Peter and Brian in 'Rabbitbusters'

In this Seth Macfarlane cartoon adaption of 'The Cruse Of The Were-Rabbit', Wallace (Peter Griffin) and Gromit (Brian Griffin) are busier than ever with the many loose rabbits roaming around the town with the town's Vegetable Competition. But things get even messier when a giant were-rabbit appear.
Can Wallace and Gromit find the beast and sovle the mystery? Or will everything have to fall into the hands of hunter Victor Quartermaine (Carter Pewterschmidt)?


4. Brainwash and Go Mind-Wiping Services

"Why didn't we think of it before, Gromit?" asked Wallace, late that night in his cellar.
   "Because how can you?" asked a challenging Gromit.
   "Simple!" exclaimed Wallace, preparing his plan. "By connecting the Mind Manipulation-O-Matic to the Bun Vac we can brainwash the bunnies. Wallace and Gromit's Brainwash and Go Mind-Clearing Services." He chuckled, but Gromit look unsure. "Look, when the rabbits clear their anti-social behaviour, they can live in the woods peacefully. And when we are successful, we can brainwash humans to leave animals alone."
   Wallace sat down in an armchair and put the helmet on his head. He added solar panels to gain lunar power to be a stronger influence on the mind waves and so it began, when Wallace turned it on.
   "Veg, crap," he said. "Veg, crap! VEG, CRAP! Say no to carrot, lettuce and spinach. Leave that to Popeye."
   The rabbits were laughing their heads off loud.
   "Oh, I'm convinced!" Sanders chuckled. "I hate vegetables!"
   "I never did," moaned Dick. "I like junk food."
   "He's not going to change our relationship, is he?" asked Terry to his partner, Greg.
   "I hope not," sighed Greg, worried.
   "Yeah, laugh all you want!" yelled Wallace at the rabbits. "Come on, lad. Full suction!"
   "Yes, sir," sighed Gromit as he hastily pushed it to 'SUCK'.
   "Hey, what the hell's going on?" asked Francine.
   "What the hell's happening?" asked Stan.
   The rabbits were floating around in the bun vac. The mind waves from Wallace's invention were being sucked into the rabbits and it was working well!
   "Maybe eating vegetables and not letting them growing is part of global warming," thought Hayley.
   "Now I know where I went wrong with ask all the girls out!" exclaimed Steve.
   "I need to go on a diet," sighed Barry, ashamed of himself. 
   "Leave it for half an hour and then we'll move on to the condition," said Wallace. But as he sat down to read his magazine, the experiment went 360 degrees from being a success. They rabbits were no longer being brainwashed and they were being blown in. Wallace saw his foot had accidently sent it from 'SUCK' to 'BLOW'! "Oh, shit!" cried Wallace.
   He was too late to notice one rabbit had gone through the pipe and it was sharing brain waves with Wallace. "Oh, God! Gromit, switch it off!"
   A panicking Gromit turned it off, but that didn't stop Wallace.
   "Get it off me, lad!" Wallace roared.
   Gromit saw a wrench and he tried to whack the machine to free the rabbit from Wallace's head, but Wallace was hoping up and down like a rabbit.
   "Hold still, Wallace!" ordered Gromit. "I can't help you otherwise!"
   Wallace did his best to stay still and Gromit broke the machine, freeing the mind waves as they vanished to dust. Wallace took the rabbit of his head and gave it a carrot. The rabbit sniffed it and vomited to the floor.
   "It worked, Gromit!" smiled Wallace. "A risky, but successful experiment." He put the rabbit in his very own hutch. "Your name will be Hutch. We'll see how you are in the morning."
   "Oh, ok," sighed Hutch.
   "Anyone of you rabbits want anything to eat?" Gromit asked. The only answer the rabbits gave him was vomit. "Good. You can eat that if you like."

Before going to bed, Wallace added Lady Tottingham to Anti-Pesto's client list, Gromit tended to his precious marrow and all around the whole town tended to their vegetables. Then it all went quiet. Except to those rabbits who had been involved in Wallace's experiment.
   "Oh, I can't stop vomiting," groaned Snot.
   "Oh, shut up!" yelled Stan. "I felt worse when – " Then he vomited more.
   Then banging came from Hutch's hutch. Then it became rattling and then a big farting noise opened the hutch!


On the far side, lied the big church and the Vicar said his prayers for his vegetables. "Protect and nourish these vegetables, O Lord," he prayed. "Let them grow strong under thy loving care. In fact, let them be bigger and stronger so I will win the first prize. And I will show them how belief will help, without putting you to the test. Amen."
   He locked his Anti-Pesto greenhouse and began walking to the church. He heard such strange footsteps, but he thought bother with it. So he went in and prepared the harvest for the poor. Then he heard a strange noise inside the church.
   "Hello? Who's there? Is it a poor man who needs a makeover, because I can give you one?"
   Then he heard a great big BURP! "Oh, excuse me," said the shy voice.
   "Ah, you're hungry!" exclaimed the vicar. "Then take you all like. Come on, don't be shy."
   "Oh, thank you," said the voicing getting louder. "And thank the Lord, O God!"
   But the vicar didn't like what he saw and he got scared. As the same something came closer to him, he caught to cucumbers and put it together like the Cross. "MERCY!" he yelled. Then he saw the cucumber cross being eaten. He couldn't believe it.
   "Boy, you have a hairy body!" he cried, before he went unconscious. The creature helped himself to all the food.

The next morning, Gromit woke up to find every client's picture in the living room, flashing like mad. And the noise was wailing loud. But why didn't those wake him and Wallace up?
   "That's why it didn't wake me up!" he exclaimed, as he studied the kettle that has been knocked out of the place for the steam to send the poker up through his bed. He turned it off and saw the refrigerator door have been left open all night and there were empty bottles of beer all on the floor.
   Before Gromit could work out what had happened, the breakfast service rang. He went to get Wallace out of bed. Wallace fell down and the robots dressed him up.
   "Mr. Wallace, you are wanted by everyone!" said Mark Two.
   "Well, go and tell them I'm hungry!" yelled Wallace.
   "No, no, you call," protested Mark Two. "I have enough problems to attend too."
   "That's telling him!" chuckled Mark One, as both warriors walked out.
   They turned the TV on.
   "Good morning," announced Tom Tucker. "Here, in West Wallaby, a strange monster has attacked each and every garden. With the footage taken from the Anti-Pesto's security cameras, we can see what has happened." 
   Wallace and Gromit couldn't believe what has happened as they saw a giant creature come through the church and eat everything in the vicar's greenhouse. Then different cameras showed them how the creature went from garden to garden and eat them.
   "Oh, Holy Crap!" shouted Wallace.
   "And cut! Perfect! Print! Wrap!" shouted the director who was making the movie. "Come on, let's go to the church scene."
   As everyone walked to the set, Gromit walked next to the director. "Excuse me, but is the movie going to show how Wallace and Gromit get into the church? You know, with the angry townsfolk and everything."
   "Well, I have been writing it, but it's easier to cut to the church scene and not make it too long," answered the director.
   Wallace and Gromit went to their positions along with the other cast members and the cameras rolled!

As the movie rolled, the crowd yelled angry at Wallace and Gromit and brought more burdens on P.C. Mackintosh's shoulders.
   "It's a disaster!" yelled Mrs. Girdling.
   "My garden's buggered," yelled Mr. Leaching.
   "What's to become of the vegetable show?" demanded Mr. Caliche.
   "Where the hell was Anti-Pesto?" asked Mrs. Mulch.
   "We pay good money for our crop protection!" yelled Miss Thrip at Wallace. "We save 50p a week for this!"
   "Shut up, Miss Thrip!" Wallace yelled back.
   "If you're not going to deliver the goods, then don't bother!" shouted Mr. Crock, slamming a broken trap onto his lap. Neither Wallace nor Gromit knew what to say or do or even think.
   "I have never seen such destruction!" pointed out Mr. Growbag. "Worse than the destructions than in 2012 or Independence Day or something from Roland Emmerich." And that started people panicking.
   "Quiet! Shut up!" yelled the stressed policeman. "This vegetable competition is not worth the trouble and neither is any competition or politics. This leads to the jealously of man."
   "This was no man!" cried an old voice. They all turned to see the Vicar coming in a wheelchair. He slowly got up. "Does a man have teeth like axe blades, ears like tombstones or a hairier chest than Robin Williams?" Everyone went silent. "By tampering with nature, forcing vegetables to grow much bigger and faster than the Kingdom of Heaven, judgement day has finally come to us! And to prove it, a hideous monster has come to punish us all! Repent! Repent! Lest you too taste the wrath of... the WERE-RABBIT!"
   He pointed to the broken stained glass window with the shape of a giant rabbit! Everyone started to scream and panic. Then everyone went silent when they heard a gunshot. They turned to see Victor Quartermaine at the door with his dog Philip.
   "A were-rabbit?" he chuckled. "What utter bullshit. Maybe the vicar's been drinking the blood of Christ too many times. What we're dealing with here maybe a giant creature but not immortal and can be easily dealt with by a hunter."
   "And his hunting dog," added his dog, Philip.
   "Do you still think violence solves everything?" asked the lovely voice of Lady Tottingham. She was the stand.
   "Well, yeah," answered the obsessed hunter. "We had to fight to save us from the Nazis, the Spanish Armada and I had to fight to get my lordship."
   "Well, I don't think killing fluffy creatures is the answer," said Lady Tottingham.
   "Yeah, like the time I was in charge of Anti-Pesto and captured three sirens," said Miss Thrip.

It's true. When Anti-Pesto were sent to Venice to capture the Three Sirens known as Connie, Lacey and Lisa that had been terrorizing the city. Many men had failed and Anti-Pesto was their last chance, but Miss Thrip steered their hovercraft through the streets and actually caught the sirens and destroyed them. But the hovercraft was so badly damaged that the board of directors decided to sack her and replace her with Wallace and Gromit.

Everyone laughed at her stupid idea.
   "What about if I find him and pretend to be its boyfriend if it is a female?" asked Mr. Leaching. "Oh!"


Who else but Leaching?
   He's Leaching! Leaching!
   You never know what he's gonna do next!
   He's Leaching! Leaching!
   Gi-ggi-ty gi-ggi-ty Let's have Sex!


In a bar room, Mr. Leaching was kissing a blonde girl. They were very happy.
   Then – "Oh! My lips feel sore wrong!" she moaned. Then she screamed when she saw herpes on Mr. Leaching's lips.
   "Oh! Gi-ggi-ty gi-ggi-ty goo!" he chuckled as he went out.


Who else but Leaching?
   He's Leaching! Leaching!
   Gi-ggi-ty gi-ggi-ty goo!


"Or maybe I could stand down the next election and go out and protect the streets more," suggested Mayor Adam West. "The streets were a lot safer when I was Batman and so was the character himself. Oh, no," he cried, releasing his mistake. "I gave away my secret identity!" And he ran out.
   "These are all good ideas," said Lady Tottingham. "But let's hear it from Anti-Pesto. Mr. Wallace?"
   Wallace felt unlimited pressure as everyone looked at him. Anti-Pesto was in trouble and he needed to think of something to keep their hopes going. "Now I know how world leaders feel when something bad happened to their countries," he whispered to Gromit.
   "Shut up and tell them something very good," Gromit told him.
   "Well, with a very big trap!" he announced.
   "Is that the best you can come up with?" Gromit couldn't believe it.
   "Ahh, that's the answer!" yelled Mr. Crock.
   "Yes, ingenious," agreed Mr. Growbag.
   And there were more approval and applause in the church.
   "You see, Victor, there's still hope for the vegetables," Lady Tottingham smiled.
   "Not the ones I'm looking at," snarled Victor, the only one who wasn't happy in the church.

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