Never Be

Claudia had a simple life in Sydney Australia.

She spent her days wondering what her future will hold with her 4 best friends.

She has dreams, they have dreams... but do happy endings exist?

This is the REAL world.

She has conflicting feelings about one boy in particular, but to him, they are just friends.

But with hope can a friendship grow into something more?

Read to find out!

(5sos not famous)

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15. Note and Rumors

December 1, 2010

 

A/N- here are the ages to clear up any confusion: Claudia- 16, Ash- 16, Mike- 15, Luke- 14, and Cal- 14. -

 

WARNING: BULLYING, SWEARS, CUTTING, MENTIONING OF SUICIDE

 

Claudia's POV

 

The past year and a half hasn't been that great. I'm just finishing up year 10 now, and ever since I started year 9, I've hated school. Since I started year 9, that dumb teasing from year 4 has become bullying. Not only me, I have it the easiest actually. The boys get treated like shit. Our whole little group does. We all spoke to our parents about homeschooling and they said no, so we lost all hope there. Every day for me, a group of the fake ass bitches come up to me and call me names like whore, slut, emo, freak, and I think you get it. I've gotten into a few fights in my time, some won some lost. I almost got suspended too. I never did drugs in my life or drank or smoked, but me and the boys, we've been given the title 'Rejects' at Norwest, have been thought to have already lost our virginity, and that we party every night. If anything, I am virgin Mary, and I am highly introverted, and me being me, never thrown or been to a high school party. Lucas and Cal just started secondary school, so they haven't either, but Ash only once invited himself to a party, and said everyone was just drunk and high, and there was terrible music blaring, he said if anything it was boring. I still remember that day, we planned a night at my house when my mom was out, and we heard there was a party, and he begged me to go but I insisted I stayed home with his dog Indie he brought over. I told him to go and he returned a half hour later. Michael who you'd think already did all that without giving two shits, stays home and plays video games all day.

I locked my locker and as I turned to walk off to class, got rudely interrupted with a dumb plastic yelling "BITCH" in my face. It felt as if I was the only female target in school, which was true, because even the lowest girls taunted me. It was partially my fault though, I never said anything or fought back, and those fights were ones I was forced into, but hey, I can throw a punch. I walked into my first class, History, as I heard the bell ring. I sat down and noticed a piece of paper folded in half. It said 'Claudia' with a heart on the front. My heart raced as my first thought was that it was someone asking me to go to the year end dance with them. I opened it and read 'Kill yourself and tell the rest of your emo fucks to do the same' with a sweet smiley face. My smile quickly turned to a frown as tears threatened to run down my face. I held them in and I just slid the note off the side of the desk ans watched as it fluttered to the floor. I didn't even bother to turn around to see who did it, because I really didn't wanna get their blood on my white uniform shirt. That would be a drag, now wouldn't it?

 

*skip school and walk home*

 

Well, today was the usual shit. After history I got tripped in the hall on my way to my next class, and at lunch, Ash wasn't there. Mike said he was sick at home. After school, on my way out I got into an argument with some brainless fuck about a rumor going on about me. I saw he was having fun making me frustrated and mad, so I kept myself together and held back from getting physical. I simply flipped him off and walked away. I finally got home and walked inside. 

"Mom! Dad! I'm home!"

"Hi Claudia sweetie." Oh shit. my mom never called me sweetie unless she was attempting to soften me up.

"Mom. Please cut out the bullshit and tell me the bad news."

"Claudia Illiana White! You are a young lady and do not use that type of language! If I hear that again I will put soap in your mouth like when you were five." Jeez, like I'm 16. When I'm with the boys I swear like there is no tomorrow. My bad language has become a bad habit and I have to watch it when I'm not with my friends. 

"Sorry mum, what did you want to say?"

"We are leaving now to visit my sister. We wont be Back till around midnight tomorrow, is that okay?" 

"Oh ya, I forgot you were leaving today. Ya I'm fine, just call when your there I want to say hi to Auntie Re."

"Sure, I left $100 on the counter, it should be enough for a pizza for dinner tomorrow and tonight. I have stuff for lunch in the fridge for you tomorrow since it will be Saturday and you don't have school"

"Okay thank you." I wanted them to leave so bad! Like just go!

"Okay, I love you and... try to not burn down the house."

"You fall asleep with cookies in the oven once and you are forever a criminal" I laughed.

"Okay make sure you lock the door and don't answer the phone without seeing who it is first and-"

"Nia! Don't worry she will be fine! Its one night."

"You hush."

My parents finally discovered the exit, and left. I sighed as I locked the door and finally got the chance to put down my bag. I ran up to my room and got out of my uniform. It was so hot, so I decided I'd take advantage of being home alone and stay in my sports bra and put on a pair of black workout short shorts. I looked through my shelf of albums and found one of my favorites, 'My Chemical Romance The Black Parade' and skipped to my favorite song 'Dead'. I loved the guitar and the lyrics were amazing. I quickly read the passage I was assigned to read for English and the song ended and I skipped over to another song I liked 'Cancer' I remembered Mikey told me Ash was sick and I knew his mom was out of town today for work and she brought Lauren and Harry over to his grand mums so they wouldn't bother him. Knowing Ash, he would call in Chinese or pizza, so I am going to make him some soup. I turned off my music and went into the kitchen.

The soup was done cooking and I made enough for the both of us. I shut off the stove and put on a lid and grabbed two little cloths so I could carry it over. I locked my door and walked over. I waved at our elderly neighbor and she waved back but gave me a dirty look. Well fuck her. Knowing he wouldn't get up I got the hidden key and opened his door. I set the soup on the counter and I called his name. No answer. I went upstairs and saw him curled up in the sheets sleeping in his bed. I slowly entered the room and looked at him. He had a red nose and had tissues and medicine around him. My heart melted a bit inside to see him like this, I've never seen him sick before, cause my mom thought I would get sick too. I went down stairs to get us each a bowl of soup and as I came up, Ashton was up.

"Oh, hey. Sorry did I wake you?"

"Umm. No. I just woke up now."

"Oh, okay. Well I made some soup for you, want some?"

"Uhhh, yeaaa. Sure, are you having some too?"

"Uh ya." He kept on averting his eyes and biting his nail, he was being really awkward, probably because he was sick and he was embarrassed because I saw him at such a weak state.

"How can you eat soup on a day like this? I mean I can cause I'm sick, but you're not."

"Its not that hot, I mean I can eat soup still."

"Well I think you have a pretty invalid argument there." He pointed his chin towards me, and I looked down and gasped.

"Oh my god. I completely forgot!" I was still in my sports bra and workout shorts and I just totally walked through my neighborhood wearing this while carrying a pot of soup! He bent over laughing for a few seconds and stopped when he saw I had a serious look on my face.

"Whats wrong?"

"Oh, nothing just the fact that I walked across the street half naked carrying a pot of soup and the 60 year old lady over there saw me and now I know why she gave me a dirty look. Nothing big, really."

"Oh."

I couldn't keep it in any more, I burst out laughing and so did Ash and I put down the bowls as to not spill them. 5 minutes later when we calmed down Ash said I could borrow a shirt of his and I went to his closet and pulled out his 'Ramones' tee.

"Come sit" He patted the spot beside him. I hesitated.

"Don't worry the doctor told me I'm not contagious anymore." I laughed and sat beside him and he covered us with his sheets as he turned on the T.V. and we ate soup as we watched Scooby Doo re-runs. I cuddled into his side and he put his arm around me.

"So, how was school, did you get into any fights?"

"Very funny Irwin. And no, almost."

"What happened?" I sighed and began to tell him what the brainless ape said.

"Some jock came up to me and said 'when are you due?' in a smart ass way, so I said 'excuse me?' and he said 'who's baby do you got in that fat stomach of yours, which reject is gonna be a father?' he got a good laugh out of that, so I said 'first you dumb fuck, I'm not pregnant thanks. Second, a baby is held in the UTERUS not a stomach. Third, I never had a sexual relationship with my best friends, although I know you and your dirty dick has sure hit up some of your gals.' he laughed and replied 'at least I can get some and I'm not an emo freak!' I wanted to punch his gut right there and then, but I kept my inner demon inner, and flipped him off and left."

"Wow. So people are saying you are like having sex with me and the boys? That's not true, and none of the others would ever say that you did. Don't worry about them, and you are not fat, they will realize you are not pregnant because your middle wont grow. One day we can get back at them. We can show them we are more than just a reject. I promise."

"Thanks Ash, you always know what to say, I'm glad to have such a great friend like you."

"Of course you are."

"Fuck you" I laughed. 

 

*skip a few hours*

 

I looked over at the clock and it read 11:26

"Oh shit Ashton, I gotta get back home."

"Noooo stayyyy." he whined.

"Are you sure."

"Yes. You must stay with me here. And I feel a lot better now."

"You look better."

"Yes, yes I do. Now, you can go to my drawer, the third one from the top, and get a pair of basketball shorts to sleep in cause you'll freeze in those skimpy shorts. The tooth brush you use when you sleep over is in the tooth bush holder thingie in my washroom, and there is some toothpaste there too."

"Okay okay! Thanks again Ash, this beats being alone at home. This is just like when we were 12 and we went swimming and you and the boys pantsed each other and you all skinny dipped in Lucas' backyard." I laughed. Ashton spoke like a sassy 3 year old when he told me where to get everything.

"Ya I remember that! You were screaming, covering your eyes and laughing!"

"Well, I was 12 and that was my first dick. And it was 4 at once." I laughed even harder and so did Ash.

"Ya ya, Michael kept on yelling 'THE CLIFFACONDA IS LOOSE! THE CLIFFACONDA IS LOOSE!' "

"Oh god, how could I forget!" 

"Okay! Okay! No more I can't breathe!"

I got the shorts and went into the washroom and prepared myself for bed. I came out as Ash entered his room from using his mums washroom.

"Night Ash, see you in the morning." I walked out of his room and made my way over to the guest room.

"Oh no you don't. I'm not letting you sleep on that old mattress. I have a queen, you can sleep with me."

"Really? Ya sure?"

"Oh c'mon Clauds, we used to share a crib on the late nights our mothers would hang out. And we shared a bed at Lake Szatania. You can sleep in my bed."

I smiled as childhood memories of my many sleep overs at each of the boys house flooded my head. We both climbed in bed and said our good nights. Ashton got up and grabbed me and dragged my body over to the middle of the bed.

"There." he smiled.

He layed back down and I threw my leg over his and he rested his arm on my stomach and we soon fell asleep.

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