Change Me [Justin Bieber]


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11. Chapter Eleven

Kristy and I sat in my room for long. She seemed more confused than ever before now. She wanted to be part of what was going on. She wanted to know every single detail about what had happened and she didn’t really know how to react whenever I told her, because to her this was still so unreal.

“So you’re a couple now?”

“It’s more complicate than that Kristy. He’s a superstar, and I’m a nothing remember?”

“You’re way more than that to him Amy, look at your neck.”

“But what if I’m just another girl Kristy? What if all of this is just a lie?”

“From everything you’ve just told? Why would he fly you to New York just to lie to you Amy?”

At the same time my phone started ringing and made me escape from the horrible question I didn’t want to answer.

“So did you get home safe?”

I hadn’t even gotten the chance to say hello when he spoke.

“Yeah I got here. Just spoke with some friends and family. You ok?”

“Yeah, just miss you already Amy.”

“It’s okay. That’s what you promised. Everything is gonna be okay.”

“It is.”

I could feel his smile through the phone and for all in the world I just wanted to hug him right now.

“Kristy says thanks for your present. It means a lot to her, and then she found your shirt.”

“Oh… What did she say?”

“I showed her…”

“I thought you wanted to keep it to yourself.”

“Everything is different now. I’ll figure something out.”

“Don’t tell the world.”

“Trust me I won’t, but we’ll take it from where it goes right?”

“Of course, I love you Amy Johnson.”

“Love you too, gotta go back to Kristy. We have a lot of things to talk about. See you soon.”

“Sooner than you think.”

I hung up at Kristy who could barely contain her excitement honestly I hated when she was like this, but I could imagine how she must have felt.

We had been sitting in my room for long and as it was Sunday night it meant that we had to get some rest soon even though I wasn’t ready to sleep.

When we were both lying in my bed later that night and I thought Kristy was asleep, she turned around to face me.

“Amy?”

“huh?”

“Are you scared?”

“Of what?”

“What’s going to happen tomorrow at school?”

“No, not anymore.”

“Are you sure?”

“Why would I be scared? I have the most amazing support I’ve ever had. No offence but I believe in him and he believes in me.”

“Everything’s gonna change now aren’t they?”

“They already did Kristy. I’m sorry.”

With that I fell asleep and didn’t wake up till shortly before we had to leave the next morning. Both Kristy and I hurried out of bed. We got ready within no time and went to school in my shitty car.

People were staring at us weirdly as we walked the halls everyone was whispering and I felt rather uncomfortable until I saw the school news come up on the screens in the hall.

“It looks like Kelvin Park High School got its own little celebrity. Amy Johnson also known as the singing sensation of YouTube has been missing from school ground for the past couple of weeks and we think we got an answer to it. Late last night Amy Johnson was seen at the airport here in Chicago, when seen she was wearing this hoodie as seen on the picture taken of Amy. Her plane came from New York, and who have we seen wearing a shirt like this in New York? That’s right no other than the famous superstar Justin Bieber. You heard it here first, Amy Johnson and Justin Bieber, maybe this is a new thing.”

“Nice done midget!”

I heard him all across the hall and I suddenly saw everyone staring at me. They were right but how? I didn’t know, but I knew one thing and I didn’t like the feeling I had inside of me at the moment. I took my bag over my shoulder and looked to Kristy.

“Did you tell anyone?”

I wasn’t speaking loud but I could sure tell that she heard what I said and by her look it didn’t seem like she had told anyone.

“Did you?”

“No Amy I swear I didn’t say anything.”

“Good, if you do you’ll never meet him, you hear me?”

I looked at her all serious before I ran out of the school to hide until class started.

When the bell rang I finally made it to class without dragging too much attention to myself and found a seat in the back of the class. Yet everyone was still whispering and talking about what happened. This was the time for me to cover my neck very well otherwise people would speak more. Tyler was in this class as well and it scared the shit out of me that he was sitting there talking about it.

About halfway through class my phone went off and everyone was staring at me as they heard my new ringtone, so I quickly picked up and went outside.

“Yeah?”

“Hey sunshine, you alright?”

“Yeah I’m in school why?”

“There’s something ugly coming, the paparazzi know you were here.”

“WHAT?! Did you tell them?!”

“I swear I didn’t Amy but they know everything, I told you I wasn’t sure if we could make it.”

“Great, my whole school knows already.”

“I’ll figure something out, I promise baby.”

“Good, I better get back to class. See you soon?”

“Sooner than you think baby girl.”

He hung up and I ran back into the classroom.

The rest of the day was a mess and I couldn’t get people to stay away from me. Everyone was asking and turning to me and it was driving me insane how they made fun of me and told me I was lying about everything. I couldn’t handle it and tried everything I could to ignore it.

I didn’t speak with Kristy because I was still sure that she had said something to the rest of my school. I couldn’t trust anyone right now.

I stood by my locker and found the books I’d need for the rest of the day and heard Tyler yell from the other side of the hall as he came closer to me.

“So you’re fucking a superstar now? That’s how you think you can make it in this world.”

“It’s none of your business.”

“Well you see it kinda is Amy, because that makes you more popular than me around here.”

“At least I created my name the right way instead of scaring people to it. You’re nothing but a school bully that no one likes but stick around for because they’re scared of you. I ensure you outside of these walls you’re a nothing Tyler and I can make you even less if you don’t start watching your back. I’ve been harassed by you for the last time. I’m not just gonna listen to your pathetic bullshit anymore because my agents will hear about it and get you destroyed, so don’t even for a second think you can make a name for yourself in the better way like I’ve done.”

I smacked my locker door and turned to face him and he was still standing there threatening me.

“Last time I checked you were the popular one here with a way too big ego and the one who needed extra classes. You’re mean to people because your parents don’t care about you and are way too busy with whatever they make. Your dad is a drunk and your only way to cope with it is to take the anger you have out on other people. You won’t make it to college because guess what your dad drank those money up as well. So if you’re really going to judge me for having depression and trying to defeat it go on. I’m here. Give it all up on me now.”

Tyler’s smirk faded from his face and I felt fucking great about myself for finally doing what I’ve wanted to do for a long time but never had the strength to do. He didn’t say anything he just turned around and left. But a little down the hall he stopped and turned around. I was still standing by my locker and looked at him with a judging look.

“This is not the last you’ve seen of me Amy Johnson.”

“But it is Tyler because no one wants to hear any more of your pathetic excuses to be a prick to other people.”

I winked at him and left to go home. I didn’t care in the moment I was in right now.

I found Kristy on the way out but I was still angry with her.

“So what’s going on?”

She looked at me and I turned to her as we stood outside in the sunshine.

“I’m still mad at you because you’re the only one who knows what’s been going on.”

“But where would they have gotten the pictures?”

“I guess there must have been a sneaky paparazzo. They found us in New York as well.”

“Are you ever going to tell anyone?”

“Not now. I can’t do that to either of us. As for now this just needs to be forgotten. Are we clear?”

“Of course.”

“Great. See you tomorrow?”

“Sure, you picking me up?”

“Yeah maybe. I don’t know. Might take the bus tomorrow morning and get everything back to normal.”

“It’s never going to be normal again Amy.”

“You’ve just got to try and make it because that’s what I’ve planned out.”

 

I went to my room as soon as I got home and tried to call Justin but he didn’t answer his phone, so I left a message.

“Hey, I guess you’re at work or something right now… I’ve been thinking about it all and I think we need to talk about us. I don’t know if I can do this Justin. I just wanna be normal. With everything going on at my school I just need to be normal. I’m sorry I’ve wasted your time. I’ll continue with the music of course and maybe in the future we can make it together you and I, but right now we need to keep it with the music. Call me when you get this. I love you.”

I took a deep breath before I sat down and started working on a cover for my YouTube channel. It was time for the world to get another song. It was time for them to see that I wasn’t lost at all. I started working with the vocals first.

I stare at my reflection in the mirror…
Why am I doing this to myself?
Losing my mind on a tiny error
I nearly left the real me on the shelf…
No, no, no, no, no, no!!!

I gave it my very best as this was a hard song to sing for me. I loved it but it was different from what I usually sang. It was beautiful and pure and I kept working on it till my mum and dad came home.

“Amy?”

My mum was standing in the doorway as I was editing the song after I’d been recording it about 4-5 times.

“Yeah?”

“Are you alright?”

“Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?”

“It’s just… you seem so different after you’ve been to New York. And you had an anxiety attack over there, so maybe something did happen over there?”

“Everything happened in New York. I changed, the music changed… my life changed but I can’t do that right now. It has to be about the music mum.”

“And does Justin know that?”

“I’ve left a message.”

“You can’t tell someone that on their answering machine.”

“Well I can’t really tell it to his face either because I’m stuck in Chicago when I really wanna be in New York and keep working on the music. I wanna go there, be on the streets I know. But on the other hand I still wanna hide here because somehow the paparazzi don’t know as much here as they do in New York. We were caught over there and they know everything, and I just can’t do that. Not now…”

“You know that’s what could happen when you decided to go.”

“Yeah but I didn’t expect it to happen. Not in New York okay? I just wanna keep the little sanity I have left. I don’t need some fucking paparazzi to take that away from me.”

“It’s up to you, but if I were you I’d talk to him about it.”

“That’s you. You don’t know him the way I do.”

My mum left without saying much and I kept working. 

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