My Clarity - A Zayn Malik Fanfic.

You never choose who you fall in love with, but you do choose whether or not you want a person in your life anymore. So if our love is tragedy, why are you my remedy? If our love's insanity, why are you my clarity?
**The boys are not famous in this story!**
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2. Chapter 1.

*Lola's P.O.V.*

I woke up to the sound of my annoying alarm. Ugh, time for school. At least I have just 2 more years and then I'm done.

After getting out of my washroom, I sleepily walked down the stairs, hoping that I don't tumble down and hurt myself. That would probably be a better alternative in comparison to going to school, though.

As I walked into my kitchen, surprisingly, I find Kate sitting at the table with my family.

"Look who it is, the sleepyhead is finally awake!" Kate exclaimed with a snicker. "Yes, surprise surprise!" I said with a fake smile. "Grab a plate and take a seat, honey." my mom said. "So, what brings you to my crib, Kate?" I asked as I took a seat at the table. "Oh, nothing much, just wanted to spend some extra time with you and just, you know, talk." she said nonchalantly. I bet she wanted to talk about Zayn. Oh god, kill me now.

After we were done with breakfast, I headed upstairs to grab my bag. As soon as I grabbed my bag and turned around, I almost screamed thanks to Kate creeping behind me. I guess she really wants to get something off her chest.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you. Just thought we could talk before we head out." she said sheepishly. "Well, let's talk outside, if we stay here and talk, we might be late." I said before walking out of my room. Great, now I'll have to spend 20 minutes walking with her and listening to her talk about Zayn. Just what I needed this morning.

As soon as we stepped out of my house, Kate had a mixture of a sad and excited expression on her face.

"You may begin," I sighed. "Okay, so remember how I got super dramatic about Zayn last night?" she asked. "Yeah, I clearly remember." I said, trying not to snap at her. "Well, he replied really late last night and I was luckily awake so I replied, and then you won't believe it, but I got a reply back!" she exclaimed. "Wow, that's so great, Kate." I said, trying not to roll my eyes. I love Kate, but she gets really obsessive when it comes to boys. If there's one thing I could change about her, that would be it.

"That's not even the best part, Lola. He invited me to the party at his place this weekend!" she screamed. "Oh wow, that's huge, coming from Zayn." I said, trying not to sound bitter. "I know, right? I would've asked if I could bring you along but I know that you and Zayn don't get along anymore. I mean, we wouldn't want things to get awkward." she trailed off. "Yeah, totally. Too much history between us, it would be too awkward for me to be around." I said, as the memories began to flood my mind.


As I was lying on my bed on a Saturday night with nothing but Zayn on my mind, I decided to text him. I guess I'm feeling a little courageous tonight. Maybe I'll even tell him that I fancy him.

To *Zaynie<33*: I miss you. Let's hang out?

From *Zaynie<33*: i miss u 2. but i cant. heading over 2 the party at Seth's

To *Zaynie<33*: Okay, have fun.

I tried not too think too much into the texts from Zayn. But, I couldn't help but feel like he's being really distant these days. Has he found another girl? I mean, we're not dating or anything, but still. Maybe he's with the girl right now. Or maybe I'm just over-thinking this.

I decided to play some video games to clear my head and calm myself down. There's no point thinking about Zayn when he's probably not even thinking about me.

After a few hours of playing NFS, I take a break to stretch and have some snacks. As I pop some Oreos in my mouth, I hear my phone's ringtone go off. To my surprise, it's Zayn.

"Heeeeeeyyy, Chaarrrlliiiiieeee!!!!" I hear a very drunk Zayn scream as soon as I accept the call. I hear loud music and people cheering and screaming in the background. I guess he's at that party. But the question is, why in the world is he calling me of all people? I assumed he would've been all over some girl by now since he clearly did not want me at that party.

"I'm sorry about earlier, come to Seth's. I miss you so much." he slurred. "Zayn, are you okay? I think you should go home." I said, wondering why he didn't just invite me to come when I texted him earlier. "I miss you. I'm not leaving this place until you get here." he slurred again. "Zayn, please, it's late, my parents won't let me out of the house." I said, hoping he would drop it. "Screw your parents. Just sneak out, Charliee. Pleeeaaseee. For mee?" he begged. It was so hard to resist him, but I was serious when I told him that my parents wouldn't let me go out at this hour.

"Chaaarrrrlliiee, pleeeaasee, come here." he whined. "Fine, give me half an hour." I sighed, giving in. What was I getting myself into?

"Yaaaayy! I love you, baby. Now get your butt here, quick." he exclaimed before the line went dead. He just said that he loved me?! What the fuck? I think that was just the alcohol talking. But wait, alcohol makes you tell the truth, right? Ugh, I should stop thinking so much and get going.

I quickly changed into a pair of skin-tight black jeans and a grey tank top, let my hair down, applied some mascara and lipstick, grabbed my phone and switched off the lights in my room before sneakily making my way out of my house. I can't believe that my family was asleep, that was a close call.

As I approached my destination, I could hear the loud music miles away from Seth's house, there's no way anyone could miss this party.

The party was just one big mess of teenagers making out on every surface they could find, lots of booze, lots of smoke, and really loud music.

After walking around for a while, I finally found Zayn on a couch, drinking from a red cup of what I'm assuming is alcohol. How drunk is he gonna get before throwing up? That'll be a fun game. Maybe I should find one of his friends and place my bet.

"Chaaarrrlliiiieeeeeeee!!!!!!" he screamed, running towards me and adorably stumbling on his every step. "Zayn! Woah there, easy." I said, holding him tight. "Took you long enough. I missed you." he said with a smirk. "I think we should get going, time to go home." I said, leading him out of the house. "But, I want to spend more time with youuu." he said with a pout. "It's 2:45am, Zayn. We both need to get home before we get our asses busted." I said after looking at my watch. "It's the weekend, chill out, babe." he slurred. "Yes, but our parents don't give a shit about that, love." I said, looking into his eyes. "Like I said before, screw them." he said before smashing his lips against mine.

~End of flashback~

"Lola, look! There he is, oh my god!" Kate squealed, snapping me out of my thoughts. Shit, he's here? I'd done such a good job of avoiding him for the past year. I'm not ready for this.

"Hey, Zayn." Kate smiled at him. I want to run away as far as possible. Oh my god, somebody help me. I can't do this. I can't deal with him. Not now, not ever. Kill me now.

"Hey, Kate, and hi Charlotte." he said in that fucking accent of his, and he freaking called me Charlotte! As if he never knew me before he met Kate. I hate him. Why did he have to acknowledge me? Couldn't he have just flirted with Kate and left me alone? I hate that he still has this much power over me. I should be over him. This shouldn't bother me.

I didn't bother to reply and zoned out during the rest of Kate's conversation with him, staring at anything else but him.

"Lola, snap out of it." Kate whispered while poking me really hard with her elbow. "Ouch!" I glared at her. "I'm just gonna repeat myself, I think Charlotte was just admiring that tree over there." he snickered, clearly making fun of me. That asshole.

"I think you should come to the party with Kate. Let bygones be bygones, eh?" he proposed. What kind of twisted game is he trying to play now? He has already done enough damage to my life.

"She would love that! Turning over a new leaf sounds perfect." Kate exclaimed. Oh my god, I could slap her right now. Way to go, bestfriend. Now I have to go to that stupid party.

"Wonderful, see you around, ladies." he smirked before walking away. Great, just great. Things are going so well that I'm so bloodu happy. There's nothing I would've loved more than going to a party hosted by a guy who broke my heart, with my bestfriend who has the world's biggest crush on him.

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