dark. I arrived home, I cried and cried and swore and screamed and punched the steering wheel. I can't believe I ever loved Alex. He made me feel like an absolute princess. Like I was the only girl he loved...clearly I wasn't. I grabbed my backpack and got out of my car before slamming the door.
I went towards the front door and unlocked it before stepping inside. I pressed my back against the closed door and slid down. "Hazel!" I immediately stood up when I saw my mother walking in. Her blonde curly hair bounced with life. She adjusted her blouse. "Where's Malia?" She asked.
"With Mrs. Reed, she's at a playdate with Sophia," My voice cracks.
"What's wrong?" Mom asks.
"Alex cheated on me," I say as I break down.
"That bastard," She says before she runs to me and hugs me. She's never been this nice to me in a while. It was helpful for her neutering side to come out and comfort me in this time. "I'll make your favorite food and we can watch a movie and spend the rest of the night together, sound okay?"
She smiled, "Okay, I'll call you down when the food is ready." I nod once again before going upstairs and into my room. I immediately throw myself on my bed and cry. I feel so pathetic for crying over a guy who didn't feel like he had enough with me, but I've been with Alex for over two years.
I sit up and bring my knees to my chest before burring my head in my hands. Who knows how long he's been cheating on me. Two years went to the trash. My phone rang next to me. I looked at the screen, it was Alex. I hit the red button. Another person called, this time it was Aurora. I answered.
"Is what I heard true?" She asks.
"Yes," I reply miserably.
"I'm gonna beat his ass!" She exclaims. "That asshole! Honestly he is no longer worth your time and he's a dick," She continues.
I small smile pulls at the corner of my lips, "Everyone saw."
"It's what everyone is talking about," Aurora added. "It will probably be the main topic at Jennifer's party."
I exhaled, "How did everything go wrong? When did he ever get sick of me? Was the sex not enough? Was I not enough? Everything seemed perfect this morning now, everything is in flames."
"Don't be so hard on yourself Hazel. This isn't your fault. Guys just never feel like they have enough," Aurora comforts.
"I'm going to go now, I have things to do," I said.
"Are you sure? Do you want me to come over?" She asks.
"No it's fine. My mom is home early, we're going to spend the night together and catch up."
"That's good your mom is there for you," She said.
"Yea, but she's suddenly so nice? Doesn't that sound strange?" I ask.
"Maybe she just wants to finally be there for you," Aurora replies.
"I dunno. I'll talk to you tomorrow," I say.
"Okay. I'll pick you up tomorrow at 3 for the decorating, sound okay?"
"Yea, sounds good," I reply.
"Bye!" She exclaims, bubbly yet again.
I hung up and sat back on the bed post. Thoughts of Alex ran through my mind. Our long 3 am conversations about our future. How we planned to run away from California and move to Sin City. He always said I'd be a sexy showgirl. Or how he said he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me. Marry and have children.
All that seemed like a lie now that I look back. Nothing but a white lie that turned dark. I shake my head and go to my closet where I held a huge teddy bear that Alex gave me on valentines day. I threw out all the things he gave me. An old varsity jacket, his football jersey, plenty of stuffed animals, jewelry, everything. I set it in a pile on the carpet.
"Hazel! Dinner," Mom called.
I calmed myself and left my room before making my way downstairs. Mom sat on a dinning room chair. She smiled and motioned the table she set up. Malia now sat next to an empty chair. She smiled at me, "Hi Hazey."
I sat in the chair next to her, "Hi Malia, how was the playdate with Sophia?"
"It was fun!" She exclaimed. "We got to play with her new Barbie dolls and her Barbie dream house!"
"How fun" I try to sound enthusiastic.
"We'll get you a Barbie house just like that soon enough sweetheart," Mom said.
"Really mommy?" Malia asked. Her eyes shinned bright.
"Of course darling! Anything for you."
Mom always tried to keep Malia and I happy. Especially Malia, she's had to grown up in such a toxic relationship between mom and dad. We hide the fact that dad is cheating on mom with another woman. We keep all the family affairs and problems away from her.
Mom handed me my plate. I thanked her and picked up the fork. Malia swung her feet as she was given her plate as well. She occasionally snuck a few pieces of pork for King, our family pitbull. I remember when we went to the adoption center to pick him out. Mom wanted a German Shepard and dad wanted a Rottweiler. They let Malia choose, she immediately fell in love with King. Mom had looked horrified when she set her eyes on the grey furred dog.
"How about another dog, sweetheart? Look at this Pomeranian!" She had tried to steer Malia away from King's cage but they were inseparable. When dad picked her away from the cage, Malia threw the biggest tantrum. She screamed and kicked and cried until they agreed to let her adopt King. At the time, King was called Bullet. Malia decided to call him King and they have loved each other since.
Here you have a big, 'scary' dog that is categorized as a killer, yet King was very kind to Malia. He never bit her and he even slept in Malia's room. I loved King as well, he was a cutie. I'm glad Malia chose King. She always finds comfort in that dog.
"When is Alex coming over again?" Malia giggled.
I snapped back to reality. "He's not coming anymore."
"Why?" She asked as she chewed on a piece of pork.
"We broke up.." I trailed off.
"King never liked him," Malia giggled again.
I smiled. She was right. King always tried to attack Alex every time he came over. Which is why he hardly came to my house.
After dinner Mom and I had a long chat. We watched a movie on the couch. Malia chose Sleeping Beauty. I just sat back and watched as the usual cliche story plots played over and over. A king and a queen had a daughter who, oh so sadly gets cursed by the wicked witch and must take her to a secluded cottage in the woods. The fairy godmothers take care of her. What happens next? What happens in every Disney movie. She finds a guy and there's love at first sight! (As if there were such thing)
True love's kiss. True love's kiss. True love's kiss. True love's kiss. True love's kiss. Everything revolves around love! What if I don't want to be waken by true love's kiss? It's the same thing over and over. Lack of originality. But hey, if it gets the audiences attention, it's a hit.
Everything is cliche.
After the movie we all went to our rooms. Mom tucked Malia in. She wished me a good night and went into her room. I sat on my bed and looked at the pile of gifts from Alex. Those memories that now haunted me. Mom was a heavy sleeper and rarely woke up to loud noises. I managed to sneak in a knife from the kitchen. I played some music as I held the knife in one hand.
My grip tightened around the handle as I impaled the blade in the teddy bear's stomach. I sliced and stabbed and threw out all the stuffing. Releasing my anger out and beheading the teddy bear. I broke the chains on the necklace, tore the sweater in half. I attacked every stuffed animal like a hungry wolf. Like a wolf killing for sport.
I tore my fingers into the rips and used all my strength to widen the cut. My anger began to fade as I was panting heavily and stood in a mess of white stuffing. I mindlessly let the knife fall onto the disaster I made. I simply turned off the lights and climbed into bed as my anger was replaced with sadness.
I cried until I fell asleep