Bad Direction

"It's just a dream!" I tried to tell myself. "In the morning when I wake up, I will be back home. This is just a dream. This can't happen to me!"
Yet it was precisely what happened! And it happened just me! Maybe it was planned, or maybe it was just by chance? I had no idea why, but there I was, in a house with five known guys, as wasn't nice.

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6. A person to trust

I quickly realized how the rules were in this house. Liam held in all the wires and it was him all talked to. Louis went away once a week and bought food for all. Sometimes even Niall went away because he was hungry for sweets, eat at Nandos or something. Sometimes he brought something back for me, such as candy or residue from his food, just because I would feel a bit free. Harry kept mostly himself away and he was the one who wrote new songs, read books and he loved the library. I ended up somewhere at the edge. I had no purpose and I had no freedom. The only fresh air as I got was when a window was open and they didn't even not let me walk out on the grass when the sun was shining.  

 

"What do you want in your room?"
Liam asked the question entirely taken from nowhere. I looked away from the TV, and I was surprised.
"Do you mean furniture and maybe a lamp or two?"
He nodded and he sat down next to me. He held up a 
catalog from an department store and he turned up the pages with furniture.
"Tell me what you want and maybe we can buy it?"
I realized that I had the chance to get something. I was tired of my bed and it wasn't fun to be locked in at my room.
"I want lights and something to sit on."
Liam seemed to be in a good mood and he nodded, but then he said something that made me stiffen.
"You were with me once, you were with Louis and you've been with Harry. Even Niall talked about that you had been nice to him. That's four times. You get to choose four things."

He didn't understand that I reacted. I just stared at him. That meant that I had to do it with them just to get things for my room?
"Are you serious?"
He nodded, and he looked at me seriously.
"You get nothing for free."
I frowned.
"But you said that you will do everything for me to be happy?"
He agreed with me.
"But sometimes it's good that you also have rules to follow." he said, as if it were obvious. "You'll do things for us so that we too are happy."
I didn't like that he changed all the rules.
"But I'm here against my will?"
He laughed a little bit and then he stood up. He put the catalog in front of me and he looked at me for a few seconds.
"Nelly, put a cross in front of all as you want, with a pen, and I promise that you will get paid for being with us."
 

 

 

Although I didn't like the new rule, I realized that no one would understand me, even though I explained that I was against everything. I chose to obey Liam and I went through all of the furniture. I tried to choose only the most important, so I didn't have to stand up for them more than necessary. I needed a ceiling lamp. I wanted to have a reading light and I wanted a sofa or a small armchair. That was the main thing and that I already had the chance to get. The fourth thing I chose was curtains.  

 

The very next day they showed up with my four things. Okay, it wasn't much, but for me it was worth it all. It was nice that it become a bit more homely in my room. I even went down to the library and picked out books as I could have in my room. Everything for me to pass the time on my own. My thought was that I would lie low and not mix myself with them. I would try not to be alone with them in a room and I would really show that I wasn't that girl they wanted. It wasn't a good plan, but I was hoping it would work.

 

 

Right as it was had all a meeting about me, but I wasn't involved. They came into my room and hung a painting on the wall. It showed a list of demands. Liam stood with a smile and looked at me.
"We have now added up rules for you."
I sat up on the couch. Everyone seemed happy. I swallowed.
"What?"
Liam smiled and he pointed at the blackboard.
"Monday night with me Tuesday night with Louis and so on. One night with us and then you have three nights when you can be together with whoever you want."
I frowned. He wasn't done and he seemed pleased with what they had signed up.
"You get one thing at a time as you are with one of us and we go 
goes through that every Saturday and see what you have done for us. We are thinking about having a family day, but so far we have much other stuff to do."
I swallowed again.
"What do that family day mean?"
He looked pleased.
"All hang out and we might play cards or maybe see a movie together, everyone in the same room."

I just stared at them. Harry smiled a little bit, and he liked the idea.
"You know we're doing this for your sake?"
I frowned.
"And when I have my period?"
Liam laughed.
"Then we will solve it in another way. You don't need to worry."
  When I was all alone again I went up to the blackboard. There stood all the information I needed, according to them. I would be with them four days a week. I didn't need to wash the dishes or buy clothes or even think about the economy or about my stuff. I would simply just be there to meet their needs.
 

 

"Are not you happy?"
Niall appeared. I turned around and I looked at him.
"With your rules?"
Niall nodded.
"Well, are you satisfied?"
I frowned and I shook my head.
"No I'm not satisfied." I said. "I have no freedom and you wont even let me say no. It's not the same rules for me as for you guys."
Niall came up to me and he seemed less concerned.
"But it's for us to know when and where and how."
I wanted to once again scream.
"Please, do you really think seriously that I agree to this?"
He nodded.
"Why not?"

I realized that Niall didn't understand. I had thought he would understand me and that he would realize how crazy it all was, but he chose to go on Liam line.
"I don't want to do this!" I whispered cold. He just laughed a little bit and he pulled a hand through his hair.
"You'll get used and you will understand that this is just for only youre sake."
I disagreed with him.
"I think you just thinking about your needs."

Niall shook his head, and he stood with his whole body towards me. He looked straight at me.
"Please give us a chance." he whispered prayer. "We just want it to work this out for everyone and it was actually Harry's idea to make a list for you."
Okay? It wasn't just Liam who wanted to decide?
"But you could have asked me?"
Niall agreed.
"But now we did as we did." he murmured quietly, and then he looked up on the list. "And you're going with me to my room now."
He was good at changing the subject.
"I wont go to your room."
Niall looked quickly at me.
"Then you will be punished."
I gave up hope but I wasn't going to give up everything.
"Punish me, then!"

Niall gasped and quickly, he looked toward the door, to see if anyone else heard us.
"No, don't say that!" he looked at me again. "Please come with me and I promise we wont do anything but sleep. I promise I wont touch you, but don't say no just like that."
I frowned.
"What can happen?"
He swallowed and he was actually scared.
"Please, Nelly!"
I shook my head.
"I think actually, for once, I wont follow your rules."
I sat down on the bed and I was waiting for a response. I didn't want to give up everything just because they had rules. Niall didn't know what to say.
"Let's just say it doesn't work as you think." he whispered. "They have a room as you haven't seen and there is everything as they can use."
I snorted.
"Okay, and what can they use?"
Niall hesitated. He frowned and he didn't think we even should talked about that room.
"Have you read 50 Shades of Grey?"
I nodded a little bit.
"Well, yes?"
He swallowed.
"But double up
!"

 

I chose to obey Niall and after supper I went with him to his room. He was careful to close the door and he made the bed in order for two. Niall had a double bed. On the walls hung photos of his family and actually, I liked his room. It was clean and he had nothing unnecessary in there.

 

Near the foot of the bed stood a television and as soon as we had put ourselves under the covers searched Niall for a movie to watch. He smiled wide and I knew that he liked to have my company.
"Shall we see on terror or something like that?" he asked tentatively. "Or what do you like to look at?"
I didn't know right away what I felt to watch.
"You can choose!"
He nodded with satisfaction.
"Horror!"

Okay, I was tired. I must admit that I didn't even understand what the film was about. Niall seemed totally inside of all that he saw and finally I chose to sleep. I think I fell asleep with my back to him, but I woke up during the night and I was then lying with my head on his chest. Somehow I felt more confident with Niall. He wasn't there to destroy me, even if he wanted me to be there for them all. I woke up many times during that night, because I wasn't used to sleeping next to another person. Every time I woke up, we were in new or another position against the mattress, but still, his arms was around me and still I was safe.

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