Amnesia [Lashton] (BoyxBoy)

I was gonna get him to smile for me one way or the other, there was just something about him.

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4. FOUR

*Edited
*I take no credit for the lyrics in this chapter.
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[Luke's POV:]

I woke up at around 12:30, with an arm around me. I jumped out of the bed and realized it was only Michael. We had fallen asleep working on our song that was most likely crushed while we slept. "Mikey," I whispered my new nickname and poked him softly, he was really cute when he was sleeping, just like Calum. He groaned but opened his eyes.

"Mornin' Lukey," he said in tired voice. "What time is it?"

"12:35 sleepy head," he gave me a small smile and jumped up and that's when I realized he wasn't wearing anything. I mean anything. "Mikey! Eww!"

"Wha?" He then realized what I said eww about a pulled his boxers on.

"You slept with me naked?!"

"I guess I did.. Sorry sleeping habits."

"But I was shirtless and pant less!"

"Then I guess you can say we slept naked together."

"Eww, just eww Mikey."

"Welp, I'm hungry."

"Me too," I paused wondering if I should tell him that I'm gay or not. "Mikey before we eat can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"What would you do if I told you I was gay after we had done slept practically naked together?" He was silent for a minute.

"I'd say it's cool because I'm gay too." My jaw dropped.

"Well this is way awkward now.."

"Why? It doesn't have to be Lukey.." He crawled over to where I was on the floor and leaned in, our breaths mixed and I got nervous, then Ashton popped in my head and I pulled away. "What's the matter? You don't wanna kiss me?"

"No. Yes. I don't know, a little."

"Then why didn't you?"

"Ashton."

"I'm confused. Are you two together?"

"No, he won't even look at me, and he's only talked once."

"Then why won't you kiss me?"

"I-it would be weird right?"

"No, unless you make it weird, and the only way we'd find out is if we did it."

"Fine, but just one."

"Aww. Why one?"

"Because I think I might like Ash."

"Fine." Michael leaned in until our breaths mixed and... Let's just say never again. Not that he's not my type or not cute, but because I like Ash.

(Time skip)

"Ashton please talk, I've done nothing but talk to you for three months now and you won't even look at me." He just sat there, then I had an idea. "Ash I'm gonna tell you something, I'm sure you've wondered why I've talked to you sense I moved here. Well it's because, well, I like you Ashton. I like your curls, and I've only seen your eyes once but I love them." He looked at me, looked at me!

"G-go a-way L-Luke." I frowned and tears came to my eyes.

"Okay A-Ashton. B-bye." I got up and ran out of the lunch room, not even bothering to throw away my food. A little piece of my heart broke.

[Ashton's POV:]

"I like you Ashton. I like your curls, and I've only seen your eyes once but I love them." Said Luke, I froze but looked at him.

"G-go a-way L-Luke."

"Okay A-Ashton. B-bye." I saw his eyes water and ran out of the cafeteria not even throwing away his tray. Did I hurt him? I didn't mean too. Yes you did you faggot. N-no I didn't, I like L-Luke too. No you hate him, he called you cute and you're ugly, you're a worthless piece of shit Ashton. I know, that's why I hurt myself, because I'm no good, and people don't like me. I listened to this voice in my head daily. That's why I told Luke to go, I like him too, but I can't be with him, he can't handle someone like me. Someone who cuts, gets beat, and is a piece of shit. I don't deserve Luke anyway.

[Luke's POV:]

I ran to the bathroom and I soon heard Mikey's voice. "Luke what's wrong? Let me in the stall Luke." I unlocked the stall and he entered and shut it back. "Lukey tell me what's wrong babe."

"A-Ashton."

"What happened?" He pulled me in for a hug.

"He t-told me t-to go a-away," I sobbed harder.

"Why?"

"I t-told him h-how I feel a-and that's what I got." Michael held me tigger and we fell to the floor.

"It's alright Lukey. Maybe he had a reason," he whispered.

Flash forward a couple days, I haven't sat with Ashton since Monday, so almost an entire week. I'm scared that if I sit with him, I might say something again and he'll tell me to leave. And I don't want to go through that again.

[Ashton's POV:]

I missed hearing Luke's voice at lunch. I wanted to tell him that it was okay for him to sit with me but I couldn't gain the courage. Monday night I went home, hung with my 'best friend' and then got my butt beat by my dad. And while all that was happening the voice kept chanting, beat the boy, kill 'em if you have too! He's a no good anyway.

I wanted to talk to Luke, but I just couldn't drag him into this, my life. I know it would hurt him to see me like this. That's also why I flipped out Monday, but like I said I do miss him.

I was sitting in the living room and my dad came and sat beside me, I immediately tensed up.

"Look at me boy," I did I was told. "My boss wants me to bring you and your girlfriend to work tomorrow."

"B-but I don't h-have a girlfriend." And I didn't want one, eww.

"WELL THEN GET ONE!"

"But I d-don't want o-one dad." That was a mistake, he punched me right on the face slung me in the floor. I ran up to my room and told my 'best friend' all about it.

Deeper faggot! Deeper! Luke doesn't like you and neither does your own dad and they never will!

This is exactly why Luke can't like me, he doesn't need me, I'm a disgrace. I'd only bring him pain.

I grabbed my journal and started writing.

Well today at school I was lonely, at home wasn't much better. Luke probably hates me now, just like my dad, speaking of dad, I got a nice good punch in today. But don't worry my 'best friend' helped me through it. Now for my daily song writing.

You've got me shaking from the way, you're talking. My heart is breaking but there's no use crying. What a cyanide surprise you have left for my eyes, if I had common sense I'd cut myself or curl up and die.

-Ashton

[A/N:] Wow, let me just say that Ashton's dad in this book is fucking dick! And what do you think about Ashton's journal writing, and also do you know the song? And if so comment what it was. Thanks for reading! ^,^

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