Playing with glass

Dear diary, this is me

(Possible trigger warning)


22. cant lie

Saturday 21st November 2015, 9:43pm:

I'm done pretending and lying to myself

I miss Adam, so god damn much. I wish he would talk to me, i wish that he would miss me too, i wish he still loved me, i need him back, i need him in my life. Without him i'm lost and lonely, i miss how he'd call me after school and text me all the time, i'd do anything to re-live my days with him. If i could go back in time and change what i did i would, i wish i could go back to the start of this year and fix all my mess ups, i'd do anything to still have him, be able to kiss him  and sit in his arms. I love him so much, but hes gone forever. 

I'm so lonely i could cry. Its always going to be this way isn't it, i'm invisible and its killing me. I'm breaking down crushing and crumbling. I cant hear that name without hurting.


Happiness is a disappointment its stupid and a waste, happiness is temporary 

sadness, this sadness is permanent 

sadness is forever

hope is gone

its over now

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