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7. We Are The Damned -Le Fox

This movella is... Pretty good. Apologies, but I have a rule about only reading the first six chapters, and briefly glancing through the rest, so... Sorry about that.

The blurb is good, but well... Kind of bland. It's not intriguing, is what I mean. You not only need to be vague but you need to give something away. Yes, 'tis a fine line, and blurbs that really grab people are difficult to write, but if you keep working on it you'll be there in no time. I hate to say it, but on blurb alone, I probably wouldn't have read "We Are The Damned."

 

You've written about a really interesting concept, and I liked it a lot. The plot is so imaginative, so slow-burning- but the origins of the characters were unclear. I know... That they're not human. And yet they're interacting with humans... For some reason... That I kind of understand.

Great character development- Kear and Carlotta are layered and realistic.

Try not to plot-dump, though and BACK AWAY FROM THE PURPLE PROSE. Don't think of your words as pretty, delicate flowers- think of them as tools that build houses, cathedrals, museums, buildings of beauty. Sorry, you just occasionally go borderline.

Grammar: 8/10.  Watch out for the couple of typos scattered throughout the movella.

Plot: 8/10. Mostly good, but kind of unclear.

Overall: 8.5/10.

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