Hurdles

Our relationship. It wasn't sonnet inspiring, the story of it won't make thousands want to listen. But it was complicated and it was special to us. It was certainly more than I bargained for from just seeing a boy with a football helmet across the room.

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82. Eighty two

I go back to the hotel and get changed before heading back out to talk to Harry. I don't know if I'm mad at him or what but I know things are only going to get clearer if I talk to him and I don't like the thought of him by himself when all of this has happened. Well I know he's not by himself, he's got all the guys. I guess I just want to be there. 

I go over to the guys' house and Dan actually smiles when he opens the door. 

"I totally called this." he says as I step inside. "I knew this was going to happen."

I just laugh because I'm eager to see Harry. "Where is he?" 

"Up in his room." Dan tells me so I head upstairs. 

It is weird being in a room that's his but isn't the one I'm used to. I know it seems like such a little thing but it just shows how much things have changed since we were together, it's sad to think that the days of us going to the look out and the diner and hanging out in his room all the time are just gone. He's laid down on his bed but he looks up when I get there, kind of surprised.

"Hey." he says, his voice a little croaky. "You came."

"I did." I smile at him, sitting down beside him. "Are you okay?" 

He shrugs. "Feel kind of shit. I'm a horrible person."

"You are not." I promise him, feeling bad for being angry. I know what he did was wrong but he's sorry and he's definitely punishing himself for it.

"I let that whole engagement go on way too far." he mutters. "I should never have even proposed."

"You did what was right in the end though."

"Yeah but I should have done what was right the whole time-"

"Harry stop!" I cut him off. "Stop being so hard on yourself, it's not helping anything."

He's quiet for a moment, just looking down. "My parents won't even speak to me."

"I'm speaking to you." I point out. "And I love you."

He looks up at me then and there's not a smile on his face but I know appreciates it. "I love you Alice. I'm sorry for everything I did to you too and the way I treated you. I'm always going to be sorry for that."

"It's fine." I say, a lump in my throat. 

"Don't ever think that you didn't mean anything to me just because of how quickly I got back together with Leigha." he sits up. "Don't think that I found it easy to break up with you because I didn't. That's the whole reason I even got back together with Leigha, as a distraction."

"It did always feel like I didn't compare to her." I admit because I feel like I've needed to get that off my chest. "I was sure of it when you got back together with her-"

"No." he shakes his head, actually smiling a little. "I think you're it for me."

"Oh." I say and decide to have some fun with this. "It's just... it's just too late-"

"Shut up." he laughs, immediately not buying it and he scoots forward and kisses me and just for a minute it's like I never moved away, we never broke up, the whole wedding disaster today never happened. I'm glad I moved away, I'm glad I got to meet Freddie, I'm glad I got to learn things about myself, I'm glad for that time but right now I couldn't care less if none of it happened. I couldn't care less if I never left Austin, I couldn't care less if I never left this room.

I think this is the best thing I have ever felt, like I could go through the rest of my life with this one person. I love everybody else too, I love my family, I love my friends, I love all of the guys and I wouldn't ever want to be without any of them but I know that I could get through the rest of my life with just Harry if I needed to. 

I never wanted to find somebody who was everything to me, I always thought that would be a bad thing but I have found that person and it's definitely not a bad thing. I think it's the best thing that ever could have happened to me. 

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