When You Break Up/Make Up
Calum: It had been a solid year since you and Calum had broken up. What was he expecting after cheating on you? It didn't matter that he had been drunk. He cheated. At that moment in time you were not on his mind and it showed you that he obviously didn't care as much as he said he did.
You still kept in touch with the guys because they were your friends too. Each of them you were close with for different reasons, but Michael knew everything about you. Since you two were little it had always been that way. You'd been as thick as thieves. So when you and Calum split it hit him the hardest because he was how you two had met. For you two not to be together was such a strange concept. Especially considering him and Calum had an equally if not greater bond than yours.
Since your split you've noticed a change in Calum and wondered if it was because of your relationship. Besides concerts and promo for their band, he never stepped outside. If they were at a new city he wouldn't walk around meeting fans. He wouldn't sight see or visit historical places. Unless it involved staying in his room or getting booze, you never saw him.
"I got him outside today." Michael states as he lays in bed for the night.
"I'm glad. He worries me by not being social anymore." You admit, realizing you still care for him.
"We all walked down to a bar a couple blocks over. It gave us the perfect opportunity to meet fans." He says, exhaling loudly.
"Please tell me he took pictures." You beg, fearing the worst.
"A few. But after a while he just walked off." He explains as he clears his throat.
"Why is he acting this way Michael? It's been a year." You ask, confused.
"He loved you, Y/N. You gave up before he could make up for his wrong doing. He's never stopped blaming himself for screwing things up." He admits. You swallow the lump of guilt in your throat and exhale loudly.
"How was the show tonight?" You ask in hopes of changing the subject.
"Great as always. The energy tonight was wild!" He practically shouts in your ear.
"That's wonderful." You say with a wide smile.
"Yeah, it would've been even better if Cal had been more into it." He announces. You groan in response and shake your head in disappointment.
"It won't end with him will it?" You ask, feeling guiltier by the second.
"Until you two are back together or until you at least give him a chance to talk? No. He'll never stop beating himself up." He explains in a gruff tone. Great. Now you had Michael against you as well.
"What about the new album? Didn't you guys plan on visiting the studio today to write?" You ask, changing the subject again.
"Ash and Luke wrote two. Then Luke and I went in a short while later." He replies.
"Calum?" You ask, hopeful.
"Not a word." He admits after a short silence. Why does this always end up going back to him?
"Please tell me that it doesn't have to do with us?" You ask, growing irritated. There's a long silence on his end and you sigh in response.
"Of course." You say, exasperated.
"We aren't even dating anymore and he has me feeling guilty about dumping him for cheating." You continue. Michael laughs on the other end. The sound brings a smile to your face and it immediately calms you.
"How're things with you?" He asks.
"The usual. With school over now I've been working more. Gotta save up enough if I'm gonna see you guys' show this summer." You admit with a wide smile.
"That'll be great! You know we could've just slid you a ticket free of charge." He says with a laugh.
"I'm aware, but I wanna help in any way I can. Besides I'll feel guilty watching you guys kill it and know that I didn't actually pay for my ticket." You admit.
"Alright, alright. But we've got the backstage stuff covered. Got it? No objections!" He shouts, laughing afterward.
"Okay, deal." You answer with a smile.
"Any boyfriends I should know about?" He asks, holding in laughter.
"Oh, really funny, Mikey." You condescendingly say. He bursts out in laughter and because it's so addictive you can't help but laugh as well.
"It's good to hear you laugh." He says after a while. You finally calm enough to say,
"Thanks. It feels good too." Jokingly. He chuckles in response before you say your good nights and hang up, so you can sleep for work the next morning.
What you didn't know was that the entire time Calum had been listening. Your entire phone call with Michael he heard and he smiled for the first time in a long time. He had felt better knowing you were so happy and that you were still yourself. All that time away he thought he had forgotten your laugh. But once he heard it again, he knew he never had. But his memory could never hold it as perfectly as you made it. He didn't know it was because everything was imperfect to him since you.
That was when it hit him that he needed to write. He could hear it in his head as soon as you two had hung up. The piano at the very beginning, the way he felt all the time since you two had split. His feelings of loss and loneliness intensified the minute your voice was gone. Grabbing the closest thing he could he began writing out everything he heard, as accurately as he heard it.
The next day when Michael and him entered the studio he had already written half of it. As Michael read what he already wrote he continued writing more. He didn't even realize as he hit the chorus that he had begun crying. It wasn't until Michael patted him on the back and opened his arms that he really broke. There, is when he realized he still needed you and it killed him to know that you seemed to be over what you had. Twenty minutes later he had calmed enough to hear what Michael had said.
"You're going to have to rewrite this. It's too smeared to read buddy." He admits, showing him the chorus with Cal's tears all along the page lines. As he wrote he felt stronger then he had in months and with Michael's poetic verses they had written not one, but two songs within that short time. One sounding like their normal style and the other a softer ballad. Calum felt they were the best he had ever written, it only fit that they should be about you.
When the time came to record them, he was nervous. These would be the two songs he had full control of excluding a verse and the chorus, which they all sang. They had to be perfect in order for you to hear how much he still loved you. He was certain that if he couldn't deliver the right notes you'd only continue to block him out. So when the music played and those acoustic guitar chords began, he couldn't understand why he choked. He knew the words, they had meant everything to him so he memorized them like the curves of your face. Yet he couldn't get them out onto the track.
He walked away feeling the disappointment kicking in. Then he remembered something that instantly brought a smile to his face. As he scrolled through his voice mails he hit the one you saved the first month after they left for this last tour.
"Hey Cal! You must be sleeping. I hope your sleeping. You are getting enough sleep right?" There was your laugh again.
"I just wanted to say how much I miss you! It feels like forever since you left and I love you. Never stop surprising me and always give your everything sweetheart. Remember how proud I always am of you. Always yours, Y/N." Then you were gone. You were right. He had to give it his all and never stop surprising you. So that is exactly what he did when he stepped inside that room.
Months later you're standing front row as the guys perform in front of you. They're wired tonight and their energy fills the arena. You can't help but look over at Cal for most of the songs and see that he just isn't himself. Again you felt the guilt eating you alive. Maybe you should talk to him after all, I mean if he thinks it'll help get him out of this, why not? He catches you staring and after the song ends he interrupts the boys banter to say something.
"I just wanted to say that the guys and myself have been pretty busy in the studio lately. We just recorded some songs I'm really proud of and I think I speak for the guys when I ask: Would you like to hear one?" He says, just before the crowd screams in a deafening roar. You notice the confusion among the other three guys but they nod in agreement.
"Michael, if you'd please." Cal says, watching Michael give up his guitar to sit at the keyboard. Again the crowd roars in response, completely blown away by this last minute change. They haven't done this anywhere else they've gone, you can't help but wonder why they chose to do it the night you see them.
The piano starts soft and slow and Luke opens with the first verse. You wonder if Michael wrote this one as the lyrics are more darker than you're used to. Abandonment, loneliness are all making an appearance and with the strung out lower bass notes you can't help but feel moved. Then the chorus comes in and all the guys are singing, Cal included and that's all it takes for you to break.
'I lived in a world of color but now
I've become the man who sees gray
I know now what it means to feel alone
So when I beg for your return
Hear me when I say, you were the one
Let me hold you once more like I used to
Cause our time isn't over and I'm still here waiting'
His words hit like a bullet to the chest and your eyes well up with tears. He cared. You no longer cared that he cheated and all you wanted was his arms around you. As the last verse fades out Calum's voice breaks and you can see the tear fall on his cheek. You needed to be near him so you both could be together again.
After the song is over they take a small break and you make your way toward one of the security guards. You're about to show him your pass when he recognizes your name, the guys wanted you backstage. So off you went in search of them in hopes to calm Calum down. Behind the door you could still hear him crying softly and hoped he'd take you back. You'd understand if he didn't after everything it seems you've put him through.
The door opens and the guys leave with sympathetic smiles, leaving you with him. Calum takes one look at you and you both run to the other. His arms wrap around you holding you tight as yours tighten around his neck. As you give him words of comfort and try to calm him down he backs away, raises his hands and holds your face before kissing you. It was then you knew that you were still in love with him.
"I'm so sorry, Y/N. Please forgive me." He begs, with red puffy eyes and a lone tear in the corner of his eye.
"You had me at 'you were the one'. Of course I forgive you." You admit, kissing him once more. His arms wrap around you tightly again and you share a hug before he asks,
"Will you marry me?" Stepping away to kneel down. He presents you with a black box and inside is a diamond ring cut beautifully. It shines brightly making the heart it's shaped in look as though it were moving.
"Of course I will!" You exclaim, before he slides it onto your finger. Together you kiss once more and after wiping away his tears you both return to the show.
His mood changed drastically after their return. He began dancing around and singing with a wide smile through every song. He'd always make sure to look over to you still dancing around in the front row. No one even knew that under your giant foam finger, was the ring he just placed on your hand. You knew that no matter what the distance, time or obstacles, you'd always be together.