It starts so small,small
A minuscule seed sewn screaming into the nooks and crannies of the mind
It is bullying, driving
these thoughts so dire and these dreams so bleak,
Sitting at the back of a classroom
though silent it still whispers,
crawling into your lungs,
poisoning them with violent shakes
and my hands can barely stop
I can't stop
a quaking mess of confusion and heavy heartbeats.
I'm plunging, falling, drowning,
call it what you will
My head is on fire
and my heart is close to combustion
I am on fire but I am submerged
sinking to the bottom of a black and blue abyss,
drowning in a sea of thoughts strung together in panic
going one thousand miles per hour
and I just can't stop.
and everyone is looking,
except they're not
their heads are down
not one lousy glance cast my way
because not one of them could suspect
that I had been lost at sea.
Important note- This is 100% my own experience with panic attacks and I understand not everyone has the same feelings and triggers these are simply how I see mine.