Trust Issues || punk luke ||

#5sos #5secondsofsummer #onedirection #luke #lukehemmings

She has a lot of trust issues and Luke Hemmings is the reason for them.


2. Chapter 2

Bella's P.O.V


I was walking through the halls trying to find luke and the others.....where are they? I walked up to are normal table and they weren't there, Well it doesn't surprise me; they haven't been hanging out with me for the past 3 month.

the thing that's annoying me most is that last night i poured my heart out to Luke and he said that today he would make sure that we will all hang out and get things back to normal so....where is everyone one?

I walked around like a lost puppy looking for them Until i finally saw ashton "Hey ash wait up" I shouted as he turns and smiles slightly in my direction "Hey Bella what's up?" He asked not interested at all as I approached him.

"Nothing much just looking for Luke, have you seen him?" I questioned hugging my books tightly to My chest, talking to ashton made me nervous which was sad as he used to be like a brother like me.

"Errr last time I saw him he was out on the football field" i sighed loudly as I thanked him and made my way to Luke, I hated the football field! That's was where all the fakes and populars Hung out....and I was not really classed as a "popular" kid, I was more classes as the "outcast". you can imaging walking over to the massive group of populars was totally humiliating And I felt my cheeks heat as I made my way through the crowed.

When i finally spotted Luke's blonde locks, I quickened my pace towards him, I heard names being thrown at me like 'freak' 'bitch' and worst of all "fat" but I get called these names on a Daily bases so it didn't really bother me.

I finally reached Luke but as I was about to tap his shoulder he turned his body and i felt the colour drain from me, i was surprised to see that another body was attached to his-I froze as I saw him making out with holly in front of me....What the fuck!

I told luke everything yesterday....about Holly bullying me verbally and physically-He said he was going to sort it this his way of 'sorting it out'! My head was spinning and my mind was racing with thoughts, I was hurt and confused....why would Luke do this to me?

Anger started to bubble up inside me....that bastard! I grabbed Luke's shoulder pulling his body away from Holly's and he turn with an annoyed look on his face "what the fuck are you doing" he shouted "What the fuck am I doing? I should be asking the same to you!" I shouted back twice as loud; I was furious!

"Piss off Bella can't you see I'm busy" he said turning back to Holly, Is he being serious! "So is this your way of "sorting it out"" I screamed as he laughed dryly "You really believe I was going to help you?"

Ouch that hurt.

"Well I thought you would be decent for once and think of someone else other then yourself, but I guess I was wrong...your still the fucking prick you have always been!!" I yelled furiously But instantly regretted it when i saw anger and hate fill his eyes...the words that he said next surprised me.

"Yeah well why don't you just go back to your dad and fuck him and few of his friends just so you can get enough money to buy a few razor blades to slit your little fucking wrist with, oh and while your at it maybe this time you will press harder and actually succeed and end your sad, pathetic life!" He boomed as the whole field fell silent.

I can't believe he just said that....I can't believe he just told me to kill myself! I was taken back by his out burst but most of all I was hurt. all the things I told him in confident he just shout out in front of the whole school.

I could feel people staring at me waiting for a response... but I didn't have one. I just have to get out of here before i pass out, i can't even stand to look at Luke right now because he makes me feel sick.

I felt the tears pour down my cheeks as I turned away from him walking as quickly as I can in the opposite direction....I looked to my left as I made my way towards the school and saw Ashton,Calum and Michael looking at me sympathetically.

There was also a look of guilt because they knew they weren't there for me when I needed it....yeah well i hope they feel bad! All of a sudden I felt someone grab my arm and my whole body swung around to face a guilty looking luke.....he was about to say something but I cut him off.

"I poured my heart out to you and you throw it all back in my face" I screamed at him as he stood there, his face full of sorrow "Look Bella I know i was wrong but please just give me a chance to explain" he begged as he ran his fingers through his hair and looked up at me with desperation.

"Give you a chance to explain! You had your chance at saving this friendship and sorting things out but you decided to humiliate me in front of everyone instead! I'm done luke...I am so done! don't you dare try talking or contacting me because trust me I won't let you back in my life." I raged as I walk away from him, I looked back to see his face full of shock and regret....this friendship is over and I never want to see him again!

I turned away from Luke and looked at the crowd of people that were gathered around us, I then dashed to get out if the circle...As I broke my way through people started shouting things like "yeah I agree with Luke" "why don't you just kill yourself already, your are worthless".

I felt fresh tears roll down my cheeks as I made my way out the school gates, i heard ashton and the rest of the boys calling after me but I ignored them and kept going, there is no way I am going back there and there is no way I am talking to them again!

I swung the front door open and entered my house before running up stairs, my bedroom door open with a bang as I walked through it, I threw my bag down and headed straight into my bathroom.

I began throw things around desperate looking for the blades I had hidden, I screamed out in frustration as I still frantically search for them.

Finally I saw them, I launch my body over to them and grabbed them, I place myself on the floor as I look down at the's events replay in my head as I made a slit.

I watch as blood poured out all over the floor and smiled...i then did another.. and another until I felt my body relax slightly as I watch the blood ooze from my wrists. I don't want to be here anymore...I have given up...They win. I grabbed the bottle of pills from the side and opened it.

All the horrible words filled my head...




I empty the pills into my hand as tears streamed down my face...."goodbye" I whisper to myself knowing it was the last time i would see anything...anyone, well it's not like anyone cares anyway.

As I lifted my hand towards my mouth I heard something...what is that noise? I told myself to forget it and just take the pills! I lift the pills to my mouth again but the noise got louder....It was music and it sounded very familiar.

That's when it clicked...It was the song my mum use to sing to me....she use to always tell me the story behind that song and I smiled at the memory.

I stayed seated on the floor covered in blood for about an hour just thinking. I am getting away from here and never coming back. I could start a new life....start fresh.

I clean myself up and started packing, just gathering up all the main essential and shoving them into a bag; I am really doing this...I'm leaving!

As I looked up at the hell hole i called home i felt my body relax, I am really leaving- finally I will be free. I picked up my bags and put the envelope full of money I stole from my dad in my pocket....goodbye Australia and hello England !

*end of flash back*

I looked to my right and saw Lis looking back at me, she had a worried look on her face and she stretched her arm out and wiped away a tear which I didn't know fell.

"are you alright Bella?" She asked as I gave her a small smile "yeah, I'm fine" i shrugged picking up the TV remote to put PLL (pretty little liars) on, "another flashback?" She asked as she had a sip of her drink "Yeah" I sighed looking down as i played with my fingers.

She knew all about what happened with Luke and my dad....she was actually the only person I trusted with everything that happened... well other than Luke but we all know how that turned out.

"I KNOW WHAT WE CAN DO TO MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER !" She scream after a few minutes of silence, "Fuck Lis you scared the shit out of me!" "Sorry...but ANYWAYS WE COULD GO TO NANDOS !" she said/shouted while she bounced with excitement, she knew that I could never turn down Nando's so I turned the TV off and turn to her "what are you waiting for? Go and get dressed!" I laughed as she let out a little squeal and rushed into the bedroom to get ready.

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