Peter and Brian in 'Rabbitbusters'

In this Seth Macfarlane cartoon adaption of 'The Cruse Of The Were-Rabbit', Wallace (Peter Griffin) and Gromit (Brian Griffin) are busier than ever with the many loose rabbits roaming around the town with the town's Vegetable Competition. But things get even messier when a giant were-rabbit appear.
Can Wallace and Gromit find the beast and sovle the mystery? Or will everything have to fall into the hands of hunter Victor Quartermaine (Carter Pewterschmidt)?


9. Epic Showdown

"Shut up! SHUT UP!"
   As shouting over the panicking crowd seemed pretty useless, Victor had no choice but to fire the gun. It worked at least.
   "Now, listen carefully," he told the crowd. "I've got one gold bullet so leave this to me."
   "Why should we?" Mr. Dibber demanded to know. "You lied to us about killing the beast and letting us – "
   "Hey, I never said I killed the beast, so don't tell me I lied to you guys!" Victor shouted back. "But the good news is your prize vegetables are the perfect bait and the creature will zoom straight in like the terrorists at the Twin Towers. So don't make a sound or a move or even a breath."
   But he spoke too late as Mrs. Mulch was running with her prized "baby" pumpkin in its pram away from the vegetable stand.
   "Come back, Mrs Mulch! Come back!" cried the townsfolk.
   Meanwhile, Victor notice the rides were rumbling and he smiled. Mrs. Mulch did turn around and behind her followed a surface digging tunnel from the beast underneath. She moved out of the way and the tunnel went straight for the vegetable stand. Everyone was screaming and panicking, but Victor aimed his gun for the rabbit tunnel and started to pull the trigger. Then...
   The Anti-Pesto van swooped in front of the rabbit tunnel, with the giant marrow tied on the van with Gromit on it, like he was wakeboarding on it. It worked because the tunnel came for the giant marrow. A lot of speedboats with someone wakeboarding on the grass joined the Anti-pesto. Gromit and the wakeboarders gave Victor a middle finger.
   "Come and get this, you proud, half-wit, selfish, snobbish, lazy-working, not-smart bastard!" he yelled at the pissed-off hunter.
   "Well, what are you waiting for?" asked Mr. Leaching. "Get it to him!"
   "Don't tell me how to fire!" shouted Victor.
   Then Mrs. Windfall caught the gun and fired but it missed the tunnel and hit the van.
   The were-rabbit came out of the ground and went after the marrow. Everything was working!
   But Victor was not done yet. "Vicar, I need more of those bullets you gave me!"
   "I'll get you some if you feel my boobs!" smiled the vicar, opening his shirt and revealing a hairy chest with loose and floppy nibbles.
   Victor sighed, but then he saw everything he needed. He grabbed the rocket gun, poured in some firework powder and grabbed the golden carrot award that was to be presented to the winner of the competition. Unfortunately, Lady Tottingham snatched it back.
   "What the hell are you doing, Victor?" she demanded to know.
   "I need it, my love," he said. "Urgent."
   "The golden carrot belongs to the show," she snapped.
   "No, the golden carrot belongs in the were-rabbit," he argued back.
   Then he noticed the were-rabbit standing next to him and he smiled nervously. The rabbit punched him on the head, ruining his wig. Then he flew him in the candy floss machine.
   "Take that, baldy!" the were-rabbit shouted.

Meanwhile, Gromit noticed the were-rabbit lost interest in his marrow. "Hutch, stop!" Gromit ordered.
   "Can we go to the beer tent, Gromit?" asked Hutch.
   "Later, Hutch, but first – " But Hutch drove the van in the beer tent and crashed inside with Gromit flying straight into his poor marrow. He picked himself and looked sadly at his marrow.
   But hearing the commotion outside, Gromit quickly snapped out of his misery and saw that the were-rabbit was making a scene, grabbing Lady Tottingham and shoving the townsfolk, armed with tools to attack him, out of the way.
   Gromit ran for it, but he was stopped by Philip who held a red lightsabre. "Going somewhere?" he asked.
   "Nowhere since you won't give me a break!" Gromit shouted back.
   Then they saw the were-rabbit and Lady Tottingham jump up to the roof of Tottingham Hall and went into Lady Tottingham's vegetable garden. Gromit made a move to get away from Philip. He ran around, looking to see what he could find. Then he saw a Battlestar Galatica ride with battery-powered Colonial Vipers and Cylon Vipers. Gromit got into Starbuck's viper and inserted in a lot of coins. He took off before Philip could stop him.

In the garden, the were-rabbit put Lady Tottingham down. "What do you want?" she asked. "What are you staring at with those eyes?"
   "Hi, Totty," smiled the were-rabbit.
   "Wallace?" She was surprised. "I don't believe it."
   "Well, let me explain," said the were-rabbit. And he told how everything began with that fatal experiment with Hutch and how he thought Hutch was the beast.
   "Wow, everything makes sense... not!" Then Lady Tottingham laughed. "But, seriously, this is serious. Stay here with me and I'll protect you."
   "Get your furry rash mitts of my future wife's tits, you big tub of rabbit droppings!" shouted a voice in the garden. It was Victor with a hair of candy floss.
   "Is candy floss a new hairstyle?" giggled the were-rabbit. "What happened to your face? I thought it would come off when you kicked into that machine."
   "I had to put on ice cream to stop looking like a zombie!" shouted Victor.
   "Let's stop this hunt, Victor," ordered Lady Tottingham, "before we have to live with a terrible mistake."
   "It's not a terrible mistake," Victor argued back. "You commissioned me to rid of that stinking Pesto and that's just what I intend to do!"
   "Oh, shit!"
   "You knew it was Wallace all along! Why didn't you tell me?"
   "I know why," said the were-rabbit. "He wants me to stay away from you and have you all to himself."
   "Oh, bloody hell!" snapped Victor. "All right! So if it is that stupid arsehole, no one will ever believe you, like if Shakespeare really wrote his plays or not. And you, Campanula, if I can't have your money – "
   "You're marrying me for my money?"
   "Yeah, what happened to your money?" asked the were-rabbit.
   "My business isn't doing very well, so I invented a computer to rival both Steve Jobs and Bill Gates but, when I took it to a computer fair, I didn't raise a penny. So I went to her and started dating her for money. But, now I'm not going to get it – ” Victor aimed his gun at the were-rabbit – “I'm going to at least put you out of my misery!"
   Lady Tottingham grabbed a spray bottle full of slug spray and sprayed it right in Victor's eyes.
   "Ah, my eyes!" he screamed.
   "Run, rabbit, run!" Lady Tottingham ordered the rabbit, who obeyed, bouncing through the window and on the roof.
   When Victor could see properly again, he got out a fork and flew it on her hair, trapping her on the wall. "I rather like your hair pinned back," he chuckled as he got outside. "You can hop, but you can't hide, Pesto!"
   "No, stop, Victor, please!" begged Lady Tottingham. But Victor was well out of sight.

Meanwhile, Gromit was riding his Colonial viper. He saw Victor was giving chase to the rabbit on the roof. He had to get up, but how? The answer was: to fly up the helter-skelter and take off from the top, which is what he did. He flew it like a real viper.
   Gromit had Victor in his sight and was going in for him, when –
   BUMP! He turned around and saw Philip in a Cylon viper chasing him. "You're not that fast enough to get away from me!" he laughed.
   "But I'm smart enough to avoid you!" Gromit snapped back.
   Gromit looked like he was going for Victor, but he pulled up just before he hit him, which Philip did instead. Victor was now hanging from the weather vane on the roof, with his trousers down.
   "Oh, look, two moons!" the townsfolk down on the ground shouted pointing at them. Victor picked himself up and his gun and continued his pursuit.
   Gromit flew like the wind on the ledge of Tottingham Hall. Philip followed in pursuit and opened Cylon fire on Gromit's viper. Gromit knew he had to lose him and he saw a corner coming, so he grabbed the pipe and turned a sharp right. He looked behind to see Philip's Cylon viper crashing towards the ground and exploding.
   "Phew, good riddance," sighed Gromit. But then he saw someone holding a stone-made sledgehammer and he quickly turned around to stop Philip, who jumped out of the Cylon viper and jumped on Gromit's viper, hitting him with the sledgehammer.
   "I forgot my parachute!" Philip chuckled.
   "Yeah, that's a real classic Hollywood line," moaned Gromit.
   As both of his paws hold the sledgehammer, Philip and Gromit struggled over the sledgehammer. Then the viper ran out of power and stopped completely. Gromit gave the sledgehammer back to Philip and got out his pennies to count, but he always lost count.
   "Here!" An impatience Philip gave the hammer back to Gromit and got out his wallet and insert a 50p into the machine. The viper started and the fighting resumed.
   As the viper took off in the air, Gromit flipped a "bombs away" switch and Philip fell right down into the septic tank!
   Now, with no more time to waste, Gromit carried right on.

But as bad as things had been with Gromit, the Were-Rabbit's luck was even worse. He had reached a dead end and he had nowhere else to go. Before he could turn around, there stood Victor! The rabbit turned around and jumped on the flagpole nearby.
   "No one can stop you now," laughed Victor.
   The three Na'vi warriors arrived with their daggers and tried to attack Victor, but Victor got out a short pistol and fired at them. "If you're alive in there, don't come to protect this rabbit in your true forms or they'll be your last ones!" Then he aimed the big gun at the were-rabbit. "Eat carrot, hairy arse!"
   He let him have it! He was feeling proud of himself until Gromit in his viper drove ahead of the bullet, grabbed the string of the flagpole, swung around and took the bullet.
   "No! Stupid bastards!" yelled Victor.
   Gromit and the Were-Rabbit high-fived each other. Then Gromit's viper ran out of control and was heading down. The Were-Rabbit, grateful for taking a bullet in his machine, decided to return the favour by jumping below and catching the Viper. Down they went and landed inside the beer tent, where the Were-Rabbit was laboured breathing.
   "Ha, ha! No one beats Lord Victor Quartermaine!" Victor laughed proudly.
   "Is that so?"
   Then Victor was knocked out and he fell down to the beer tent.
   "Consider yourself dumped!" said Lady Tottingham, holding her giant carrot.
   Down Victor went and landed on the Anti-Pesto van unconscious. Gromit heard roaring coming towards the tent he was in. "Oh, my God!" Gromit cried. "What do I do?" Then he saw the female were-rabbit doll falling out of the back. That gave him an idea.
   Gromit put Victor in the doll suit and put the head on his head. Then he pushed him outside and the angry mob turned to him.
   "Look, Dad!" said a bear called Raymond. "There's that Were-Rabbit!"
   "Well, if Jesus wants it dead, let's do it!" shouted the bear called Tim.
   "I'm with you guys!" yelled the mama bear called Arianna. And the bear family joined the angry mob.
   "Destroy the monastery!" ordered the Vicar. And they charged for him.
   "Serves him right," smiled Lady Tottingham as she walked into the beer tent. Then her smile fell as she looked at the Were-Rabbit.
   "Why, Wallace? Why?" asked a crying Gromit.
   "As I have no family, you are my family, my best friend, and I'm glad I choose you," were the last words of the Were-Rabbit before he fell back and drew his last breath. Then Gromit, Lady Tottingham and a bunch of wild rabbits saw the furry beast change back into Wallace. And the mind waves that change him was flying away and vanishing like witches.
   "I'm sorry, Gromit," sobbed Lady Tottingham.
   "It's not your fault, ma'am," cried Gromit tearfully. "I shouldn't have tried to change him."
   "Well, the rabbit's gone, but I just wish there was some way of bringing back Wallace," sobbed the Lady again.
   The rabbits were crying too.
   "I'm not usually a crier," said Rallo the rabbit, "but even the toughest must cut loose too." And he did.
   "Me getting old," sighed Coach Charles McFall, "I should have switched places with him. He had more reason to live than I did, me losing all of recent baseball matches and losing all my girlfriends."
   "Lovely beer, Gromit," cried Hutch, who on a throne made of beer bottles.
   "Ah, ha!" Gromit grabbed one bottle, which made King Hutch fall down from his throne. The mutt opened the bottle and put it right under his master's nose. Then mysteriously the bottle was taken out of Gromit's paws and it landed right in Wallace's mouth and he was drinking it.
   "Got you there, didn't I?" laughed Wallace.
   "The beast survives, the beast survives," sang Kenny West.
   Everyone laughed and Gromit hugged his master happy as ever. Then Wallace turned to Lady Tottingham. "Totty! Can I call you that again?"
   "You can, if you, eh – " Lady Tottingham blushed nervously.
   "Here you go, pal," said Gromit as he put a box over Wallace's bottom half.
   "Oh, thanks, lad," smiled Wallace.
   Lady Tottingham saw the Golden Carrot Award that Victor took and fired had actually survived and picked it up. "I think you deserve this, Gromit, for your brave and splendid marrow," she smiled as she gave it to Gromit.
   "Thank you, Ma'am," smiled Gromit happily.
   "Every dog has his or her day," smiled Wallace.
   "As for you, Wallace, thank you for saving me from a terrible marriage," Lady Tottingham went on. "However it is going to be lonely at Tottingham Hall." She looked at tiny Holt kissing the rabbit he had been searching for along. "Unless... I have a proposal for you, Wallace. And it's better than offering high-paid actors roles for crappy movies."
   "Sounds awesome," said Wallace.

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