the world through my eyes


1. Goodbye Delilah

Wednesday 16th September 2015


 I can't believe she's gone. My favourite little shetland in the world. I thought she was getting better, I'd stopped worrying about her, and then 8 days after I found her desperately ill I get home and I'm told she's been put down. Bit sudden don't you think? It was such a shock. I'd spent the 15 minute car ride home talking about all the stupid and unimportant things in my life and then just as I'm about to get out of the car mum stops me. She started with 'I've got some sad news'. my heart started racing and my mind immediately jumped to Sophie, I think because she's been ill recently and then yesterday i found her looking not to good. Not ill, just a bit snotty.  Mum carried on with something like 'it's delilah, the vet was up there this afternoon and she was very ill', but it was such a blur and I'm not quite sure. she didn't actually get round to telling me for about a minute but i sort of already new because her eyes were all misted up. She asked me if i had any questions and although i had a million, I really didn't want to talk about it. 

   It's all my fault and I'll never forgive myself. When i saw her this morning she seemed a bit a bit rocky but i didn't do anything about it. I should have at least texted jan (her carer) but I didn't want to keep annoying her. It was only a week ago that I was annoying john (jans husband). Its only a tummy ache, I'm sure, he kept saying and it turned into much much more. And because beans has been in her pen or had her muzzle on a lot recently they hadn't had much time to groom each other or spent quality time together either.

  I can't believe she's gone. She was the most beautiful little shetland ever and her presence made my time with beans even more enjoyable than I thought possible. Although she didn't really grow to love me, I really grew to love her. She could be so sweet when she wanted something and she always wanted more attention than I had time to give her because i was alway there to see beans. Now I wish I'd spent more time with her. She was a truly amazing pony. Not to mention cheeky. Her and beans' relationship reminded me so much of mine and mums. They didn't always get on but there was a strong bond of love between them. The strongest bond I've ever seen between two horses. They'd only been back together for three months and they were almost inseparable.

   I'm going to miss her so much and although I've only had the chance to know her for nine months I know I will remember her forever. Goodbye Delilah. You've left a handprint on my heart... 


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