Why Your Life Sucks [lrh]

"My name is Luke Hemmings, and my life fucking sucks."

© 2015-2017 fivesaucewow All Rights Reserved.


2. 01; Average Boy Who Hates High School

High school is supposedly about learning new things discovering new things about yourself that you never knew before. It's about new friendships and new interest, new opportunities and new experiences, high school is new this and new that. 


Do you want to know what I think about high school? Well, it fucking sucks for starters. Freshmen year was shit and awkward, Sophomore year was shit and even more awkward, Junior year was less awkward since I got a hand-job but still shit, and Senior year so far as been not so awkward and still shit. 


The perk of being a Senior, however, is that I do not have to worry about upperclassmen shoving me into lockers, tripping me in the hallways, and occasionally stealing my gym clothes when I'm in the shower. The con of being a Senior, though, well I have to basically worry and stress about all the things listed above, except with people my age rather older. 


So to sum it up, high school is shit. 


I guess I could be described as your average tall kid who was slightly pale, and occasionally tripped over my own legs, and I had basically two friends. They were my best friends, and only friends actually. I had known both of them since before elementary school, and I guess we were kind of stuck with each other. 


Michael Gordon Clifford is my best friend of 17 years. We were born in the same hospital room, oddly enough, and no, we are not siblings. Michael's mom just seemed to be giving birth the same time as my mom and they were busy that day at the hospital I guess, which lead to them sharing a delivery room and both giving birth to baby boys. It was weird how they seemed to have run out of rooms, but it was kind of cool. 


In elementary school Michael was always the one who was voted class clown and had all the hearts of all the hot 10 year olds of the fifth grade (I don't know how 10 year olds are hot, but that was how my young 10 year old mind seemed to process them back then I guess, I don't know), and I was his awkward and dorky side-kick who people always called Liam. 


And that continued throughout middle school and basically up to now, as in, I am still the dorky side-kick of Michael Gordon Clifford. 


He seemed to have never grown out of his rebellion stage as most 10 year olds did, since he still acts like a complete idiot (He literally has a shirt that says Idiot across is, and girls still seem to swoon over him?) and is usually kicked out of class a lot, he also has weird colored hair and his eyebrow pierced, which 'makes the ladies crazy' as he always says. He basically looks like this huge punk and girls apparently love it and Michael apparently gets "loads of ass", so I guess that's cool. 


Lillian Rose Brown, also known as my best friend of 10 years. Lily and I met the summer before first grade, which isn't as cool as being birthed in the same room but her and I still met in a pretty cool way. It was summer of 2007, I was 7 at the time and barely knew how to swim, but 7 year old me thought it would be fun to jump into the 6 feet side of the pool. Long story short, I almost drowned and died but was saved by the one and only, six and a half year old, Lillian Rose Brown. 


I guess after someone saves your (semi-pathetic) life, you guys practically stay friends for what seems like forever. Her and I spent most of our elementary and middle school times together and people eventually thought we were dating, but then she got super hot and kind of ignored me a little throughout high school. 


Lily was no longer the tiny 7 year old with the thick glasses that made her eyes appear bigger than what they actually were, or the 13 year old with the frizzy hair that matched her thick eyebrows and lime green braces, no. Lily was now the hot volleyball player with the nice butt and nice pair of boobs that guys were all about, not to mention her big brown eyes that make her hot and cute at the same time. She was pretty much the total babe package.


As Lily and Michael (kind of) changed throughout the years, I basically stayed the same. I mean, I of course was no longer the short kid with a round face and chubby fingers, but now I was the tall lanky kid with gawky legs and had the balance of a pencil standing on it's tip. The awkwardness and lack of social skills still seemed to stick around with me, so the only major changes I went though was appearance wise (although I was not entirely the best looking like Michael or Lily, I was pretty average).


High school was all about change and new experiences, but so far from what I've seen is that high school is basically where all your friends change and you stay the same (an awkward, lanky, pale, kid with the social skills of a rock). Lily and Michael got popular and hot and probably both get tons of ass (I'm trying to be more like Michael, bad choice of words, though), and I remained unpopular and basically the opposite of the two, so it was a mystery to me as to why they still hang around me. 


"Hey buddy!" Michael appeared from the bathroom and slung his arm over my shoulders. I bet he didn't wash his hands, gross


"Uh, hey Mike." 


"So how was summer? Did you meet any new people? Any hot chicks?"


I rolled my eyes and detached his arm from my shoulder, "Er, no. And do you honestly think any hot girls would want to even try to talk to me?" 


Michael shook his head, "You're right man, no hot girls would talk to you. I mean unless I was next to you or something."


Sometimes I loved this kid, and other times I wanted to fucking punch him. Although he is my best friend and I basically made you guys think he was this hot guy that gets all the girls and shit. I mean, he is that guy, but he's also a huge dick. At least, to me he is. God, I want to fucking punch him. 


"Thanks Michael, my self-esteem only gets higher when I'm around you." 


"Shut up, Luke." 


Instead of trying to insult him back, I simply did what he said and shut up. I honestly didn't bother with Michael half of the time, only knowing I would most likely end up crying if I pushed him too far. It's happened before, and it was not fun. 


It was our Sophomore year and I was tired of Michael making fun of my favorite pair of sunglasses, they're these really cool fluorescent green ones that my mom got me when she went on vacation. I don't remember where I put them, but they were super fucking cool. Anyways, Michael told me they made me look like a girl so I told him that his recently dyed hair (which was pink at the time) made him look like a flamingo, so he ignored me for like a week and I got really upset and cried in class because Michael wouldn't talk to me. People still call me cry baby Lucas, even though my name is not Lucas. 


So that was when I learned not to push Michael's buttons unless I wanted to risk getting ignored by him, and crying in class because he won't talk to me. It seems a little bit dramatic, but I only have two friends. Or maybe, like, one and a half. Lily rarely talks to me.


As Michael was about to say something, he seemed to have gotten lost or forgot what he was about to say, and then shook his head. 


That's another thing about Michael; He's literally an idiot and can't keep a conversation going because he seems to forget what he says sometimes, which I don't entirely understand but whatever. 


Lily then came up and slung her arm around my shoulder just like Michael did earlier, "Hey Lukey, how was your summer? Meet any hot chicks?"


"What the hell, stop. Why does everyone keep asking me if I met hot chicks? No, I did not!"


"Wow," Lily smiled, "Someone is grumpy today."


I rolled my eyes, but knew I couldn't possibly be annoyed with Lily right now. I mean, I totally could, but I didn't really want to because I think Michael might be ignoring me because he hasn't said anything since Lily got here, so she is the only person I can talk to right now. 


"Sorry." I mumbled. "How was your summer, Lillian? Meet any hot guys?"


She shook her head, "Nope, but I did get my belly button pierced. It kind of hurt, but it looks cool so that's good." She smiled, "You should get a piercing Luke."


Michael scoffed, "Yeah right. Luke's too much of a pussy to even consider it."


"Fuck off, am not!"


"Shut up, Luke!" Michael groaned. 


I rolled my eyes and walked away from him and pulled Lily along with me. "Woah, what's up your ass Lucas?" Lilly said as she arched her (not-so-thick) eyebrow.


"It's not Lucas, first of all. And secondly, nothing Lils. I'm just tired I guess." I shrugged.


Lily only nodded and didn't question me any further. That was one thing that I really liked about Lily was that she never questioned me too much on one topic.That, or she didn't care enough to keep questioning me. But, if it were Michael, oh god, he would probably ask me a million question and then ask me a million follow-up question. It would be never ending. 


Lily and I continued to walk in silence down the hallway and then she walked by and I thought I was going to honestly choke on the air that I was breathing. 


Jessica Anderson, also known as the girl I've been in love with since the 3rd grade. I can still remember how she was the hottest 8 year old my eyes have ever laid eyes on (Still don't know how 8 year olds are hot, but again, that's how my 8 year old mind would process them). She did not have thick eyebrows or big teeth like most of the girls in my class, she looked rather mature for an 8 year old (Again, don't you dare question me). 


My (semi-creepy) love for her carried on throughout middle school where she matured even more and developed boobs and a butt, which made me very happy (God, I sound like a creep), and started to wear makeup. She seemed to have perfect and flawless skin, whereas everyone else had acne showing up on their face (Which makes sense since we were all at that awkward stage in our 13 year old lives) and just seemed to stand out from everyone else. 


Now we're Seniors in high school and I am still in love with this girl with the perfect face and perfect butt and, not to mention, perfect boobs. She was on the cheer leading team, not captain, but good enough to be on the team and played softball. Jessica was currently single, which always shocks me since she's so hot, and apparently hasn't made any recent attempts to try to even get with someone. 


I have this small feeling that this year might just be my year to finally get the girl instead of being the dork in the background, but I also have a feeling she will reject me and I might go home and watch rom-coms and cry a little (a lot). 


Lily elbowed my side and I did choke this time, but only because she scared me. I really need to get it together. 


"Stop staring Luke, that's creepy." Lily whispered to me as Jessica walked past us, and I swear I saw her smile. Fucking smile.


I tried my best to muster up a smile, but only awkwardly avoided eye contact.


"She's so hot. Why won't she date me, god." I sighed.


"I'm going to go on a hunch and say it's because you won't talk to her."


I only glared back at her in response, but she was pretty much right. I've never actually talked to her, but I don't think I ever could grow the balls to do it anyways. Gosh, she's so pretty


"You're so in love man."  Lily chuckled.


"I know, it sucks."


"I bet." Lilly chuckled, tucking a strand of her caramel hair behind her ear. Lily has really pretty hair, and so does Jessica. But Jessica's hair is prettier. 


"I want to like go up to her and ask her on a date, but also don't because she'll say no."


"You don't know that Luke, you're honestly a great guy. She's dumb if she doesn't say yes to at least one date."


I shrugged and threw my stuff on my desk and took my seat, "I guess. I probably won't ask her though, since I'm-"


"Too much of a pussy!"


"Fuck off, Michael!"







sorry if this sux bc first person pov but i personally liked this soooooooooooo (-:


this was longer than i thought it would be, but that's okay because the longer the better!!!


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