How Each Star Wars Film Could Have Ended

Funny alternate endings I made up for each Star Wars movie, in order. I'm not saying I wish it ended this way, but in some cases I can see why you might.


1. The Phantom Menace

The Battle of Naboo had begun. As the Gungans finished energizing the kilometer-long shield, AAT tanks and MTTs rolled in and began to fire. However, the shield absorbed the lasers. Realizing the lasers were useless here, OOM-9 told them to cease fire. From the Droid Control Ship, a Neimodian told OOM-9 to "activate the droids." The tanks deployed their droids, which unfolded and made for the shield.

The Gungans looked horrified. And then the droids stepped through the shield and cocked their blasters.

"Drop your weapons," the droid at center front ordered coldly.

"What are wesa do?" Jar Jar whispered to Captain Tarpals.

"Wesa doing what wesa always do," he replied. "Wesa surrender!"

All the Gungans put down their weapons in agreement. It did not take long to round up the Gungans.

Now that the job was done, the droid army returned to the Naboo Royal Palace. After splitting up, a squad of droids marched across the Generator Complex. Although Qui-Gon was dueling Darth Maul, he turned to see the droids walking up behind him.

This gave Darth Maul an opening, allowing him to strike Qui-Gon with his lightsaber and knock his corpse off the bridge.

The droids turned their fire on Darth Maul. Too shocked to put up a defense, Maul was gunned down. Obi-Wan made his way across the bridge Maul had kicked him to, only to hold off a group of droids. After cutting them down, he leaped to the top, where he saw no one there. Only the corpses of Qui-Gon and Darth Maul. "NOOO!" he screamed.

Meanwhile, Padmè and the Naboo troops made their way through the palace. Battle droids kept blocking their path. "We don't have time for this, captain!" she said, and blasted another droid.

When they finished with that group, they rushed ahead to find a shocking sight. An army of droids stood before them. Padmè's jaw hung open. Did the Gungan army fail?

And then the droids opened fire, annihilating the entire crew.

Back at the throne room, there was good news and bad news.

"What have you done, you blithering idiots?" Nute Gunray demanded in a rage.

"We killed them, boss! Just like you wanted!" said the droid commander.

"Not like I wanted! I wanted Padmè and the Sith Lord alive!" Nute paused. "Screw it. Get out, you idiots!"

"Whatever you say, boss," said the commander.

Meanwhile, Obi-Wan snuck aboard a droid tri-fighter and fled to Coruscant. On the way there, he wondered what Qui-Gon's dying wish had been.

Finally he arrived and spoke with Yoda.

"What should I do about the boy?" Obi-Wan asked.

"To Tatooine. To his family, send him back," Yoda replied. "A new master, we will find you. Much to learn of the living Force, you do. Admit that, even Qui-Gon did."

Obi-Wan sighed.

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