An Angels Wings

Sam, being born as both genders, struggles to understand what the youth truly is. Upon trying to commit Suicide, Sam is stopped by a strange man who claims the youth is more then what meets the human eye. Part 3 of Lovers Of legend Series.

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2. Chapter 2

When An Angel sings, it spreads it's wings.

You said people like me are born from sin.

"I'm sorry, but Annie is not quite at that age yet where we can perform surgery on her. We still need to wait for puberty to set in so we can truly determine what Annie's true gender is.

"I don't wanna change momma..." Sam said, the child's golden eyes reflecting true sadness at the mother.

Alana's eyes showed the same feelings, but she refused to speak, her eyes shifting to John. Alana would rarely speak in public. Sam knew why, Alana was controlled by John. Acting almost emotionless and like a robot.

"You have to change Annie. God created only one gender." John said.

You tried to break me.

"The results are in. We are unable to determine Annie's true gender. So it comes down to this. What gender would you prefer Annie to be?"

"Girl." John said quickly, glancing at Alana who nodded almost feverishly, as though not wanting to be scorned by John.

"I want to be both." Sam said, the youth's eyes showing wisdom beyond the teens years.

"You cannot be both you were made to be a female Annie."

Suddenly Sam erupted into a fiery rage, balling fist and gritting teeth. "I was born this way, I am Sam, and I will stay Sam."

You chained me...

"MOM! DON'T LET THEM CHANGE ME! STOP! LET GO YOU FUCKING CUNT!" Sam erupted into a fit of screams as several nurses came in, grabbing a hold of Sam's arms and holding them down as they administered the fated dose of sedation.

"STOP IT! LET GO! FUCK YOU! MOM! MOOOM!" It was then Sam's screams turned to weak wails of protests. They were going to take away a part of Sam, a part of Sam's very being. Sam wouldn't allow this, Sam couldn't...

Alana watched in hidden horror, her eyes showing such pity for Sam. Alana was helpless to stop them. John watched in hidden satisfaction, believing that this would cure Sam of all sin in some way. Perhaps granting Sam into the gates of heaven.

And perhaps beat Sam into submission.

You mutilated me...

"H-How c-could you..." Sam's hands were grasping at the inner thighs of the youth's body, feeling the missing part of the youths very soul. Sam had just woken up from the surgery ending. Waking up to a nightmare. Oh how Sam wished for it to not be true. Pain ricochet through Sam, causing the youth to wail in agony and despair as the missing part of the youths soul.

Alana could not comfort Sam, knowing that it was a sin to comfort the sinners. It was a sin to engage in such emotions. She could do nothing but watch Sam wail. John barely offered words of comfort to the youth, saying that Sam's sins was nearly washed and that Sam would now be a true girl, just as god intended.

"I HAAATE YOOOU!"

But despite your efforts, I defeated the odds.

"It...grew back..."

Sam stared in belief at the naked reflection. The youth's male genitals had completely came back. But this was impossible as Sam's male genitals had been completely mutilated and completely removed. But there is was, back where it needed to be.

Sam was unsure of what to do at this point. Tell the parents? Or keep it secret? They would surely take Sam away some place. Sam would be considered a freak of nature. No, the youth couldn't go through with that.

Slowly, a smile appeared on Sam's face and tears slipped down the youth's cheeks. Sam could truly be Sam again. The youth would keep this a secret, forever if needed.

Was this god tricking me? perhaps this is another test? Or is God giving me what I truly desire? To be myself? To live life to my fullest?

I am Sam...And Sam shall I be...

.../\/\/\...

My eyes stared out the window as events passed me by. The sun reflecting on my unnatural golden orbs as I pondered what to do.

Or I at least tried to, as my father was once again angry at me. I had just gotten dropped off by the cops after running from the therapist.

"You once again run off when we are trying to help you! LOOK AT ME!" He was screeching now. Now I couldn't avoid him. How I wished to be out of this house and hanging out with Chloe. Or the "Whore of a slut" as my father called her. As Chloe was of course bi-sexual.

Slowly, I turned my head, staring at him with a glint of rage boiling in my chest. How I wished to break his bones. How I wished to make him bleed. How I wished to break his jaw so he would never spew such hatred and intolerance towards me ever again.

"We love you, very much, and we want to save you from torment. God intended for you to be a beautiful woman. And we want to accomplish that."

I hate you dad. Everything you do is nothing but hatred from your blackened heart.

"I really don't want to talk to you." I said bluntly, containing my rage for the moment.

"Well too bad! We're having this conversation now. SIT DOWN!" He screeched so loud I thought My ears would bleed. Once again, trying to scare us, throw us into submission. Mother was inwardly cowering in the very chair she sat in, not speaking a word at all.

"I'm comfortable standing up thank you." I said smartly, earning the look of absolute rage from my father. Good, I wanted him to get mad. I wanted him to get rid of me, kicking me out would be an absolute blessing. But no, they persisted in keeping me.

They weren't my real parents at all. I knew this upon inspection. I looked nothing like my parents. I had been adopted as an infant. They refused to tell me my real parents names. I suspected they didn't know for sure or perhaps thought it would be a sin to find my real parents.

This is a cult, not a family...

"I SAID SIT DOWN!" I swear the house shook from his annoying voice. Grudgingly, I took a seat next to my mom, who refused to look at me.

I wish you would speak for me mom. I wish you had the courage like I do. I know you love me for being Sam. I know you do. I will never hate you. I pray one day...You'll come out of this.

I love you mom.

"You're mother and I think it would be best, if perhaps we pulled you out of the school system. And home school you-"

"The fuck you say?" I was startled by this idea. Pull me away from society? Rip me away from my loving friends? Make me a hermit?

"Do NOT curse in MY HOUSE!" He screeched into my face. I felt suddenly unnerved. My dad was suddenly breaking my space. He never was usually like this. What was making him change?

Was that...Alcohol I smelled?

Oh god no. He isn't...

My father never drank. He was against drinking. But I could smell it, so clearly. Was he going insane from me disobeying?

You finally cracked...

I slightly jumped when I felt my mom take my hand gently, giving a look to my dad as though asking permission to speak. "We were wanting to pull you out because of the bullying you are receiving as well. We're not caging you honey. We just want to protect you."

I saw what she was doing, trying to calm the situation. It was working, as my dad was taking breaths now. It took a mothers touch to calm things down. Still, I was being caged. But how could fight off someone that was drunk and not belligerent at the moment?

I couldn't. I was being forced into submission. And I had to take it like a bitch. This angered me.

I said nothing, unable to speak or even swallow correct, as I felt like my Adams apple would choke me at any time. So my father had decided to hide me away from life and friends? From gaming and attending events? I had straight A's in school, despite my shitty life, and they wanted to demote me? The bullying wasn't as bad as it seemed. They backed off when my two best friends managed to somehow always butt in.

I was so fucked.

.../\/\/\...

"So daddy-o wants to fuck you over and keep you in his tower huh?" Chloe asked, chewing on french fries. My legs moved up and down with anxiety. "Yup. I'm fucked."

"I'll sneak over, bring goodies and crap while daddies asleep." She grinned, thinking of ways to sneak in quietly.

Dread pooled into my stomach. The idea of her sneaking and possibly getting caught terrified me. "Not a good idea. I think." I told her.

"Ooooiiii chill the fuck out You're okay. We're still gonna go see that concert still. You'll have to have a good time." It sounded like almost a threat.

"Okaaay then." I muttered, feeling at my chin. I was wondering what it would be like to have a beard or a mustache. Unfortunately I never once had hair on my face like a man. In fact I didn't have pubic hair either which I found odd.

Puberty had not been kind to me as I found out my sexual urges refused to be contained. I realized I was getting constant boners when I stared at a attractive classmate or perhaps that silly crush on a gym teacher.

And it was sadly very noticeable.

I was sometimes uncomfortable with my male genitalia, getting constants hard ons and such. But I loved my body. I loved how a woman would look at me. I loved how a man would look at me. I loved the feel of estrogen and testosterone rushing through me.

I remember as a child puberty was quite disturbing for my female parts. My breast grew a considerable size. Being big breasted was not exactly fun for the most part. Finding large bras was trouble.

And getting periods every month was annoying but I learned to live with it. I sometimes disliked my female side because of how I was being forced to be it so much. But it was fine.

I was a very awkward person...

"Earth to Sam again. You alright?" Chloe said, suddenly worried about my sudden silence.

I perked up, almost spilling my cup of juice. "I really don't know...Dad...he was drunk yesterday...Got pretty scary."

Chloe's eyes widened suddenly, as though I grew over 50 heads. She was about to speak when William arrived with his tray of food. Always the boring material, a sandwich and a salad. He was quite odd as a dude.

"Heyo." I said to him, wondering how he was doing.

"Calculus is murdering me. And exams this month are going to overkill me." He said with a disgruntled look.

"Use Sam as a cheatsheet then." Chloe said simply, wishing she had a cigarette right now. I rolled my eyes, knowing William would never cheat as he always talked of honor in school.

"No, I hate cheating...it's just...cheating." He said dumbly.

"Poor choice of words Will." Chloe muttered, looking like she'd pop him on the head.

"We can't all be like Sam. Fucking straight A student." William said in annoyance. I gave a sly smirk, before crushing my cardboard juice box.

I was mentally wondering how I came by such odd friends. Even though I knew the answer, it was still odd. By chance I said...

...

"Are you a boy?" A girl with brown pigtails asked young Sam, who had just finished painting a house. Sam was six years old yet had the mind of a twelve year old at times. And still had the strange shimmering gold eyes.

Sam blinked in surprise at her bluntness. This was the first time any of the classmates had spoken to young Sam. "No...I'm both girl and boy." Sam replied, wondering how this girl would react.

"That means I can kiss you still!" She said, suddenly hugging poor Sam and giving the young child a kiss. Sam's eyes had never gotten bigger. A cute girl was kissing Sam.

Thats when the teacher saw it. She quickly grabbed the girl and pulled her away, quickly taking her out of the room, obviously going to take her to the principle. "I'm Chloe!" She yelled before she was out of sight.

Sam blinked a few times, touching the youth's lips in disbelief. Sam had never been kissed before. "Chloe...Huh..."

...

Chloe had been a sneaky little horndog way before they met. Chloe was very eccentric at heart, which made it difficult to understand. Chloe was the definition of sexuality. She had experimented with her sexuality on me and William, before realizing she was Bi-sexual. It was human nature, even if it was a little odd at first.

In all honesty, sometimes it wasn't gender I was attracted to. But just the personality. I was not old enough for love as they told me. Yet I felt more adult then my age. I never found the reasoning behind it. Just genes I guessed.

Despite my horrible parents- my father, I had managed to exceed expectations. It would be a terrible mistake to pull me out. Because I knew my father wouldn't teach me schoolwork...But bible work.

I suddenly felt dread pooling into my system.

"Sam, tell Will what happened." Chloe suddenly said. I suddenly felt incredibly shy. I wasn't sure of talking about this anymore. I knew my friends would possibly call the cops if my father would become more violent.

Then all hell would break loose.

"My dad...He's been drinking...He got verbally violent yesterday..." I explained, feeling my hands getting sweaty. It wasn't like my father to be this way. My mother was becoming increasingly drawn back from me. Whenever I wanted something she always told me to go to my father. What was my father doing to my family?

William looked tensed, as though unsure what to say. Chloe looked very enraged at this. The fact that I could possibly become injured from a drunk father would murder her inside.

"We should talk to the school counselor..." William trailed off after I gave him such a look. "It's out of his hands. Conversion therapy is still legal. He can't do anything about this. Also my dad hasn't hurt me yet."

"Unless you count mutilating your genitalia." Chloe said bluntly. I went silent, my eyes downcast. She had caught me there.

"The fact is, you really need to find someone. An advocate, a lawyer. Or someone..." William said. But soon I felt my anger rise.

"I've tried that...Nothing can be done...Once I turn eighteen...I'll escape somewhere...Be with you or something...One of you...I'll just play along...Pretend life is great..."

"I'd be having such tantrums right now." Chloe said, looking annoyed. I ran my hand through my thick curls, feeling my anxiety rise. My golden eyes showed such worry.

"I want to have a tantrum...But I don't want to be put in a straight jacket." I gave as an excuse, feeling sick to my stomach. I would have to undergo depression, hatred and independence for three years before getting away from my family.

I lasted this long...

"Look. We'll figure this out. I know theres something out there that can help you." William said. Ever the optimistic...

I glanced at William. I had met William through gaming tournaments. I played games such as Halo and Grand Theft Auto. I wasn't allowed to own a console but still I managed to sneak over to play games.

I had beaten him on Halo once. Sniped him in the back of the head and won the match in matchmaking. Wanted to be friends ever since. He had no idea I was a hermaphrodite. Treated me like a man, which actually made me feel great.

I got sick of being treated as a woman quite frankly, since my mother and father tried to make me one. It would be a while before I felt comfortable with female things.

I wished to be treated as a person and not by gender. But that would never happen it seemed.

"What the fuck are they giggling about?" Chloe suddenly said, glancing to a couple of girls in the background giggling and smiling at us. I knew what it was all about. They were giggling at me because they didn't understand what I was.

Giving them a sudden smirk they ceased their actions. To the untrained eye, I seemed to be whatever gender the person wished me to be. They saw me as male, so I was male.

Oddly i seemed to have some sort of charm to people. Just the other day a freshman wanted to kiss me. I never understood this. I took advantage however. Kissing was odd, but very refreshing.

I understood it, young guys and girls wanted their first kiss by someone beautiful. To get far in high society. I seemed to be their solution...

Not many people knew what I was in this school. Just finishing freshman year and nobody knew a thing about each other. I was so lucky.

"I don't get how all the chicks think you're a guy. You got boobs." Chloe wondered, making me pout. "It's my face. It's shows they are straight. They aren't focused down here. They are focused on my eyes and chin." I explained, zipping my coat up to hide my breasts, but obviously it was futile.

It was then the girls walked over, looking suspiciously tipsy. My nose caught whiff of alcohol on their breath. Ah, so that was why. Kids got drunk in school all the time.

"You're reeeally cute." One said. I gave her a charming smile. "And you're quite beautiful..." I replied, ignoring the annoyed glances from William.

Chloe was annoyed as well, considering she was bi-sexual and I was hogging the three beautiful blondes like they were toys.

To my surprise My chair was pulled back by one of them. The other girl proceeded to sit in my lap. Inwardly I was surprised by the boldness. Though I couldn't deny a beautiful woman on my lap. Though I preferred red heads over the blondes.

"Ooh, Do you work out? You're shoulders are rock solid." She said, her hands reached to caress up my arms to cup my shoulders. Chloe looked ready to hit my head with her plate. I gave a coy smile. "Hmm...I do dear..."

This chick was being pure putty in my lap. She was tipsy but good enough to know when she wanted to stop. I couldn't deny a woman some foreplay.

The other girls were giggling, wishing to take their turn on me. I didn't quite understand what was so attractive about me. Was it my golden eyes? My muscles? My height? My beautiful hair? My face?

I never had sex. Never went that far in my lifetime. Which was surprising, considering how many kids had approached me.

My thoughts were silenced when the blonde suddenly pressed her lips to mine, quite roughly and sloppily might I add. The taste of alcohol was on her breath. My mind thought back to my father when he was drunk.

I mentally kicked it away from me. I wanted to enjoy this moment. I was glad the teachers weren't in the lunchroom at this moment. My hands grasped at her full breasts, feeling the softness underneath, the woman bit down on my lip. Ah, I had found a good spot, but what about those hips?

My hands were sliding up her hips, feeling the luscious flesh of fertile female. I could smell her lust and want at this point. She was quite beautiful, but not a fit for me. I was looking for something with real personality. Not a whore and a drunk.

It was then I felt cold hands reaching under my hoodie, feeling at the rock hard muscles of my abdomen. I unconsciously purred at the touch. It was a heavy turn on and my pants felt very uncomfortable with it.

I swore my cock would pop out from it's zipper prison.

The two women behind me were touching my smooth face, feeling the tender flesh which screamed sex. William felt like leaving the table. Chloe was in such disbelief at the lucky chance I had won.

But it was then she had ceased all movement. Her mouth was no longer trying to suck off my face. Her hand was shakily rested against one of my breasts.

Oh...shit.

It was then I realized what had happened. She realized I wasn't just a man. But a woman as well. Her mouth pulled away from mine. And her hand released my breast in a jerky fashion.

"...You're... a chick?!" She sputtered out, horrified at the thought that she had just touched a breast. Good god it was just a boob, not my pussy.

I felt slightly miffed. How ignorant people were. "No I'm a-"

But she didn't care for my explanation. She quickly jumped to conclusions. "Oh my god that's fucking disgusting! She's a fucking chick!" She screeched, getting up out of my lap. But that wasn't the worst of it. Her words that came out of her mouth startled me.

"You're a fucking faggot! You looked like a fucking dude what the hell! What are you, a tranny?! UGH!" It was then she ran off towards the woman's restroom, my guess to wash her mouth. It was then people were turning their heads, wondering what was happening.

The other two followed her, screeching incoherently about queers and gays. I gave a looked of annoyance to Chloe who looked miffed as well. What was with people?

"I've lost my appetite." Chloe suddenly said. William said nothing, looking like he would punch those whores faces in.

"Me too." I mumbled, looking annoyed. I wasn't expecting such a harsh reaction really. I mean, this was modern times. You'd think things would be more accepting. My day had been ruined. But hell, those woman's hips were fine...

.../\/\/\...

I fucking hate church.

I sat there for several minutes, not listening to a word to what the preacher was saying. He was once again spewing such hatred for gays and transgender people.

I didn't get why I was here. I never listened. I never obeyed my parents. I always argued with the pastors and preachers. What was the flipping point to anything? Everyone hated me. So why did mom and dad drag me? Because They thought the power of Christ would beat me into submission? perhaps because they needed me to sing every fucking time service ended?

I stared at the stupid cross with a bloody Jesus on it. The cross in church was so hypocritical of itself. Nobody followed the bible correctly. If we did we would be in prison or Arabia. At least they followed it correctly...

We were all sinners if they bible was true. Christians were not going to be saved. Only those who followed the bible closely and obeyed would be saved. But all of them were hypocritical...All organized religion was horrible...

I wished they would all die.

I bit my lip, wishing I had not thought that. It was my own anger speaking. Just because one bad fruit fell from the tree didn't mean the whole tree was contaminated.

It sure fucking felt this way though.

"And now, we will close with a parting song. Annie, will you sing for us?" Asked the preacher.

I cringed inwardly, hating the name and cursing it to hell.

I got out of my seat, ignoring my parents stares. I walked up on stage, ignoring everyone elses stares. I just wanted it to be over.

I stared at the microphone, feeling like I was chained to it. This wasn't what I meant when I said I wanted to be a singer. I wanted to be something better. I didn't want to sing such songs of worship. I wanted to sing from my heart. I wanted to sing my sadness. My betrayal, My hatred...

The music was playing, ringing in my ears. Burning my senses...

It was then I began to sing, releasing a wave of agony from my soul as I sang songs of worship. It pained me, murdered me. The music was destroying my fabric of existence. I would sing my hatred, my sadness and agony. Even if these foolish sheep didn't understand the true meaning behind my words.

The sheep wept upon hearing my voice. But they did not know of my suffering. They were too close minded. They only assumed I was singing to god to forgive of whatever sin I held inside my soul. None of them would ever know of the truth.

I would never escape this torment. My fathers words rang in my head. Society would never accept me. They would never understand me. I was forced to be something I am clearly not.

They would all rot in hell with me.

Upon finishing, my eyes darkened, my throat burning from the vomit that I sang. I hoped to some day choke on it.

Only sniffles and choked sobs were heard in the crowd. Never a clap, a cheer. Nothing. Nothing that I wished so dearly. It was a gift from god they said, never my own voice they said. It was my voice. Not gods. They should thank me for it.

Upon joining my rotten family in the peers. I felt eyes upon me, analyzing me, judging me. Or were they?

My once golden eyes, now dark with boiling hatred, looked up to find at the fated person, only to see no one was staring at me, in fact everyone was staring down at their bibles as the pastor painfully told them to look at a bible verse of the day, before ending the service.

Nobody was looking upon my wretched face. And nobody ever will...

My eyes stared down at my barely opened bible, not aware of a dark presence in the back of the peers staring at the back of my head, wondering, pondering my existence. The figure got up as everyone else did, escaping the crowd quickly, never to be thought of again.

Upon briefly opening my bible, I realized a folded torn paper was hiding in revelations. I pulled it out, ignoring my parents glares. I unfolded it, only smiling faintly as I read it's contents.

"When an Angel Sings, it spreads it's wings..."

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